Postponement – Back-Chat Self Corrections – An Artists Journey To Life: Day 165
http://anartistsjourneytolife.wordpress ... e-day-165/
This is a continuation of the following blogs
BackChatAttack - Self Forgiveness - An Artists Journey To Life: Day 164
The Resistance Before I Write - Postponement Character - An Artists Journey To Life: Day 163
Postponement Character - Imagination Dimension - Self Corrections - An Artists Journey To Life: Day 162
Imagination Dimension - Postponement Character - Imagining Myself as Changed - An Artists Journey To Life: Day 161
Postponement Character - Thought Dimension - Sabotaging My Effectiveness : An Artists Journey To Life: Day 160
Postponement Character - Fear Dimension - An Artists Journey To Life: Day 159
Self Corrections on Back-Chat Dimension
I can’t do this
I commit myself to ensure that I actually practically investigate the points/tasks I am working with and no more accepting and allowing myself to just go with the back-chat within me of and as “I can’t do this” where I simply go with that route and just drop the task/point I am faced with. I see that it would be more effective to look at the point/task practically to see if I am in fact able to do it/walk it and also to ensure that my “decision” is based on Actual Physical Feedback, where for instance in my back-chat I will agree with my back-chat without actually testing the point for myself in my reality through by applying myself consistently within the point for the necessary amount of time to determine if the point is feasible or not, particularly when I am “not certain” if I am able to walk the point or not and thus within this Aligning my Decision Making on Practical Doing instead of back-chat that that I “automatically accept” without in fact investigating a point/task practically physically with my own 2 hands.
I’m to tired
I commit myself to assisting and supporting myself to not “go into” or “participate” with the back-chat statement of/as “I am too tired” as I see/realize/understand that this is a point of Self Manipulation that I have accepted and allowed myself to use and thus Limit myself from actually walking effectively in every moment, in being able to move myself into a practical physical application of effective self support where I am in fact walking in my utmost potential in every moment, particularly within my writing/reading process in relation to working with myself within the Desteni Material where I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility in various moments during my day, particularly in the morning and evenings where I am more willing to “accept” this statement of “I am too tired” as ‘viable’ back-chat. And so thus I commit myself to see/realize/understand the amount of opportunities I “give up on me” in, due to using/accepting this back-chat statement “I am too tired”
I don’t have it in me
I commit myself to investigate what it is that I would rather be doing when and as I speak the back-chat statement “I don’t have it in me” and within this to investigate the wants/needs/desires that I have within me when I speak such a back-chat statement as the “trigger point” for me to stop what I am doing and “do what it is that ‘I’d like to be doing’” or to simply not even start the task before me, and so thus here to also investigate and understand the relationship my ‘postponement character’ has in terms of the wants/needs/desires that I as my postponement character have accepted as having more value than actually supporting me to do/stand as what is best for all which is what is best for me.
I see/realize/understand that I have over the years abused this statement of “I am exhausted” where I have spoken these words inside myself when I have not in fact been “exhausted. Also I see how the nature of using such a statement of “I am exhausted” is more to stop myself from taking responsibility for myself in a practical way and is thus used as a point of manipulation where in speaking this back-chat I do so in attempt to “make it real” and so I commit myself to when and as I see myself speaking or wanting to speak the back-chat “I am exhausted” within myself that I immediately stop and simply focus on the practical task at hand here in and as the physical. In this I assist and support myself to stay “out of the mind” and Align myself to Practical Physical Living which I see is not supported by me speaking the back-chat “I am exhausted” within myself which I see is in fact me as the mind speaking such a statement and is thus oriented to the mind which I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as for so long where now I am Assisting and Supporting myself to orient me/ my living to and as the Physical where I see that this statement I have spoken to myself through the years of “Im Exhausted” can no more be trusted as it was spoken in relation to and understood within the context of the Mind which I am now assisting and supporting myself to stop.
There is no way I can do that tonight
I commit myself to assist and support myself to Align Myself to Doing as a Physical Direct Doing within and during my Day, and when it comes to walking my practical Self Responsibilities related to process such as writings, readings ect… that I Direct/Move myself immediately in and as the physical in and as Breath as a practical application where I am simply “cutting out” the entire back-chat that ensures within me in relation to walking my practical daily tasks. So the point here is to instead of even going into my back-chat or when and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to give space to my back-chat to exist within me and I stop immediately and Direct myself at the task/point that I require to direct by simply moving myself in the next step/steps that are required to be physically taken to complete the task at hand.
I will put that off for tonight because I did it last night
I commit myself to assist and support myself to within and as Self Honesty, Identify the practicality of the assessments that I make with regards to my practical scheduling for each night, and to also investigate that “moment” I reach where I decide to “do it tomorrow” and to investigate/see/realize/understand how I have created such a moment/crossroads within myself where I see this kind of “split between 2 worlds” the worlds of “having to do something and wanting to do something” where these 2 worlds are in conflict with each other, and that I have within myself created a kind of management equation to determine what do and how much I do within my day in terms of “practical responsibilities” vs “entertainment” etc.
I don’t need to do that tonight
I commit myself to investigate why and how it is that I have designed myself to not do what is in fact best for me and that when ever I am moving/directing myself in a practical self responsible way that my back-chat kick up and attempt to divert me from Practical Self Responsible Self Direction. Also I commit myself to Will Myself to Remain Stable within Practical Self Responsible Self Direction where when and as I see myself starting to go into such back-chat as for instance “I don’t have to do that tonight” to see/realize/understand that this is pre-programmed back-chat that does NOT support me within Aligning Myself With and Walking Practically Self Responsibly and so I stop participating with such back-chat and assert myself to continue walking/living in a Practical Self Responsible way that is best for all and not accept and allow myself to sabotage my Transformation of myself from “doing exactly what my back-chat suggests” to in fact Directing Myself in a Practical Self Responsible way where I am considering everyone Equally within my Actions, and Doing what is required to be done to Align Myself with what is Best For ALL.
I have done enough
I commit myself to see/realize/understand that to actually challenge myself is Self Supportive and to do this by Living by Principles and Commitments I make to myself within a practical consideration of how I am able to Daily Support myself in a consistent way that I will have an accumulative consequence of Self Support within and as What is best for all.
I commit myself to see/realize/understand that if I in those moments where I speak or want to speak such back-chat as “I have done enough”, Remain Here in and as breath and move myself to apply myself in a way where I am stepping beyond that point of “I have done enough” that I will support myself tremendously to develop my ability/capacity to Remain Here in every breath until I am in fact HERE in every breath, no more accepting and allowing myself to be Directed by Back-Chat to tell/indicate to me what to do and when to do it and who I am within a particular moment scenario.
I will do it tomorrow
I commit myself to see/realize/understand that the back-chat statement of “I will do it tomorrow” is a back-chat statement I speak to myself when and as I am facing resistance within practically applying myself in a self responsible way. And so in such moments, I commit myself to breathe and walk through such resistance points where when I am facing such moments of resistance to instead of “going into my back-chat” to simply practice directing me to Remain HERE in and as the physical in and as breath, in and as Physical Dimension and practice and become Effective and Specific and Skilled at Moving/Living/expressing myself within the physical within and as my/this practical physical reality in a way that is always best for all and Aligned with Supporting Life/Living in Equality and Oneness where I do unto another what I would like done unto me and I give as I would like to receive.
I don’t have enough time
I commit myself to Aligning myself and Directing Myself to Move and Express me immediately and Consistently within the practical tasks I take on. I see, realize and understand that if I keep stopping what I am doing and “thinking about it” by going into my back-chat dimension, that I am essentially wasting time from the perspective that I could in fact actually finish / complete a task in less time if I Discipline myself to walk through tasks from beginning to end without accepting and allowing back-chat to interrupt me and or interfere with my consistent constant application of myself in walking/directing myself through my practical tasks.
And thus I commit myself to practice taking on a task/tasks and walking them from beginning to end straight through in and as breath without unnecessarily stopping in where I will go into back-chat, this is not to say that I will not stop the task or have breaks but is more a point of seeing how I unnecessarily participate within back-chat as I am walking tasks that I could actually walk straight through from beginning to end as a application of self discipline and practical effectiveness.
I don’t want to do this right now
I see/realize/understand that within assisting and supporting myself to transform myself in my application from self sabotage and self abuse to self support that I will have to walk that which “I don’t want to do right now” as I see that I have abused and sabotaged myself within accepting and allowing myself to follow the back-chat statement “I don’t want to this right now” where in I in a way escaped into this statement through by not Directing me to not participate in this statement and actually Directing Myself in a way/in that which I see/realize/understand would be Practical and Self Supportive. And thus I commit myself to no more accept and allow myself to follow a statement that has proven to only support me within self abuse and self sabotage, and to thus instead realign myself with pushing through/directing myself through such a statement and walking that which I see/realize/understand would Practically Support me to become more effective within my Daily Living, but that I had previously accepted and allowed myself to not do for myself due to having accepted and allowed myself to participate and obey the back-chat statement “I don’t want to do that/this right now”
I really don’t feel like it
I see/realize/understand that the back-chat statement “I really don’t feel like it” is based on living according to feeling/energy instead of practical responsibility and thus when and as I see this statement coming up within me I stop and I breath and I remain here in and as Principled Living to assist and support myself to Walk/Live the Principle of and as What is Best for ALL to restore Dignity and Respect to Life, that has been ignored/denied/annihilated by/through the current world of war/suffering/poverty/anger/hatred/racism/ elitism/ egoism/ that we have manifested through by accepting and allowing ourselves to participate with and align our living to the statement of “I don’t really feel like it”
This is too Hard
I commit myself to see/realize/understand that when and as I speak the statement within me “this is too hard” I am actually manipulating myself, and thus I commit myself to when and as I speak the statement or see the statement starting to come up “its to hard” to actually look at the task before me and see if in fact “it is too hard” or if this is simply a point of self manipulation .
Finally – Now I can stop.
I commit myself to when and as I am taking on a task and/or starting a task to ensure that I walk that task consistently from beginning to end, and within to focus on breathing and remaining stable and CONSTANT within my application of myself within the task from beginning to end, and thus direct me to move at a slow consistent constant stable pace step by step, treating each moment and/as each step equal and one the same with the utmost care and attention not deviating from this point of treating each step/moment equal and in this moving myself in a stable constant manner in each and every moment, including the completing/walking of practical tasks/projects/etc.