Facing Limitation in Relationships

Share and ask your moments and experiences in random, unpredictable, sudden moments that happened to you - you'd like to understand. Whether it be during a discussion with someone and not understanding why certain thoughts / behaviours came up in you or another. Not understanding another's facial expression or even your own when looking in the mirror etc. So, this thread is dedicated to the everyday life moments we WONDER about but never ask.
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tylersr
Posts: 376
Joined: 18 Jul 2011, 22:49

Facing Limitation in Relationships

Post by tylersr »

I've been exploring the point of sex and relationships lately and something curious keeps happening. When I am in the presence of a woman, it's like I am immediately thrust into this position where I can see that I could create an agreement with this woman, or at least move myself towards that. The thing is, there is no analysis going on. It's like some force is watching me and says, oh, he's going to approach a woman, let's set up the situation so that he receives the suggestion that he could go into an agreement with this person. And then I get there, and it's like, yeah, every fiber in my being is screaming: "Initiate! Initiate!" (an agreement). Within the moment, it also feels right, like if I actually did initiate within the context of moving towards an agreement with this person I've never met, I wouldn't regret it/everything would be ok/it would be best for all.

But then I shut it down and afterwards I have time to consider what just happened. And then I realize that I have not gotten to know this person at all, I don't know if she's actually a type of person who is more/less compatible with me than another, but within the moment it seems right. I account this to the quantum physical process trying to speed things up, where it's sorting of fudging things to try and get me to take the bait and enter into an agreement quickly so my process can move on. Perspectives?
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viktor
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Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 20:50

Re: Facing Limitation in Relationships

Post by viktor »

I would look at why you are asking this question. Let us assume that it is the quantum physical that is attempting to speed up your process by pushing you into a relationship, would that in anyway change your experience of yourself in relation to this pattern? Would it empower you to make a change in your life with regards to this pattern?
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Maite
Posts: 575
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 19:08

Re: Facing Limitation in Relationships

Post by Maite »

Consider that an agreement is not something you are pushed into, it's a decision you make. If you feel you are in some way led/pushed/driven into a certain action by an experience, then you're not the directive principle in that moment, your mind is. So, that is always an easy cross-reference you can use by asking yourself: am I moving myself or am I being moved? Am I directive or am I following an experience?
Marlen
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Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 20:16
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Re: Facing Limitation in Relationships

Post by Marlen »

tylersr wrote: I account this to the quantum physical process trying to speed things up, where it's sorting of fudging things to try and get me to take the bait and enter into an agreement quickly so my process can move on. Perspectives?
I'll add here to be careful of interpreting or associating an urge that might exist within you in relation to having sex or creating a relationship as 'something else' being the directive principle or 'pushing you' to anything. As Maite said, if you're not directing in every step of the way, then it's you as the accumulation of desires or ideas about relationships - or agreements - that you are imposing onto 'opportunities' in reality.

Remember that there's nothing in control of ourselves other than ourselves, lol. So even if it is 'your mind' it's still you, we simply have to decide who we decide to be in the totality of our lives, our decisions, our deeds - so as to not create a 'separation' in relation to yourself as well.
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