Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Share and ask your moments and experiences in random, unpredictable, sudden moments that happened to you - you'd like to understand. Whether it be during a discussion with someone and not understanding why certain thoughts / behaviours came up in you or another. Not understanding another's facial expression or even your own when looking in the mirror etc. So, this thread is dedicated to the everyday life moments we WONDER about but never ask.
jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 20 Jul 2017, 23:07

I did thought too that I would learn something from the interviews but I literally knew everything about them, as if I myself had created them, it didn't feel good to give away my money for nothing... so I hope my money is apreciated and the people that owns it know its value
just felt like sharing my experience



Marlen
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Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby Marlen » 20 Jul 2017, 23:19

Hey Raul, if you truly find no support in them now, I suggest then going straight into the application, to live the changes that you see you can apply and live in your reality.

An extra note here on the perception towards the interviews. I've listened to almost every audio on eqafe and no matter how many years I've been walking this process, no matter how 'similar' the topics may be, I always find them supportive, even if I am aware of the main principles, it's always nurturing to find the different ways to approach my own process and the assistance that I can at the same time extend to many more.

So in your case if nothing seems 'relevant' to you now, leave them, then in some time re-listen to them to see if you see or hear anything different.

And in relation to money, simple suggestion: if you find yourself having a problematic relationship to money, its value and the perceived 'loss' you have with it, then quite simple, assess well before you decide to buy anything for that matter, there's no point in coming back with a sense of loss and recrimination about a decision you took to purchase them.
Being unconditional in giving and receiving is part of this process. We/the people participating here are not being paid to do this, we do it out of understanding of what this process is about. Therefore, if you find yourself having a problem with some of your money to support the people that facilitate the core of the desteni team, I'd suggest you then re-consider what you have gotten through Desteni in exchange, completely 'for free' - like thousands of videos, blogs, this forum in itself - and how you are making a big deal about the Eqafe interviews which by the way, are of course a way to support Desteni and keep all of the websites - and people that are actively running them - alive.

You have gotten more than enough perspectives in the other thread under eqafe.com section here on this forum, so suggest you rather make an informed decision rather than coming back here every time to regret having done something. I/we people can only suggest you hear stuff, but the decision is entirely taken on and lived by yourself.



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 21 Jul 2017, 00:38

I appreciate your perspective, but I was in no way trying to blame or something for commenting what happened to me
it happens to me a lot that I buy interviews that are not usefull for me, so I feel like I wish that I could know that what I am buying is support, that simple, I am not gonna be entirely fine with spending money for nothing, because I don't consider it fair, if I buy a product I want to by a product and not buy nothing, that is commom sence, not a possesive ego with money
You are right about seeing perspectives, relistening the interviews, learning to appreciate interviews I find nothing new about, but I prefer to focus my money on interviews that can really help me, anyway I don't need you to tell me that there are a lot of free advantages I enjoy for the money I spend and the money I spend for no reason, so don't worry about my apreciation of what I receive
thanks
Last edited by jazzybeard on 21 Jul 2017, 00:57, edited 1 time in total.



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 21 Jul 2017, 00:53

you know maybe if this had happened to you you wouldn't have commented anything, but the money I have is important for me in this moment of my life, so I felt that it was important for me to share it that is all, I will listen the interviews very closely so I learn everything I can from them, thanks for your concern



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 21 Jul 2017, 13:53

Maybe I did have some emotional charge with the feeling of not receiving anything, my mind thought that it was purchasing something because of the value in money, and when I received so much less support than in interviews that cost 1 euro I got triggered in the emotion, I feel like I would love to receive exacly what I am expending, that for me is an equal and balanced trade, but with all of this everything is so subjetive... I would not have spent so much money on it if I really knew what they were about...
I really have to look at my relationship with money, the fact that it allows me to for example have a good guitar makes me possesive with it, I will take a look at it when I finish what I am working on right now
Sorry Marlen that I created a conflict between me and you
I will use the rest of this topic to share what I find in the playing a concert in front of a lot people situation



Marlen
Posts: 4090
Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 20:16
Contact:

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby Marlen » 21 Jul 2017, 18:13

Cool Raul, it's actually good you open up these points, I can relate to the 'relationship to money' and reactions, and so walking through that will assist you in being able to not only make effective decisions in your life in relation to money, but also how you relate to others through and with it, which is actually very linked to virtually anything we do, live, say, wear, eat and the rest of it, so you can also consider opening up some other writings in terms of your relationship with money indeed as self-support.

Thanks for sharing.



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 05 Aug 2017, 20:15

This is an update of my process

I have noticed how I don't have to force myself to dance or "feel", if I can't enjoy it's much more better that I just stop dancing instead of doing it in separation, it's a separation that creates conflict, the conflict of I have to do this and that and let go and feel the music but I don't feel like. So the answer is, in the moments I must stop giving energy to the show I will completely stop, even if I am playing while being solid as a rock without any emotion, and that leads me to unity, honesty, and then I suddenly receive magical mysterious energy to dance and feel from "I don't care what I am doing, or I am accepting the good and the bad, and thereforce I am free and I can dance and not create a conflict in the moments when the energy of me in the show drops".
I have also noticed a feedback with the public, it's like sometimes I look at the people paying attention to the show and enjoying it and I feel energized, like if even if I am tired I can do a lot of things because it's a very important moment.
Also I have noticed how if I am able to stand absolutely and completely one and equal with 1 single person, I am able to do it with a big crowd of people, people think that what makes them nervious is the unusual ammount of people, but at least for me I have found that the number of people means nothing for me, what really means something is my relationship and communication with one human being.
Each time I get more experience in this, I enjoy the solos more, they become the absolute funny moments of the show where when I have noticed, I have already had an amazing experience in every aspect in that moment in my existence. It's like I don't care about anything, I am gonna try this at my 100%.
When I start a concert, I am one person, normally one and equal because it's what my goal with my mind is, and my goal with these concerts is that I start the concert being this, and I end being the very same thing. What I find is that in every concert I am able to be one and equal for more time, to be that for the whole concert would mean I can controll the whole situation within the context of oness and equality, an this is a so subjetive experience that is very easy to lose touch with oness and equality. Stronge subjetives experiences are nice for me because they allow me to make a big progress in my process.
I must say also that in general I love this job, I end the concerts happy and with my limits tested and then they pay me so much and it's like... really? Maybe I was preprogrammed to have this job, but it's beautiful and funny.



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 08 Aug 2017, 11:23

Okay I've had enough mind for a lifetime, I am gonna take the reins, I am gonna open up, I am gonna really enjoy my job, I am gonna be full of the joy I am stopping, I am gonna connect with my friends and the audience, I am gonna grow stop having fear and do what I know I have to do to grow up, no words are needed for that, only inner growth and absolute fredom from my mind, goodbye mind it's time to go, cya



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 12 Aug 2017, 19:51

So I did a lot of sentences with this conflict. And it was all about one single sentence, dance with fredom, and play with fredom. 1 existential sentence and I could solve the conflict, but instead I created a lot of paths, that even if they were smart and interesting they were not what I was looking for. I don't have any problem being sincere as water, I won't ever judge myself again. When I was in those moments, becoming a dancing cloud that creates charges of beauty like a hero, I could see one core point of my mind, that was seeing my body and myself as unworthy. Last night I was very free I must say that shows are an amazing way for me to self-growth



jazzybeard
Posts: 77
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Playing a concert in front of a lot of people

Postby jazzybeard » 19 Aug 2017, 03:12

In one concert I just let all resistance go, and I had a moment of conection with the singer that changed me for good, I never imagined that that would happen, it was like if the song exploded and we both were playing and singing in the same intensity as the energy we were feeling, it was so brief, so brilliant, once I felt that I absolutely know the path and my concerts have changed very much. I will in the future write about the nature of this energy. Right now I can only say, that I felt PURE LOVE, it felt so right and beautiful, and I want to explore more of this energy, I want to discover this mystery, it's something I can't explain, since then I know that this is the best profession for me, this is what I want do, and I no longer have fear, I am ready to express freely, I created this whole post because if I was a musician and I had problems playing in front of a lot of people, this post would help me very much, and it has helped me aswell sharing my process
So, the reward of being 100% free in a concert is heaven, people love you, and you love you and your group and the people, so if you have any resistance while playing, just stop judging yourself, stop thinking about others, do what you enjoy, share and enjoy with the people, see the great opportunity you have in front of you!! If you are open it can change you forever, I will someday write about the nature of this energy, because I like it very much, and there is something inside of a human being while being the center of attention of a large crowd that feeds you, and that has an immense power
This is the end of the post, I found what I was looking for




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