How guilt prevented me to see solutions and change self / life direction - 20 October 2017

Marlen
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How guilt prevented me to see solutions and change self / life direction - 20 October 2017

Postby Marlen » 21 Oct 2017, 03:39

1:49 PM]
sunettedimensions set the channel topic: How guilt prevented me to see solutions and change self / life direction: we start 5 after the hour


[2:05 PM]
sunettedimensions set the channel topic: How guilt prevented me to see solutions and change self / life direction: we start


[2:05 PM]
sunettedimensions The question is for each one

[2:05 PM]
How did guilt prevent you from seeing solutions and changing yourself?


[2:05 PM]
Why I ask the question in this wau


[2:05 PM]
*way


[2:06 PM]
is because of the following


[2:06 PM]
kims hi all


[2:07 PM]
sunettedimensions In the deeper core dimension of guilt, I have seen in me and many others, the fact that guilt prevents you from forgiving and moving forward / changing


[2:07 PM]
So, let's look at that dimension of guilt


[2:07 PM]
Can anyone share a memory / moment in life where you can see how guilt trapped you in time


[2:07 PM]
knotted your stomach / internal organs like anxiety / fear


[2:07 PM]
kims This is very timely


[2:08 PM]
sunettedimensions Keeping you STUCK in an experience inside yourself and a moment in time

[2:08 PM]
kims Yes I have been living it for the past few months


[2:08 PM]
anna I can SO much relate to this @sunettedimensions


[2:08 PM]
adam moments where I dared not ask what was happening

[2:08 PM]
joekou there have been times where i had this for months or even years

[2:08 PM]
kims where I look around at the world and feel deep regret for what we have created and within this feel useless that anything will change

[2:09 PM]
anna So when I had my worst breakdown in process where I almost left Desteni, it was because of guilt and regret. I completely locked myself into the emotion.

[2:09 PM]
sunettedimensions @kims let's keep the focus on personal

[2:09 PM]
remember, whatever you feel towards to the world is just a projection @kims


[2:09 PM]
valentin.rozman I am currently experiencing quite some issues with the point of realising what kind of personality I have been embodying and how much I would like to change it.


[2:09 PM]
kims and how I don't see my relevance to change having any effect on the situation


[2:09 PM]
sunettedimensions of what you are actually doing to / going through yourself @kims


[2:10 PM]
We have found @kims and all - whatever you experience towards the GREAT WORLD OUT THERE is you projecting things inside yourself you don't want to admit to and face, it's easier to feel it out there than working with it inside self


[2:10 PM]
kims yes I have just had a chat with my buddy about this very point sunettedimensions


[2:11 PM]
yes


[2:11 PM]
sunettedimensions people tend to hide what they do to themselves and ourselves by projecting it WAY OUT THERE, but there is practically no way you can experience that towards the world with not actually having a personal relationship towards the world / everyone within it


[2:11 PM]
kimamourette I'm dealing with it right now, even the physical manifestation of the knotted stomach. I didn't even see the guilt dimension until Sunette pointed it out to me. I was working with dimensions of self-doubt and disempowerment but looking at it now it's so clear that I have been constricting and suppressing myself because i have been feeling guilty for not achieving and doing what I believed I should be achieving and doing


[2:11 PM]
anna It is interesting when you say that @valentin.rozman - because to me, looking at that statement from the outside, it is such a beautiful moment, as though you are preparing yourself for your birthday lol, the birth of the real Valentin - but I suppose that's also the point here, that we keep ourselves locked in guilt and self-judgment, rather than taking it all the way through to self-change in self-honesty and gifting ourselves the gift of change.


[2:11 PM]
valentin.rozman Lately I feel also like my hearth is becoming more sensitive, that arrhythmia is becoming more frequent and that is being triggered very fast by even smallest thought or reactions.

[2:11 PM]
sunettedimensions Therefore cannot honestly be feeling that towards the world and everyone in it..

[2:12 PM]
anna So when I have these moments, at first I feel totally resisting to seeing it (had such a moment today as well) but then once I see it, t is such a celebration because I've broken through to something more real within myself - I am more here and not locked inside a lie I tell myself.


[2:12 PM]
ingrids I am looking at a connection between guilt and blame (which in Dutch the same word is used for as 'schuld') - and if/how blame towards a 'loved one' is connected to a form of unresolved guilt within me. But not yet see clearly how.

[2:12 PM]
adam like with the issue of gossip sensing that something is going around but dare not ask because the guilt covers everything that might be said about me some of which may be true


[2:12 PM]
sunettedimensions Okay let's get SPECIFIC

[2:12 PM]
ida yes this is very timely for me too. Experiencing guilt/shame and stuck in it, like it is too much to forgive and I don't deserve it


[2:12 PM]
sunettedimensions people out there won't relate much to what we are sharing atm

[2:12 PM]
with being so vague

[2:12 PM]
So, a practical example with me


[2:12 PM]
I have felt guilt with my partner

[2:13 PM]
kims I am going to write myself a statement of who I would like to be, the words that I can live, it was suggested to me to revisit what my purpose is

[2:13 PM]
sunettedimensions feeling like I COULD and SHOULD HAVE done more for him in his career cause of life and money circumstances not allowing him too

[2:13 PM]
garbrielle i had this last night where a fly was waking across the floor and i thought it was strange so i kind of nudged it to see if it would fly, i saw it wouldnt and figured it was injured... i wanted to potentially kill it to stop any suffering and my sis said no itll die on its own, i looked at that and said ok, minutes later it was shriveled up and died...i felt guilt and bad about myself cause i didnt put it out of its misery sooner


[2:13 PM]
sunettedimensions YET


[2:13 PM]
my life and money circumstances also did not allow me to in the way I would have wanted


[2:14 PM]
So, I see how us both had to make compromsises


[2:14 PM]
anna I have felt guilty for how I've treated a specific person in my life who wanted a relationship with my daughter, but due to extreme fear and self-interest I almost ruined the possibility of that relationship happening - and THEN I refused to see it/admit it to myself and let it go.

[2:14 PM]
sunettedimensions but, for some reason


[2:14 PM]
a weird part of me

[2:14 PM]
put it ALL ON ME

[2:14 PM]
and I felt guilty for a long time

[2:14 PM]
'Until one day

[2:14 PM]
marjo Sometimes I feel guilty when I have tasks to do and I procrastinate and then I block myself even more by the feeling of guilt.


[2:14 PM]
anna @sunettedimensions are you Sunette or Victoria?


[2:14 PM]
tormod I felt guilt /like a failure - when i failed or gave up on managing to create a online hangout.

[2:14 PM]
sunettedimensions I went to him and asked forgiveness for not being able to do for him and support him in the way I wanted to


[2:15 PM]
anna Hey T. If you'd ever like support with it, let me know.

[2:16 PM]
sunettedimensions and he showed me that it was BOTH our responsibilities, we can't predict life, we have to create other ways, drop the guilt and see WHAT ELSE we can do or WHAT ELSE we can pursue in the meantime as OTHER AVENUES to explore that will eventually lead us to BOTH our "dreams"


[2:16 PM]
kims I walked past a homeless man today that had been beaten up in the street and I felt extreme annoyance and guilt that I couldnt help him

[2:16 PM]
tormod it made my world collaps thinking i cant do annything - i am just a mess... thanks @anna point taken to heart


[2:17 PM]
sunettedimensions SOmetimes, GUILT can TRAP you into thinking there is ONLY ONE WAY


[2:17 PM]
ONLY ONE SOLUTION

[2:17 PM]
garbrielle i then realized it is nature and that i did consider the life of the fly and helping it, it died anyway and so i was ok with not killing it, like not being so hard on myself cause i would have helped if i could no matter the species, i have built that equality that i do see the life in others great and small and that is cool for me


[2:17 PM]
sunettedimensions ONLY ONE PATH

[2:17 PM]
and if you failed you're a failure

[2:17 PM]
kims then I went into work and reacted badly to a colleague, and then I realised that I was not assisting any change in this world by being this way and I then felt guilty again

[2:17 PM]
sunettedimensions when this is NOT TRUE

[2:17 PM]
viktorpersson I feel guilty when I only give the cats dry food in the mornings, because I feel it is too much of a hazzle to give them wet food as well


[2:17 PM]
valentin.rozman I am also currently experiencing some strange tooth pain that is coming and going in intervals. I went to the doctor and she said that my teeth look just fine. One tooth has become very sensitive to temperature change. Last time when I had a session with Andrea she said that it is a mental origin. So I wonder how this tooth pain relates to my process and what should I do about it.


[2:17 PM]
sunettedimensions When the both of us relooked at the life and selves we're creating, there are other paths, that may take longer yes


[2:17 PM]
kimamourette that's fascinating Sunette, I am going through that exact same experience in relation to Paul - feeling guilty because I think/believe I have not done enough to support him in his life-path. I like the point of asking him for forgiveness, because I have been hiding the guilt and dealing with it on my own rather than just being honest and open about it


[2:18 PM]
viktorpersson Though apparently they do not eat the wet food

[2:18 PM]
lol


[2:18 PM]
sunettedimensions but the paths we create so far has been rewarding in their own way


[2:18 PM]
kims lol viktorpersson I can relate..lol

[2:18 PM]
sunettedimensions not the way we expected lol

[2:18 PM]
but rewarding

[2:19 PM]
I would say @kimamourette that is showing there is another way to be walked,you may not know why now - but will in time to come

[2:19 PM]
randy so, you resolved your guilt sunettedimensions simply by communication

[2:19 PM]
tormod yea @sunettedimensions i feel that way with bugs that are hurt from me not caring enough, rushing or stressing and carrying them out side, where there will die.... not speaking up to snail killers etc... feeling guilt for the smallest among us

[2:19 PM]
yoganb In a moment where I was tired, distracted, and emotional, I forgot to do something very minor, and it led to a series of events that was extremely unfortunate for someone else. I felt very guilty and blamed myself, staying stuck in the guilt and pain, thinking that if only I hadn't made that minor mistake this wouldn't have happened. I remember at the time that the suggestion was to focus on changing, solution and learning, because consequences will happen because I still have a mind and I am still walking process. So staying in the guilt didn't make sense. I need to move on, change and learn.


[2:19 PM]
sunettedimensions @randy forgiving the guilt, looking at creating other ways / paths in the meantime


[2:19 PM]
anna Yes

[2:20 PM]
kimamourette and yes the point of guilt making you perceive that there is only one path and only one way, I can totally see that not just in relation to Paul's path but even with developing QCK as a business. I have been trying to do things the way I was doing them before I started my new job and that just hasnt been working. I've been staring blind onto only doing it that one way and been feeling so guilty about not being able to make that work that i havent even considered looking at changing it up so that it fits into my new life

[2:22 PM]
sunettedimensions Well said @kimamourette

[2:22 PM]
kimamourette Thanks @sunettedimensions that is a point of understanding I need to embrace for sure in relation to this guilt programming

[2:22 PM]
kims I have realised that I was just doing forgiveness on the guilt but missing one vital point of my commitment to change within it

[2:22 PM]
tormod Today I realize the poison with relating... from re-listeing to the 2nd SUN- SEN recording. i am learning

[2:23 PM]
sunettedimensions So, what would everyone say we do in the moment we recognize GUILT, we FEEL BAD, we FEEL WE SHOULD HAVE?

[2:23 PM]
kims so I was staying in the guilt without anything changing

[2:23 PM]
viktorpersson Yes

[2:23 PM]
kimamourette yes

[2:23 PM]
anna This is a really important point @kimamourette that I see we often miss - when a situation for example changes, or when we simply have changed, but there's some aspect that we try to fit into an old idea about ourselves or our lives.

[2:24 PM]
tormod yea just cover it up, ignore it cause I feel like i am on a dead end street

[2:24 PM]
anna Embracing the 'bad' I have done - very important. I have to be able to SEE/MEET myself in it with open arms to be able to forgive myself / give myself back to myself / stand up from it.


[2:24 PM]
kimamourette yes @anna I wasn't even aware that I was doing it so rigidly. Only realized it now lol


[2:24 PM]
sunettedimensions For me, looking back - if I felt that with seeing guilt so clearly now - I'd slow myself down, write it out / share with my partner and go: alright - this /that way did not work, I am not responsible alone. Let me COMMUNICATE what I am going through and we / I find or create a solution together


[2:24 PM]
viktorpersson A common experience for me is a form of guilt/fear – that arise when I have missed something or made a mistake – especially at my work – and I have practiced changing this by firstly – not going into that guilt/fear – and then secondly immediately analyzing the event, looking at causes, and the remedies, so that I can change the point in the future


[2:25 PM]
randy we have to Stop and Look at it @sunettedimensions

[2:25 PM]
anna Yeah lol @kimamourette - that's how those things are learned, at first only in hindsight, but then you can start flagging it and stop it in the process.

[2:25 PM]
sunettedimensions How'd you practically do that @randy?

[2:26 PM]
Can you give an example of stop and an example of looking at it @randy?

[2:26 PM]
tormod to know/understand everything is to forgive : everything

[2:26 PM]
randy I was feeling guilty for not completing a project and that my not doing it was going to put some work on another... so, I looked at it and realized that had legitimately not had time to do it but, if the opportunity came up, that I could still get my part done

[2:26 PM]
sunettedimensions Absolutely @kimamourette and @anna once we see and recognize, we should smile and celebrate to be able to figure the damn thing out and change it!

[2:27 PM]
garbrielle yes same @Victor, learning from the mistake and make provisions and solutions for when it comes again, and also caring for myself by not being so harsh realizing i am changing myself to the best of my ability even though its not apparent in a more visual way for lack of better words

[2:27 PM]
randy out of the blue, I got an unplanned day off, and took that opportunity to go finish it.


[2:27 PM]
kims to not take it personally

[2:27 PM]
sunettedimensions Nice @randy!

[2:28 PM]
tormod i can typicaly ask myself what would this or that (...) destonian do in my shoes... that gives perspective.. realizing this here..now..cool

[2:28 PM]
kimamourette I do see how the togetherness point, as in realizing I am not alone in it, will definitely assist with 'unlocking' my knotted stomach as the guilt and how communicating with my partner, aside from also addressing it in writing and self-forgiveness, will assist a lot


[2:28 PM]
kims I used to feel guilty for resting on my day off and not doing any chores, but I realised that if I push myself it is possible to do both, to rest and work and enjoy both....

[2:29 PM]
anna Yes I had such a moment today where I pulled a point through I'd been refusing to change within myself and I was like "alright, let's do this" Did SF in the car (with Lora staring at me lol cause I speak SF in English) and then finally brought the point up, it is like having a nice burb that's been stuck that you finally release lol


[2:29 PM]
viktorpersson Cool @garbrielle – yes I also find that its important to let go of being harsh – and many times the mistakes I make are because of inexperience, or I have genuinely pushed myself to do my best – yet still the mistake was made


[2:29 PM]
ida yes cool @kimamourette

[2:29 PM]
sunettedimensions Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yes @kimamourette soooooooooooooo important

[2:30 PM]
With guilt, we ODDLY sometimes feel like we should SUFFER in it alone

[2:30 PM]
tormod yeey.... relationship

[2:30 PM]
sunettedimensions Like a SELF PUNISHMENT of sorts :disappointed:

[2:30 PM]
Ugh, HORRIBLE

[2:30 PM]
I mean seriously

[2:30 PM]
anna Another point you can perhaps look at @kimamourette - is that there's no one putting pressure on you, that no one is saying you HAVE to do this business, it is YOUR CREATION and so it is totally up to you how/when/why/where - which also means that it is organic and flexible, because it is part of you/grown from you, like a baby.

[2:30 PM]
kims I am getting better at telling myself that I am not alone in xyz and that everyone makes mistakes and that is ok, there is no use in beating myslef up in guilt because it achieves nothing that is assisting to me

[2:31 PM]
anna Yes that is horrible - and man, how many people don't suffer in silence?

[2:31 PM]
sunettedimensions with honouring and respecting yourself - you would not allow self punishment, but immediately forgivem, find a solution and change


[2:31 PM]
So, it does open the other point of asking

[2:31 PM]
kimamourette lol yeah, rather beating up on ourselves than to ask for forgiveness and in so doing, being open and honest about what we've been dealing with within ourselves

[2:31 PM]
kims a co worker said to me today, we all do that and I felt better about something that I was punishing myself for in guilt

[2:31 PM]
adam within the guilt - as a pattern from the past - it is for me in an experience here and there a reminder of these old patterns ways of being that I grew up in - and the solution has been not just simply 'self acceptance' or 'love' or something like that but to find some point of anchorage in me that is real to me, and see it how it worked within the family constructs

[2:31 PM]
sunettedimensions why we do ALLOW ourselves to suffer in guilt

[2:31 PM]
tormod oh well i talk to myself alot... and it helps

[2:31 PM]
sunettedimensions alone

[2:31 PM]
for SO LONG

[2:32 PM]
anna What do you say to yourself that helps @tormod?

[2:32 PM]
sunettedimensions torturing ourselves

[2:32 PM]
What is MISSING

[2:32 PM]
viktorpersson pleasure? hehe

[2:32 PM]
tormod aaany bannaanay thing

[2:32 PM]
lol

[2:32 PM]
sunettedimensions in our self relationship

[2:32 PM]
kims self love, and a belief that we are worthy

[2:32 PM]
sunettedimensions Why do we not IMMEDIATEY FORGIVE


[2:32 PM]
FIND A SOLUTION

[2:32 PM]
LET THE SELF PUNISHMENT GO

[2:32 PM]
GOODNESS PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[2:32 PM]
ida yes that is definitely a belief of mine @sunettedimensions, but could this be like a polar opposite to blame and wanting to push the responsibility only onto another? like they coexist? but then again here, I go into guilt for having the blame.. and again looping into being stuck at the same point

[2:32 PM]
tormod often i find new words - and to stimulate/occupy my mind

[2:32 PM]
viktorpersson insufficient IQ


[2:32 PM]
kims self responsibility and self honesty

[2:32 PM]
anna LOL

[2:32 PM]
sunettedimensions This is proving

[2:33 PM]
we are not LIVING WORDS

[2:33 PM]
kimamourette suffering in guilt, is one of our middle names as humanity i'd say lol

[2:33 PM]
sunettedimensions Instead of forgiving and changing

[2:33 PM]
We want to try and FIX and MAKE UP FOR

[2:33 PM]
garbrielle yes

[2:33 PM]
tormod it is done ...we only have to walk it

[2:34 PM]
sunettedimensions So, with each one having a look at your signature of guilt

[2:34 PM]
anna Yes @sunettedimensions and COVER UP

[2:34 PM]
kims tormod - it is like the NIKE add, JUST DO IT lol

[2:34 PM]
sunettedimensions what words would you say are you NOT YET REDEFINING AND PRACTISING TO LIVE???

[2:34 PM]
anna and DENY lol

[2:34 PM]
randy we've been trained to be ashamed of ourselves... I can remember as a child being sent to my room to THINK ABOUT what I had done wrong... so, basically being told to go feel guilty for a while

[2:34 PM]
yoganb We have been the Living-Dead Words (zombies get it?) haha

[2:35 PM]
kims sunettedimensions,...were you just on my chat with cerise lol

[2:35 PM]
anna What would be an appropriate word to explain the ability to see "what belongs to who/what I am responsible for and what I am not"?

[2:35 PM]
randy then, seeking the approval of my parents, would try to "make up for it"

[2:35 PM]
sunettedimensions lol @kims No

[2:35 PM]
yet, the Portal is everywhere lol

[2:35 PM]
anna you were there in spiritus :wink:

[2:35 PM]
sunettedimensions connected to everything

[2:35 PM]
kims this is an exact point we discussed lol

[2:35 PM]
ida embrace, acceptance, recognition, letting go

[2:35 PM]
sunettedimensions all the time

[2:35 PM]
on all levels

[2:36 PM]
kimamourette hmm a word that comes up is 'togetherness', where I am too inclined to keep things inside and create a bubble of aloneness


[2:36 PM]
tormod that reminds me of Nietche and "just doubt it" lol ... but nike has that body positive point @kims

[2:36 PM]
sunettedimensions @kimamourette - if another were doing that, what would you say to them as advice

[2:36 PM]
kims Just do it !

[2:36 PM]
viktorpersson yes @randy – its a contraproductive way to handle it – same as prisons – nobody learns anything – would be better to say now lets go and discuss solutions!

[2:36 PM]
kims it is as simple as that really

[2:37 PM]
sunettedimensions @kims you'd be surprised as to how many ppl are going through similar points

[2:37 PM]
randy indeed @viktorpersson


[2:37 PM]
kims @sunettedimensions - yes seems so

[2:37 PM]
tormod medical words, i like then also latin words

[2:37 PM]
anna Accountability is one for me

[2:37 PM]
tormod spanish is cool and seams practical to know

[2:37 PM]
kimamourette i would say "you may think and feel you are alone but you are not. We're all going through the same or similar things and we are here to support each other and together find a way out of the issue into creating a solution"


[2:37 PM]
sunettedimensions @kims seems, seams - we're all seamed together

[2:38 PM]
Agreed @kimamourette

[2:38 PM]
kims @sunettedimensions -- oh yes I like that

[2:38 PM]
ingrids Yes I also recognize of keeping it within me and trying to solve it alone

[2:38 PM]
sunettedimensions lol

[2:38 PM]
when I told Bernard once

[2:38 PM]
tormod to ground theory into practicality.... hah !

[2:38 PM]
sunettedimensions I WILL DO IT ALONE

[2:38 PM]
kims in the rich tapestry that is life

[2:38 PM]
sunettedimensions he looked at me straight in the eyes

[2:38 PM]
laughed out loud

[2:38 PM]
kims @sunettedimensions lol

[2:39 PM]
sunettedimensions and said "uhuh - I'll still be waiting for you to ask"

[2:39 PM]
joekou wait.... so... i'm not the only one that feels like a failure and keeps it to himself? *eyes widen with realization*


[2:39 PM]
ingrids It has also to do with a point of control, keeping the control on the solution and outcome

[2:39 PM]
randy lol joekou

[2:39 PM]
anna lol when I told you @sunettedimensions once that I was done living in fear you also looked at me like: "hmmmm are you sure about that?" lol

[2:39 PM]
kims @joekou we are with you buddy lol

[2:39 PM]
sunettedimensions "you can try if you want, all your existence, put me up for it - I will meet you somewhere in infinity"


[2:39 PM]
garbrielle lol Joe!

[2:39 PM]
sunettedimensions lol @anna yeah - ause there are so many dimensions of fear

[2:39 PM]
kimamourette but yes that point of aloneness, of isolating/separating ourselves, suffering in silence and carrying the burden of our issues and things we go through alone seems to be our default way of handling and doing things. Like something inside us says that's how it needs to be even though it doesn't actually make sense

[2:40 PM]
tormod "cerebellum" = such a wondeful "thing"

[2:40 PM]
ida @sunettedimensions did you see my question above?

[2:41 PM]
kimamourette lol @sunettedimensions

[2:41 PM]
anna Ok so one word I see could be supported for me to live to specifically support with guilt is CONNECTEDNESS

[2:41 PM]
sunettedimensions @ida I did not

[2:41 PM]
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh @anna and @kimamourette should listen to weather today


[2:41 PM]
kims and PRACTICE and PATIENCE


[2:41 PM]
anna To remember my connection to all and everything. It tends to help me to 'raise' my perspective from the personal to the existential for example, but also to remember how the other person is a part of me, and in general the deeper connections going on within the point.



[2:42 PM]
sunettedimensions interesting dimensions of separation and oneness / connectedness / togetherness opened up


[2:42 PM]
anna Oh cool @sunettedimensions - will do!

[2:42 PM]
kimamourette will do

[2:42 PM]
sunettedimensions ALL gtg for the eve

[2:42 PM]
THANK YOU so so so much for being here

[2:42 PM]
for sharing in detail as you have

[2:42 PM]
to support so many

[2:42 PM]
kims thank you all @sunettedimensions

[2:42 PM]
sunettedimensions We will see everyone again

[2:42 PM]
adam guilt also with the one against the many and many against the one polarity

[2:42 PM]
kimamourette thank you so much for the support @sunettedimensions and everyone here!

[2:43 PM]
viktorpersson thanks!

[2:43 PM]
miranda Thanks all, bye

[2:43 PM]
garbrielle thanks all! bye!

[2:43 PM]
viktorpersson bye!

[2:43 PM]
randy ah yes, adam

[2:43 PM]
kimamourette my stomach actually feels better just from the things that opened up in chat here


[2:43 PM]
tormod words that can be in the ball park of dominating, controlling, ruling, demanding, craving, superior, chief, emperor, dictator, king, desire, confiscating, corruption even - also popular words from international politics facinate me but still scare me abit...

[2:43 PM]
sunettedimensions Nice @kimamourette

[2:43 PM]
marjo thanks all, byebye

[2:43 PM]
randy cool @kimamourette

[2:44 PM]
sunettedimensions @ida can you send me viber with question pls

[2:44 PM]
will respond lady

[2:44 PM]
thanks so much

[2:44 PM]
tormod like words from finance and law ! they sound so heavy lol ...

[2:44 PM]
sunettedimensions Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee alll

[2:44 PM]
valentin.rozman I just realised how I see realisation that I have been selfish as the act of feeling sorry for myself which I do not want to experience because this was the pattern that eventually directed my mother towards the suicide. So it is like I do want to experience and weakness and remain strong.

[2:45 PM]
ingrids Thanks all

[2:45 PM]
ida ok @sunettedimensions

[2:45 PM]
thanks all

[2:45 PM]
anna interesting @valentin.rozman

[2:46 PM]
ida yes very cool @kimamourette I agree

[2:46 PM]
adam bye everyone

[2:46 PM]
carlton Thanks all bye

[2:47 PM]
randy Thanks everyone... see you tomorrow

[2:47 PM]
kimamourette interesting @valentin.rozman I've often found that the resistance to experience certain things and trying to 'stay strong' in the face of those experiences would lead me to break down eventually because the 'strength' was based on reaction. In a way I was just perpetuating what I was resisting by not realizing that real strength exists within unconditional self-honesty and just being real with myself about what I am really experiencing deep down without judgment


[2:48 PM]
randy That's awesome @kimamourette

[2:49 PM]
yoganb Within my family dynamics and relationships, whenever someone does something wrong/bad the other families say that person's name in a specific tonality as if expressing shock and disapproval, and that I can see leading to a reaction of guilt within me. This same signature of guilt that I have carried within my self-relationship. The reverse side is the signature of enjoying putting someone down, and disapproving what someone did, and saying they were wrong/bad. Doing that to another would make me feel good. I notice in family its like I/we have permission to do anything, the worst of the worst because you are "family," and it becomes normal/accepted. There's no real accountability for words/actions. It's funny how things work in the family structure.


[2:49 PM]
valentin.rozman Yes @anna and @kimamourette I will have to do something to overcome this resistance and move through the points.


[2:49 PM]
Thanks all and bye :slightly_smiling_face:

[2:50 PM]
randy good example yoganb... 'tis quite the fuckup what we do within our own family


[2:50 PM]
kimamourette maybe a good place to start is to work with the fear of ending up like your mother, which is what leads you to fear experiencing what she experienced and thus fear your own mind



[2:51 PM]
randy but, no one from outside the family would be allowed to treat you like that

[2:51 PM]
valentin.rozman I will do that @kimamourette, thanks



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