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by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 16:24
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 47-2017 07 06

Pondering on more points opening up. What made diffusing conflict between me and my partner so difficult? Friction mostly developed when I found myself in situations where I actually needed support most. Stressful times where I found myself wrestling with keeping clear and my reality stable in rela...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 16:20
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 46-2017 07 04

After seven years of observing myself, my partner and our relationship I start to see more of who I am within this as the story unfolds. Both people in a relationship have to have a clear understanding of the past-present relationship in relation to what is playing out in the moment. Sometimes you r...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 16:12
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 45-2017 07 01

At it again after 2.7 years of focussing on work 2.7 years of not being actively involved in DIP lite. I convinced myself that doing the DIP lite to what I perceived as a minimum standard was not longer doable for me at the time. I simply couldn't physically merge the time needed and effects DIP ha...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 16:11
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 44-2015 12 05

Continuing from day 43 The next day my body felt heavy and tired. I tried to act confident and normal but I felt insecure. I couldn't get my head around what she had said the night before. It didn't make sense. I was to tired and afraid to confront her again and ask her to explain and clarify to me ...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:47
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 43-2015 12 02

I'm picking up where I stopped yesterday as points are continuing to open up. By the time x had her new house I felt wobbly and unbalanced. I am self employed and had no work and all my time and energy had gone into creating this home for us and the children and here I was. Alone again. I decided th...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:41
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 42-2015 11 30

Soon after I woke up today a picture x posted on FB yesterday popped up in my mind. A dark silhouette of a line of trees outside our village with winterly skies behind it. Below the post she wrote; "winter is def. coming". As soon as I read these words I noticed this feeling of hope come up (after w...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:24
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 41-2015 11 28

I have committed myself to focus on consistency concerning writing and doing my dip lite. So whenever I can I will myself to sit down and apply myself to do it. I don't speak english natively and I notice that I often have to rewrite stuff because what I want to express is not in the words I write. ...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:23
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 40-2015 11 25

Someone gifted me 3 interviews from the Eqafe store. One of them (the wall of shame) addresses points regarding broken relationships/agreements and getting communication going again. I noticed a very strong reaction within me coming from my chest going to my vocal cords. It felt like I was loosing m...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:22
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 39-2015 11 24

The more I write and start reading my own writings the more I notice that within the way I look at points in my life and the way I deal with them, I see myself constantly trying to externalize the points I'm facing. In other words I'm permanently avoiding to look at myself and my involvement when it...
by mikelammers
22 Jul 2017, 15:22
Forum: Writing Yourself to Freedom
Topic: Mike Lammers Blogging for sponsorship
Replies: 82
Views: 5024

Day 38-2015 11 20

Tomorrow is my birthday. A day supposed to be celebrated. The last party I threw was around 2000. Birthday to me was an occasion to get people (friends) together and throw a party. Meaning, drinking drugs music and loosing myself within that pool of energy. I had friends from all walks of society bu...

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