[9:05 PM] marlen set the channel topic: "That is not really me" - Who are we behind this statement? - Let's start!
[9:05 PM] marlen Hi guys! Today let’s open up the sneaky pattern that all of us have probably had when it comes to addressing or referring to some of our patterns, thoughts, behaviors or backchat that we’ve become aware of and subtly say ‘this is not who I really am’ or ‘a part of me’ or ‘my mind says..’
[9:05 PM] can anyone relate to this?
[9:06 PM] randy indeed...
[9:06 PM] although, it has been a while
[9:06 PM] carlton Yes
[9:06 PM] marlen This came up within a very cool interview published today on Eqafe with Jack and Joe, here’s the link for reference: Introduction to Physical Emotions - Quantum Systemization - Part 149 https://eqafe.com/p/introduction-to-phy ... n-part-149
EQAFE - Self-perfection Interviews, Books & Music
Introduction to Physical Emotions - Quantum Systemization - Part 149
Are emotions and feelings always related to energy, or is it possible for us to live a feeling or emotion to such an extent that it becomes a real part of who we are? When facing aspects of ourselves and what we have allowed, how does the statement That is not really me actually disempower us from being able to really change? In this interview Jack speaks through the Portal with someone w... (314KB)
[9:07 PM] randy oh, man, haven't gotten to give that a listen yet
[9:07 PM] valentin.rozman Cool
[9:07 PM] marlen not a problem though randy, we'll talk about our experience in relation to this 'habit'
[9:07 PM] This is a cool opportunity to share about this pattern or habit some of us have created when referring to our minds as a ‘part’ of us or ‘separate entity’ that we are not
[9:08 PM] or when we try and excuse ourselves saying ‘this is not who I really am’
[9:08 PM] So, let's first open up what have you found exists behind this tendency to separate ourselves from our minds in this kind of statements?
[9:10 PM] randy it is a habit but, after doing that a lot over the years, I stopped and looked at it - at me making that statement - and asked myself, if it's not me, then who the fuck is it? I realized that Yeah, it is me - at least it's a part of me that I haven't yet looked at/faced...
[9:10 PM] marlen For example in my case I did it today when writing to someone I said 'a part of me wants to consider doing that... and another part of me....' so upon reflecting on it, I saw how the intent was to try and 'save face' in case my consideration was wrong or 'too ludicrous' at the eyes of the other person reading, instead of simply saying 'I am considering or 'I want to do this' and simply sharing it as a reference to another.
[9:10 PM] dan Ego protection
[9:10 PM] marlen exactly dan, where we create this idea that 'it's the mind doing it, evil mind! not me! I'm not' so, of course this also considering might come up even in the most subtle ways while we speak, while we look at ourselves, in our writings, in vlogs etc. so, what else comes up behind it?
[9:12 PM] kims I have just started out the process of self forgiveness regarding anger and how I didn't believe that I was an angry person, because I didn't actually feel angry.
[9:12 PM] tormod i sort of did this - i had a nasty thought/backchat today nasty fucker... and then i just breathed, and leveled with it. and the idea of "this is not me", "it is not who i am" was clearly there, but i did not believe that as such, so i forgave it and breathed through it.. and found stability in my words
[9:12 PM] kimamourette so are we talking here about those "secret indulgences" or "desires" in the mind or more about the things we tend to judge, like anger, jealousy, etc
[9:12 PM] marlen lol randy yes it is so, though here also considering extending the support to many more who are at the beginning stages of their process, I've had situations where people still think that there are 'voices in the head' that are not their own for example, and exist in a constant battle 'towards it' because of believing that 'the mind is a program, it's not me' type of thing. So this is also in relation to expand and share how we can catch ourselves -even in the past or recently - doing this and to see 'what was I trying to hide from me, what was I trying to excuse or victimize myself in relation to saying it this way 'it's only a part of me' or 'this is not really who I am'
[9:12 PM] martijn o yes @kims I remember discovering emotions that I didn't think I had
[9:13 PM] marlen that's a cool example there tormod so what came up within you as you were saying to yourself 'this is not me'? did you notice this statement assisted you or further separated you from standing as the solution?
[9:13 PM] kims yes martijn, although I have never been aware of it as an emotion, even now!
[9:14 PM] its like I know I should be angry and I just brush it off
[9:14 PM] valentin.rozman At the beginning of the process I also considered myself as a peaceful and calm person but then I realised that I am reacting very much however I have introverted and suppressed such reaction and that created consequences as the irritated part of the skin
[9:14 PM] marlen whichever @kimamourette it's more like when we say for example 'a part of me desires this' or this backchat I've held about this other person is not really who I am - so here looking more at how we address ourselves as 'the mind is doing it, not me, it's not who I am' and so walking through that split/separation towards an actual embracing of self as the mind
[9:14 PM] randy indeed marlen. for me, it was denial - where I had reacted to something and then didn't want to take full responsibility for my behavior
[9:15 PM] kims yes valentin.rozman exactly my body goes into a stress reaction
[9:15 PM] martijn yes @kims it's fully automated to not feel it
[9:15 PM] kims yes lol
[9:15 PM] tormod well marlen i was in shock, but like i said the thoughts of "this is not me" was there - i did not give them much attention from how i was shocked ... so i sort of suppressed that part where i would say this is not me.... i suppressed it... interesting.
[9:16 PM] carolyne Very supportive and timely interview!
[9:16 PM] marlen yes another cool one randy, denial, where we make ourselves inferior to it, because we exist in a judgment of that 'part of ourselves' instead of seeing yes, this is me, I've created it and lived it all the way, so, one can instead work directly with denial and then the judgments that we have created about ourselves as such patterns, so as to stand Equal to ourselves as our minds
[9:16 PM] @tormod there you go, hence the relevance of opening this 'sneaky' point or ways to relate to our minds where we then go into a suppression, a 'split', a separation that as randy explained, it prevents us from being able to take full responsibility for it
[9:17 PM] alyson This is interesting timing, as this statement" this is not my thought" came up bizarrely during a business women's group yesterday. One of the woman was discussing the strange situation she was in where it was a hot day and she was walking down the street with an ice cream, when she noticed an attractive woman( my friend is married with kids and not gay) walking under some scaffolding on a building site and she had the thought' I want to fuck her' come from nowhere, and she said that was not my thought, it must have been from the work men and I picked it up, but is this really so, was it her imagination or a deep subconscious pattern, rising up'? Perspectives please.
[9:17 PM] kimamourette interesting @tormod, that is something I can relate to. With me that thought of "this is not me" manifest as a reaction of resistance and shock to those thoughts coming up in my mind and then a want to suppress and hide it. I experienced this recently as well, where i felt "offended" by someone's words, and went into a reaction of hate towards them and I saw how i was trying to avoid facing that experience and those thoughts within me but then realized it would only spiral out of control if i didnt address it immediately. Through then applying SF I eventually actually saw the person and their words to be a "gift" as the intense reaction to it was revealing quite a big point which i hadnt yet really opened up for myself.
[9:17 PM] marlen because if we look at it, what's behind this statement of 'this is not who we are' - what comes up within me is yes denial and also like a 'fighting' mode, a 'conflict' that one creates about this something within ourselves that we don't want to recognize as ourselves, as our creation = which makes the process of self-responsibility unnecessarily more difficult -
[9:18 PM] carolyne For me,this dimension of of denial is represented through rejection, where I am rejecting this part of me almost totally even if it has physically manifested through and as my living. This reaction stands as a point of suppression that is so physical that I never even questioned it.
[9:18 PM] randy very cool @kimamourette
[9:18 PM] martijn I have that with grieve @kims , I need to first get stomach ache to realise that I have an emotion to feel
[9:19 PM] kims interesting martjin
[9:19 PM] valentin.rozman My right knee has been reminding me lately about instances when I unconsciously engage in a polarity backchat about decisions that I have to made and I am still surprised how much of what is going on in my mind I take for granted and how much I still need to face it and stop automatic reactive thinking
[9:19 PM] rebeccadalmas I have been practicing to stand as a word within what is moving within me, to call it out by name, kind of like the process of defining words, yet also, to see this as what I am allowing myself to be as a word. For example, to day I noticed I worried about the way I said something to someone, so I realized it was inferiority, and fear. Even though it was fast, as in a reaction, and appeared small, I noted it, and stood with it, to define it, to then redefine it.
[9:19 PM] marlen alyson, I would have first asked her, well do you have any judgments if it was in fact your thought? my perspective is that any perception that there is something that is 'ours' or not or 'picking it up' becomes a way to also separate ourselves from what we in one way or another accept and allow within us, so here that's a cool example to look at where through judging what comes up in us, we immediately want to separate ourselves from it, instead of first walking through the judgment towards what 'came up' in us and standing equal to it
[9:19 PM] martijn I remember as a kid I decided to never cry anymore, so probably from there
[9:20 PM] carolyne So I accept the suppressed state and completely reject taking responsibility for who I am in a given moment
[9:20 PM] randy cool @rebeccadalmas
[9:20 PM] marlen @kimamourette that's a cool example there of how your relationship to saying 'this is not me' is of suppression or hiding, and instead you moved to take responsibility for it and stand clear within it, embracing it as yes a part of you that you can then stand up from and change
[9:20 PM] martijn cool rebecca
[9:21 PM] tormod yes @kimamourette it was also with me in the meeting of eyes of a womman, quick passing by that I hads this nasty voice. so i was at first sort of paralyzed and seconds later after the voice i heard the small talk within going "this is not me" " i dont do this" - but that was suppressed and denied. all my focus whas on the voice in my head/mind. and the fact that it happened.
[9:21 PM] carolyne Yes @kimamourette
[9:22 PM] marlen @carolyne there you go, even saying 'a part of me' is explained to then also be an indication where we can look at if we hold a judgment towards that within/as ourselves, and so to rather walk through the judgments that leads you to want to hide from it or suppress it in order to learn to stand equal to you as it, see it 'for what it is' so that you can understand it, embrace it and so walk a solution within it
[9:22 PM] tormod after forgiving the voice in itself it cleared abit, but i have forgotten the little conversations behind...
[9:22 PM] rebeccadalmas Cool @kimamourette
[9:22 PM] tormod it cleared quite bright actually... seamingly
[9:23 PM] marlen @martijn that can be another way of looking at 'this is not me' where you have defined crying as 'weakness' or 'bad' or 'boys don't cry' and so believe that crying is not who you are while you might clearly see it coming up in you - that's the kind of splits we're looking at here to self-investigate
[9:23 PM] rebeccadalmas I noticed the desire to hide, to run from looking at some things this morning, and the realization that in standing within something, just as in defining words, the fear is actually greater than the ability to resolve. lol
[9:24 PM] carolyne This ties in quite well with the chat we had yesterday @kimamourette and because these suppression points are physical, I even was not able to see clearly because they are so much me that I wasn't even willing to look beyond this.
[9:24 PM] randy isn't it amazing @rebeccadalmas , that it is Always like that...
[9:24 PM] rebeccadalmas yes @randy
[9:24 PM] viktorpersson With me, I have found that when I split myself it is many times because I have adopted an ideal self that I want to strive to towards, or that I consider myself to be, and when the reactions arise – and it does not align with my ideal self – that is when the suppression activates
[9:25 PM] marlen for example in your situation tormod, what you can test out doing next time is instead of going into 'this is not me, that's not what I say or think' to say ok this is me, I've created this, I have accepted and allowed this, it's here, so what can I do right now in order to not go into denial or panic or judgment about it, what can I focus on and how can I direct myself as my mind in a supportive manner - so see how the key point is looking at the 'experience' that emerges while you go into a denial of those voices being yourself
[9:25 PM] kimamourette cool tormod, I focused my SF more on the emotions because the intense emotion of hate was in fact hiding an emotion of humiliation and feeling small -- then when investigating that emotion I realized me feeling small was not due to the woman's words but was something I was doing consistently to myself in my everyday living in small moments.
[9:25 PM] rebeccadalmas interesting and cool @viktorpersson
[9:26 PM] marlen @rebeccadalmas interestingly enough it is in the precise decision and physical 'move' to embrace, to open it up, to confront it that actual resolution emerges, because then we don't fear it, deny it, want to run away from it or hide from it - so that's also part of the aspects we can become aware of entailed in a 'this is not something I want to look at' within oneself.
[9:26 PM] viktorpersson So suppression/splitting myself becomes a way to maintain character
[9:26 PM] tormod yes thanks @marlen self accept and embrace in such moments, responsibility !
[9:27 PM] kimamourette yes very true carolyne these chats do tend to be on point
[9:27 PM] marlen awesome realization @kimamourette
[9:27 PM] valentin.rozman For me it is still very odd to to forgiveness immediately in form of speaking it out loud. This is also because I was influenced by my family members to be quiet and work on computers what was necessary in our business. Other factor is that I do not want others to hear my thoughts and then judge me since I have been judged a lot.
[9:27 PM] tormod interesting @kimamourette i do believe there is something more within this for me to learn about (my event/voice)
[9:27 PM] randy yes, @viktorpersson, we want to already BE who/how we've defined our self as it's utmost potential, before we actually have worked through everything to get there
[9:28 PM] viktorpersson Exactly @randy
[9:28 PM] marlen exactly @viktorpersson a very cool movie to watch this unfold in terms of 'keeping oneself aside from taking self-responsibility' is precisely the movie split about a guy that has multiple personality disorder and wont' tell more of it but can definitely be a cautionary tale of how far we can go in 'splitting' ourselves from our own minds and believing that we are not 'entirely' responsible for it/as it
[9:28 PM] tormod just like with new dip - working patterns to correct
[9:28 PM] marlen yes @tormod cool, to stop any fear, inner conflict, denial or suppression as 'defense mechanisms' that prevent us from seeing who we are - as ourselves, as our minds - one and equal
[9:29 PM] viktorpersson And that is also interesting – because that 'ideal' we create – I have found that I actual limit my real ideal self through becoming dependent upon my mind created self-ideal – hence instead of walking and creating myself in every moment – I strive to reach/be something that is in-fact limited
[9:29 PM] garbrielle an example for me of this sneaky pattern is where i was reading bernards words in the new book that's out on equate, and i was reacting to the depths of the words and i made it about him, i was reacting to him cause he was being too deep, so showing i was in fear of actually facing that depth of myself and i didn't investigate further until Sunette brought it to my attention in a chat, and it was a slight subtle brush aside, like 'oh that's b having that effect on me' and all the while i didn't want to face myself within that depth, i also did it deliberately in a way because of fear, allowing the fear to direct me rather then common sense...so it is sneaky these points
[9:30 PM] tormod @marlen what movies where you talking about ?
[9:30 PM] randy indeed @viktorpersson
[9:30 PM] tormod with viktor
[9:30 PM] viktorpersson Thus also why the problem cannot be fixed the same way it was created – using the mind – will have to change starting point and learn to create/move from HERE
[9:30 PM] marlen ah that's another dimension randy, right, where we already want to only 'identify' ourselves with the 'good' or 'supportive' aspects and whatever doesn't fit that picture, then we go into seeing it as 'not me' 'that's not who I am' - cool to create an awareness of it
[9:31 PM] valentin.rozman Has anyone watched the War Room movie? It is awesome example of active forgiveness despite of promoting christianity > https://youtu.be/mIl-XY9t_Lw
YouTube War Room Movie
War Room - Official Trailer
[9:31 PM] marlen @tormod the movie is 'Split'
[9:31 PM] alyson Yes Marlen, thanks for your support, I asked her what if that were your thought, what if you were in a point of comparison where you thought the men would think this girl fuckable, and you not, that there may have been an internal judgement at the root, she took it on board, but didn't reply to me, lol
[9:31 PM] carolyne I find it quite ironic especially with me, where I have denied or rejected certain points or situations saying, "no that's just not me" I am more.....this or that....and that what I am rejecting is exactly what I am living making it quite a sneaky point to investigate as initially, we can not see or relate to the point even though we are physically living it everyday!
[9:31 PM] tormod ahhh thanks @marlen
[9:32 PM] rebeccadalmas Cool @viktorpersson . I notice in moments where i breath, realize I am reacting, and it becomes smaller, let go and not only pushed aside, that solutions open up not previously considered.
[9:32 PM] viktorpersson So, one of the solutions here would be to EMBRACE ourselves – ACCEPT unconditionally –
[9:32 PM] marlen cool point as well @viktorpersson how it becomes limiting in itself and 'non-organic' considering we then go into another type of inner conflict if we are not seeing ourselves 'reaching' that potential within us, and so stand in conflict with anything that doesn't 'match' that pre-scribed ideal we had about our lives/ourselves
[9:32 PM] garbrielle yes that dimension of 'i am a good person' i found is based in ego protection, wanting to actually get my self interests met and so not actually recognize and working with the 'evil' part of me as i also am in a way reacting to the 'evil' within me, rather then embracing myself as it, understanding it as me, and walking a path of correction....i am working on this point atm
[9:32 PM] randy @viktorpersson , so true "Thus also why the problem cannot be fixed the same way it was created – using the mind – will have to change starting point and learn to create/move from HERE" well said
[9:32 PM] marlen cool for that reply @alyson that's the kind of stuff we can share in a very candid manner and possibly have them re-consider their relationship to what came up in them
[9:33 PM] @carolyne exactly, that's the key here and precisely the importance of keeping an eye on this tendency,
[9:33 PM] kims When I look at the "this is not my thought" point I see that this is how we are placing blame outside of ourselves in all areas of life....
[9:33 PM] marlen @tormod really enjoyable movie, amazing acting by McAvoy
[9:33 PM] tormod i was also able to embrace myself as my nasty voice... from having read a specific blog some years ago (by Leila on having a baby / being a mother)
[9:34 PM] i will investigate split !
[9:34 PM] alyson Yes Marlen, I think she did look at in a different way, but it did push her buttons!
[9:34 PM] garbrielle yes Viktor exactly....i often also when i do go into this point of it's not me, catch it, and look within and find a point within me to see how i am doing the exact same thing, like working with the overall pattern of the mind construct, this supports with equalizing myself to the mind point and realize that it is in essence is the same even if the context is different
[9:34 PM] randy cool realization @carolyne
[9:34 PM] marlen yep @viktorpersson to stop the inner conflict, fight, denial, embarrasssment, shame, guilt, remorse, judgment that we may have about ourselves as our minds and so stand equal to it = embracing it in order to then be able to change ourselves
[9:35 PM] cool @alyson that also goes then back to oneself whenever you see yourself doing the same, then it's an all around self-support
[9:35 PM] kims she obviously is comfortable with you alyson, as it is quite a thing to admit as many of us tend to keep those kind of thoughts to ourselves, so she may be open to more support in the future lol
[9:36 PM] garbrielle forgive me if i am not aligned with the conversation, i am in and out in the chat, doing my best to keep up and participate, i am at work
[9:36 PM] viktorpersson Yes – I see this problem so often in the system as well – where instead of embracing the problems that are here – recognizing their origins and understanding them – a new path/ideal/better way is created on top of the old – however that nearly each time only leads to further diminishment – and new problems arising in different places
[9:36 PM] marlen @tormod for example there, you can have a look at the relationship to the 'nasty voice' and if there's any experience within you coming up as you describe it as 'nasty' and then if there's any judgment to you as your 'nasty voice' then see what experience can you forgive yourself for and stand up from to then, for example, simply use the word 'nasty voice' to identify that kind of voices/thoughts within you, but no longer holding a judgment to them
[9:37 PM] tormod cool point @marlen taken inn !
[9:37 PM] marlen ah cool dimension as well @viktorpersson where more tangents are created because the self-created source of the problem is not being looked at or wanted to be admitted
[9:38 PM] tormod i can probably pull out some roots by going into my definitions and classifications of voices thanks @marlen
[9:38 PM] viktorpersson Yes precisely @marlen – it becomes a fibbonaci spiral – because the core issues are missed
[9:38 PM] randy indeed @viktorpersson , instead of digging into the whys and wherefores something didn't work, creating a new solution on top of the old most often is doomed to fail... got to get down to the nitty gritty of the point in order to resolve it
[9:39 PM] viktorpersson Yes @randy – and to do that we must embrace what is here – see it completely – and that is not possible if we judge/suppress parts of ourselves
[9:39 PM] marlen @viktorpersson yes which also if we look at it back to self as our mind, what we can further investigate is what was I trying to 'save' about myself by not seeing these thoughts or experiences as myself? what did I fear changing or losing about myself? what am I holding on to? how have I judged myself and so believing 'that's just not me' or how do I want to 'appear' at the eyes of others with saying 'Oh but that's not who I really am eh!'
[9:40 PM] rebeccadalmas yes, @randy and@viktorpersson
[9:40 PM] marlen "got to get down to the nitty gritty of the point in order to resolve it" that's exactly where self-honesty is @randy and here again the ever present supportive statement Bernard once shared 'self honesty is not nice nor beautiful'
[9:41 PM] viktorpersson Nope
[9:41 PM] garbrielle yes people often resist looking into the nitty - gritty of self due to what they'll find, i myself can relate as i fear facing the unknown and the potential of failing and making a fatal error, yet this is the only way to lasting change as the root has to be resurrected and replanted in a way of alignment to what is best within self correction, so have to use courage and breath and the tools of sf and scs to get through....walking self awareness is the key to such change and that is only through the mind no easy route unfortunately
[9:41 PM] viktorpersson Though it is the solution – lol
[9:41 PM] randy no, can get quite ugly...
[9:42 PM] marlen so in essence it simplifies this process when it comes to looking at what we are resisting to embrace as ourselves and simply work with it, hands on matter - doing the writing, the self-forgiveness on whatever we've attached to ourselves as such thoughts, patterns, habits and then rather instead of continuing 'fighting' and 'splitting' ourselves towards it, focus on creating solutions
[9:42 PM] garbrielle yes
[9:42 PM] viktorpersson Yes – processing all the information – seeing everything – that is the way
[9:43 PM] garbrielle we often miss the actual realization that there is solutions here, getting so bogged down in the fears/emotions of the mind, so breath is key to keep grounded and moving physically
[9:43 PM] tormod what i resist - open sesam
[9:43 PM] marlen yep @garbrielle agree, living courage is a supportive way definitely, here also considering how when we exist in 'reaction' to anything of ourselves, we in fact disempower ourselves to it, we victimize us to 'that' which we judge, which is ultimately just ourselves! so... we definitely can short-circuit these cycles of denial by simply embracing ourselves completely
[9:43 PM] garbrielle yes marlen agreed
[9:44 PM] randy And, understanding and not judging oneself for failing - not getting it 'right' the first time.... sometimes have to face the same point over and over before really finding the solution....
[9:44 PM] rebeccadalmas yes @marlen interesting that you said ‘ simplifies process’ because it is simple, the reacting and hiding and spiting is more of a burden.
[9:44 PM] garbrielle yes randy - that is on point for sure, never giving up on self and life here - perseverance is also a cool word to live here to keep moving toward what is best
[9:45 PM] marlen yes @garbrielle cool you mention it, I've walked with several people that do go into a 'giving up' when starting to see the nitty gritty and so resistance towards writing and opening it up comes - which is where we can also rather ask, well what Idea about myself am I holding on to where I see this that is here emerging within myself as something 'I am not' or 'I fear facing' - so also in a way to get past the morality of 'good and bad' or 'right and wrong' and learn to see ourselves as the patterns we've become, nothing more and nothing less
[9:45 PM] randy yes, @garbrielle , perseverance is key
[9:45 PM] viktorpersson Yes I agree with perseverance and pushing on
[9:45 PM] marlen exactly @rebeccadalmas
[9:46 PM] oh very relevant there as well to keep in mind randy, not judging ourselves for 'not getting it right' at first, it's definitely more of a continuous practice rather than a 'once off' processing, a re-wiring in our way to live as ourselves, as our minds, as our bodies, as our being all rolled up in a oneness and equality lol
[9:46 PM] tormod nice point @rebeccadalmas
[9:47 PM] randy yes marlen, that's why it's a "process"
[9:47 PM] viktorpersson Yes – so that judgment of ourselves when we do not get it the first time – not valid
[9:47 PM] alyson Yes Marlen, indeed where am I still going in to comparison or judgement , a point for me to consider this week :-h
[9:47 PM] marlen Ok so, as a last pointer, sharing here potential ways in which this tendency may come up - what kind of sentences, reactions come up that we can flag-point
[9:47 PM] in my case it is 'a part of me' instead of saying I am considering, I want this, I see this
[9:47 PM] viktorpersson Is that judgment ever valid? – Is it even relevant? What is important is that we get up and walk the point until it is done
[9:48 PM] randy exactly @viktorpersson
[9:48 PM] marlen yep that's a cool question @viktorpersson what are we giving 'value' and so power awa to in this initial split
[9:48 PM] tormod uploaded this image: perseveranbce.PNG
[9:48 PM] tormod my word
[9:48 PM] rebeccadalmas I have used a kind of check list, sometimes, to move through comparison , as relationships, to pin point what I am not embracing.
[9:49 PM] marlen others are 'that's not me' 'that's not who I really am' 'that must have come from someone else' lol
[9:49 PM] viktorpersson 'This cannot be me?'
[9:50 PM] kims gtg guys thanks for the chat
[9:50 PM] randy lol @viktorpersson - that too
[9:50 PM] viktorpersson 'I have never felt like this before'
[9:50 PM] tormod yes the excuses @marlen projecting emediatly
[9:50 PM] marlen that's cool @rebeccadalmas sometimes it can emerge as a physical discomfort as well, a tightness a slight 'sinking' within oneself even if it's not a set of thoughts, where it becomes a physical experience that indicates waaait a moment there's something that I am separating myself from and not looking at
[9:51 PM] randy that could be a valid statement, that " I have never felt like this before" @viktorpersson
[9:51 PM] viktorpersson Yes you are right @randy
[9:51 PM] It could be that I have never actually felt it
[9:51 PM] marlen or simply judging it as 'bad' or 'wrong' as well, where if we have a 'positive idea' about ourselves then anything that doesn't 'fit' that image we see it as 'not me!'
[9:52 PM] lol @viktorpersson for some reason the 'I have never felt like this before' sounds like a lyric from an 80's song haha but I might be wrong
[9:52 PM] rebeccadalmas yes, in a way, as I see it in this moment, it is always a relationship, one of separation or standing equal in a situation. And it can be initially a sense of discomfort. Then I notice this more, and am like, okay, didn;t realize this was here to this extent! lol
[9:52 PM] garbrielle yes can use the statement as a flag point 'this is not me' and then go whoops, ok where am i projecting here
Pinned by mikemcd
April 13th at 1:44 AM Pinned by mikemcd
[9:52 PM] randy it's liek standing in front of the mirror naked - and accepting all the imperfections as yep, that'
[9:52 PM] that's all me
[9:52 PM] marlen yes @rebeccadalmas that's also part of what is explained in this series with Jack and Joe, very cool stuff
[9:52 PM] kimamourette my "tell-tale sign" would be that experience of resistance and discomfort in relation to the point I am not wanting to embrace, and backchat of "this is wrong/bad" and "i shouldnt/cant think/feel this way"
[9:53 PM] marlen cool @randy that's a physical doing example there, nice
[9:53 PM] viktorpersson lol @marlen
[9:53 PM] marlen 'imperfections' also looked as 'just how the physical body is!' and that's it, of course easier said than lived entirely, cool example
[9:54 PM] kimamourette lol randy yes like dropping our idealized versions of who/how we'd like to be or like to think of ourselves and rather embracing reality as it is
[9:54 PM] marlen ahh another one there @kimamourette for the flag-points! 'I should NOT feel this/that way' masquerade of denial
[9:54 PM] randy indeed @kimamourette
[9:54 PM] garbrielle yes that'd be a cool hangout Marlen, this is actually one of my struggles and i am sure many others, so cool to discuss practical ways to support in self acceptance
[9:54 PM] tormod 1 + @garbrielle
[9:55 PM] very decent hangout
[9:55 PM] rebeccadalmas yes
[9:55 PM] marlen yeah more like the process to create self-acceptance because to me it's not as easy as just saying 'I accept myself' and that's it but more like first 'making peace' with myself through doing the processing - the writing, the self forgiveness, the realizations, the actual testing out in reality of it, it's more of a building and living process for sure when it comes to self-acceptance, which in this case is more linked to first walking through all the self-judgment, denials, morality points etc.
[9:56 PM] so yes @garbrielle can be an eqafe one once that this series with jack and veno are out and we can focus on this practicality of self-acceptance and embracing ourselves as our minds etc.
[9:56 PM] ok then! if there's nothing more to open up we can leave it up to here
[9:57 PM] viktorpersson Cool chat everyone
[9:57 PM] marlen thanks for sharing your identified points and patterns and how to equalize ourselves to/as our minds, very supportive for everyone reading also those starting their process
[9:57 PM] randy indeed, very cool chat all.... thanks for sharing
[9:57 PM] garbrielle Bernard wrote in that book that self acceptance has to be proven in the physical - so i am walking this currently, i have indeed made progress, though it is a process - i'll look at opening this up more in blogs and vlogs, as well as i have walked this quite extensively and share my success and challenges and support
[9:57 PM] marlen sounds cool garb
[9:57 PM] so! see you guys thanks for being here
[9:57 PM] dan thanks for opening this up everyone
[9:58 PM] garbrielle yes cool Marlen, it in deed is a process for sure
[9:58 PM] kimamourette bye!!
[9:58 PM] garbrielle thanks all for the chat, enjoyed it, bye
[9:58 PM] carlton bye
[9:58 PM] randy bye, all
[9:58 PM] rebeccadalmas thanks all!
[9:59 PM] valentin.rozman Thanks all and bye
[10:18 PM] alyson Thank you