Be Practical When Quitting Porn

Nick
Posts: 22
Joined: 23 Jul 2014, 09:09

Re: Be Practical When Quitting Porn

Post by Nick »

I notices that most of the time when I fall back is when I am off my daily ritme/routine. So I have to be aware of the weekends and traveling or going out and thus to late to bed. At these moments I don't feel like having a fundament.

My support/fundament is

Daily routine gives stability
Wake up when the sun comes up and go to bed when the sun go's down. This ways nature supports and you feel more vital and thus less lazy and thus you succumb less quick.
Also a big support is doing daily spiritual practice, like breathing exorcises, meditation, self-massage, yoga, mantra, yoga nidra.
And then do these practices at the same time each day. Like meditation 15 minutes before going to sleep.

Anyone else suggestions for self-support?
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Anna
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Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 20:17
Location: Uppsala, Sweden
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Re: Be Practical When Quitting Porn

Post by Anna »

Nick wrote:I notices that most of the time when I fall back is when I am off my daily ritme/routine. So I have to be aware of the weekends and traveling or going out and thus to late to bed. At these moments I don't feel like having a fundament.

My support/fundament is

Daily routine gives stability
Wake up when the sun comes up and go to bed when the sun go's down. This ways nature supports and you feel more vital and thus less lazy and thus you succumb less quick.
Also a big support is doing daily spiritual practice, like breathing exorcises, meditation, self-massage, yoga, mantra, yoga nidra.
And then do these practices at the same time each day. Like meditation 15 minutes before going to sleep.

Anyone else suggestions for self-support?
I absolutely agree that the daily routine is very supportive when one is stopping an addiction Nick. Something that I've found very supporting as well is to talk long walks and in general do physical work.
Gian
Posts: 1092
Joined: 14 Jun 2011, 22:18

Re: Be Practical When Quitting Porn

Post by Gian »

Yes Nick, Judging Porn does not help. any form of judgement does not help as you stated.

realizing this point within my process and stopping ALL or any addictions has come to be of great self support.

in fact, removing any form of judgement or stopping it is removing the Burden of the task ahead, as only judgement can make a mountain out of a mole heap.

So the point I also want to mention: is about the "good and Bad" point specifically within porn.

for me to look at porn in a good or bad way, I had to actually redefine those two words for myself first, as they are contaminated by thousands of years of opinions and ideas and beliefs, and not defined by something that is solid and practical and which everyone can live by.

so I have defined "good' as living/doing what is best for all life, and bad as doing/living what isn't best for all life, now I found that to be extremely simple new definition for those two words, yet now when I look at porn I don't look at from a point of ALLLL these Judgements as opinions/ideas/beliefs from others that come up - or myself.

Now I can look at porn in a practical way - is it best for all life or not? then I require to be self-honest and really investigate all dimensions of porn within myself and within this world and to actually have research and evidence for myself that brings understanding and clarity to the point - because the truth will set us free as they say, yet the truth is but the denial of what is here, so we need to investigate what is HERE..

so what is here in relation to porn?

I am not going to go all in with this question as it will require a book lol, so I am going to place just a few points that I have looked at within myself and outside of myself within common sense to support and assist myself through the point.

I asked and investigated points for myself such as - when I was born, did I have a "natural urge for sex already? no, so where did it come from? with age and maturity? yes with age and maturity pictures of having sex with strange women and in all kinds of positions did not naturally just come to a person, it had to be acquired from somewhere, so having images and porn in ones mind isn't natural, it is brainwashed into self, so now I can realize that whatever is within my mind in relation to porn isn't real, it doesn't even come from me, if it was me then I could have actually helped myself, unlike whats happening now is people go and watch porn because they just cant help themselves, its something else moving them, like a possession.

then I also worked with the point of actually looking at the moment of masturbating to porn - like really look at the moment, not the experience, let go of the rush and the experience of watching porn, stop the thoughts and the little voices making remarks while watching porn and see what you are in fact doing in the moment, how you look and sound and feel and what is actually HERE, as the truth. as the truth is - there is a women or man or both or more having sex on a screen, and you are watching them, and you are placing them in your mind, you are now in your mind taking the position, or assuming the position of one of the characters in the porno, and doing the acts, you do not know these people, you do not know anything about them, you simply see the people as sex objects in the moment that you can do with what you want to.. you are in control and you are deciding, you are the one being loved and praised and having the pleasure and fun and all the sex you can have. disregarding (in your mind now while watching porn and masturbating) the other people completely for even being human as actual people, they are now simply sex objects to pleasure you - here comes the punch line, it sounds a lot like a rape taking place does it not??

and this is the scariest part - we are doing it so innocently as if it has NO consequences on us or anyone else, yet it is a known fact, the we humans learn to do things through first practicing and getting our minds in place for what it is we want to achieve, and its done through repetition, and what is happening within watching porn - a lot of repetition and a lot of acting out the acts in the mind to prepare the mind to now take this information and live it out physically, why else would we have so much repetition going on in our minds regarding the same thing, the body is assuming its now training, getting ready.

and we don't even see or realize that this is happening, this practicing/repetition for what is actually rape,for if it had to suddenly become real in a single moment it would be classified as rape. imagine what is happening in your mind as the porn in your mind and it had to come to life suddenly, what will it in fact be.

many do live out what they have practiced in porn in their marriages and in their relationships and the few with weaker minds (due to education/environments etc) or less self control or a much bigger desire for sex, or those that is rejected by society as being outcasts and not fitting in, will sometimes turn to rape as the practice in the mind never gets to actually be applied (because they don't have the equal opportunity with having for instance relationships etc) and thus build up and accumulates till there is a possession. and since porn is never real or close to what two humans can share as sex in a lifetime, it never works out in any of the situations.

then the next point is why does porn exist?? why did we make it a norm - this one I will not go into now.

but you see how I have pushed myself to self-investigate the point of porn to become self-honest within the point, to let go of judgments and to instead live by principle of whats best for all life life as that which is now good.

because I had that exact same point you mentioned of FUCK this BAD and fuck this judgement and fuck it all, and go into spitefulness as a form of revolution and watch porn and feel good for doing bad, and then the regret comes in and the whole thing time-loops again.
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Greedy
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Joined: 02 Feb 2015, 04:36

Re: Be Practical When Quitting Porn

Post by Greedy »

Nick wrote:(copied from my thread - introducing myself, Nick)

Something I found out these days is that I judge more that I thought. I judged myself for watching porn. I was like porn is bad and wrong.
Yesterday I watched 3 short videos of porn. Then I stopped it and masturbated myself to get myself away from porn. I thought at least it better than having these images in my mind. I try to not feel guilty about it anymore. It doesn't work to blame myself. It doesn't work to call porn bad or wrong. Its a judgement. And when I tell myself that it is wrong that it becomes a forbidden area.

Porn is not bad and not wrong. But it does not serve me. It is not healthy for my system, it is not beneficial for my being.
If I call it bad or wrong, than a part of myself will go like ''fuck it, fuck the world, fuck your judgements, fuck yourself, fuck your perceptions of the yourself and the world, fuck the universe, I don't want to deal with all that so I am going to watch porn''.
It is unbelievable how this works but it is like this. Judgments does not work. They create a bigger problem. Judgements create problems from problems and problems from solutions. hahaha isnt it fascinating.

very well said :)
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