Aldin's Journey to Life

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Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 30 Aug 2013, 19:00

Day 416 Anger: Neglecting Long Term Consequence for Feeling Better Fast

Within todays writing I am continuing with expanding on the self-forgiveness walked within last days writing (Day 415) on the point of Anger.

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will feel better/good if I give into anger/the energy of anger when I experience it, because I as the mind have accepted and allowed myself to only be oriented/looking for how I can make myself feel better/feel good immediately/as soon as possible, BUT what I as the mind is not aware of is that I am not considering/looking at the LONG-TERM process/impact/effect this point of giving into the anger and feeling immediately better because of that – will have in my life, on me and on others – But that I as the mind am only Looking/Looking For/Aiming for the SHORT-TERM, the IMMEDIATE RELEASE from Discomfort/Not feeling good and within that disregard/not see/not look at/not realize/is not aware/is not considering of the actual CONSEQUENCES in the long term.” – from the writing of day 415

I forgive myself that I as the mind have accepted and allowed myself to orient/focus/tunnel vision only at How I can get the quickest/immediate Energetic RELEASE/Energetic FIX when I experience anger/energies that make me feel ‘negative’ or unpleasant, or energies/emotions/experiences that I do not ‘Like’ or ‘Prefer’, and with that being my Starting-Point/My Relationship to HOW I approach and Respond to Negative Energy within myself such as Emotions, such as Anger – to give-into the Anger when I experience it, for I have found that this is the easiest/most comfortable way to get that quick fix of RELEASING myself from the Unpleasant Experience/Energy/Negative Energy within me and the soonest way get to feel better again.


But, with that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Not see, realize and understand that with that being my starting point/relationship towards Negative Energy/HOW I approach and respond to negative energy/experiences that I do not like or prefer – that I am ONLY looking at/searching for the SHORT TERM IMMEDIATE/QUICK ENERGY FIX/RELEASE to Feel Better as soon as practically possible, and am in that totally disregarding/blacking-out/covering/not considering/not being aware of the LONG TERM effect/impact and consequence this approach/relationship to Negative Energy will have on me, my live, my relationship and others.

I see, realize and understand the importance of working on and changing my relationship/response/approach towards anger and/as ‘who I am’ in relation to Anger/the energy of anger.

With that, I commit myself to work on and change my relationship, response, approach and who I am towards and in relation to Anger/the Energy of Anger – through walking the processes of writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application for it.

I will be going up to here for todays writing. Within the next writing I will utilize the application/tool of Writing to start with looking at and and finding out What / How my Relationship to Anger is, before I proceed with using the application/tool of Self-Forgiveness to take responsibility for it in a practical way and release myself from that relationship, and then proceeding with the application/tool of Self-Corrective and Self-Commitment statements to practically look at and write-out/script/place for myself actual Practical/Livable Self-Corrective APPLICATIONS to Live/Walk/Apply from here/there on to change my relationship to anger in fact, for real where it’s practically physically measurable.

Thank you very much!



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 31 Aug 2013, 17:38

Day 417 Keeping myself stable and self-directive in the storm of anger

Within todays writing I am starting with self-corrective and self-commitment statements for the self-forgiveness walked within the last 3 writings of Day 414, 415 and 416.

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience the desire within my mind to just give into the anger that I am/was experiencing and no longer concern myself about ‘trying’/putting in the effort/self-application to live my self-corrective application/self-correction I established or that I see for the Anger I am/was experiencing within me, because the anger felt overwhelming.” – from the writing of day 414

Self-Corrective Application:

When and as I see and find that I experience DESIRE to Give-Into Anger/the Emotion/Energy of Anger when I experience it, and if, with that desire, I lose the interest and drive/will to put in any effort to remain/keep myself stable and direct myself within and as the anger, and apply self-corrective applications for it – Then I stop and breathe:

I see, realize and understand that I have accepted and allowed myself to have my starting point of keeping myself stable and self-directive, be based on How I feel, within the context that if I feel a certain motivating or empowering way, then I will have the will and drive and determination to move myself and apply self-corrective applications to keep myself stable and self-directive and not participate in anger/energy, with all effort, and that if I would not have that feeling of feeling/experiencing myself empowered and motivated about that, then I will lose my drive, will and determination to keep myself stable and self-directive with all means/effort.


With that realization and understanding, I simply Shift my Awareness/Starting-Point of Why I am/Why to keep myself stable and self-directive, from it being based on Energy/How I feel/Whether or not I FEEL Motivated and Willed to do so – to shift my awareness/starting point to ME/SELF as in being/standing as the Self-Directive Principle and Living Word.

I take a deep in breath, and a deep-out breath: In the out-breath I make that self-movement within myself/my beingness/I move my beingness within and as myself to make that decision and take that action within me/my beingness to UNCONDITIONALLY Let-Go of the Energy/Experience of ‘Losing interest and will to keep myself stable and self-directive’.

I (continue to) breathe and remain HERE. I keep myself stable and self-directive, not accepting or allowing myself to BE DIRECTED BY the Anger/Energy I experience within my MIND, and I utilize any and all practical tools/means/methodologies/applications necessary to assist and support myself to remain stable and SELF-DIRECTIVE and not (end up) abdicate/give my Self-Directive Ability/Power to the Anger/Energy of my MIND.

I commit myself to live, practice and apply the above self-corrective application I scripted for myself, and to observe/be aware of the feedback I get from the physical reality in terms of whether or not the corrective application is effective enough, and to if not – come back to it and specify/change/alter it and test it again in real-time moments of living/applying it, and repeat this process until it is producing the feedback that it works in actually producing a Real self-change within and as me.

I’ll be going up to here for this writing, and continue within my next writing.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 01 Sep 2013, 21:58

Day 418 Pulling myself out of Anger

Within todays writing I am continuing with self-corrective and self-commitment statements for the self-forgiveness walked within the last 3 writings of Day 414, 415 and 416. Todays writing will be a continuation for the self-corrective and self-commitment statements started within last days writing (Day 417), on the following self-forgiveness statement from the writing of day 414.

“I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience the desire within my mind to just give into the anger that I am/was experiencing and no longer concern myself about ‘trying’/putting in the effort/self-application to live my self-corrective application/self-correction I established or that I see for the Anger I am/was experiencing within me, because the anger felt overwhelming.” – from the writing of day 414

Self-Corrective application:

When and as I see and find that I am giving-into anger/energy and am participating in it when anger manifest/rise within my mind, I stop and breathe:

I see, realize and understand that even though I went to the point of giving into the anger/energy and am currently in the position/event/moment of participating in it – it does Not mean that I have to continue, but that I do have the opportunity and ability to reverse that point of participation into non-participation right now, right here, and I see, realize and understand that I can do so in one singular breath and all it takes is a decision on my side.

I continue breathing and focus my awareness/attention extensively and intensely on breathing to assist and support me to stay/remain Here and self-directive/self-moving within/as my beingness and physical body, and not drift off into my mind and into the anger/energy.


I take a deep in-breath and a deep out-breath. In and with the out-breath, I move myself within and as my beingness to unconditionally let-go of the participation in the anger/energy.

With that, I move myself within and as my beingness to unconditionally let-go of the anger/energy.

I keep reminding myself that I will get through any discomfort and difficulty I experience in relation to remaining stable and self-directive and not allowing the anger/energy to be master/directive-principle over me, and that all I need to do is remain decisive and stable and steadfast and dedicated and disciplined and commited in sticking to my breathing and moving myself within/as my beingness and physical body to live the self-correction/self-corrective application.

Then, when and as I have the practical time available to do so, I investigate the anger/energy reaction in my writing and self-forgiveness to clear it.

I commit myself to live the above self-corrective application I scripted/wrote down for myself, in real-time, and come back to it to adjust if necessary.

I commit myself to be the self-directive principle in relation to Anger.

I commit myself to not give up on my journey towards transcending anger, and to push myself to always stand up and continue walking my journey should I fall, until it is done and I am free from the control of anger it has still over me at this moment.

I commit myself to be strict and disciplined and determined within and as myself to not allow myself to justify the existence of anger as an energetic reaction/experience within me and my life.

I commit myself to investigate the point of self-expression as a beingness-expression that anger as an emotion/energy represents, and to practice that self-expression/beingness-expression into perfection and until it’s integrated and amalgamated as one and equal with me.

Alright, I will be going up to here for todays writing and will continue within my next writing.

Thank you for reading!



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 02 Sep 2013, 22:43

Day 419 First Day of School Issues

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to on my way to school, react in and experience fear and anxiety and nervousness on my entire way there, because I was afraid how my first day at school will be like.

I see, realize and understand that no matter how my day at school or anywhere else is, I don’t need or require to react emotionally to it, or have an energetic experience or relationship towards it.

I see, realize and understand that having an energetic reaction towards the first day of school is not going to be of any solution, support or assistance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid how my first day in school will be like, because I was worrying about and concerned about whether or not I will enter and be in the right class.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worry and concern about if I will enter/go into the right class or the wrong one, because I fear to enter/go into the wrong class, wrong meaning the class that is not my class that I am supposed to be in this semester.

I see, realize and understand that a lot of these experiences and points I am facing and have been facing today in class/school are still points/experiences/issues from my past I had in relation to school that I hadn’t deal with as of yet.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear entering/going into/being in the wrong class, because it’s so embarrassing and humiliating.

I see, realize and understand that that is just a belief and perception I have of it being embarrassing and humiliating if I were to go into and be in the wrong class on my first day of school, and not actual/real.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive and believe that if I were to go and be in the wrong class on my first day of school, it is embarrassing and humiliating, and that accordingly I have to and will feel/experience embarrassment and humiliation within me.

I see, realize and understand that I am within that actually creating a program/condition, a conditional statement that: IF I am in the wrong class on my ‘First Day of School’, THEN embarrassment and humiliation emotions/energies activate and manifest within my mind, and I experience/feel embarrassed and humiliated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a program/conditional statement within my mind/self of/where: IF I am in the wrong class on my first day of school, THEN I feel embarrassed and humiliated, or I experience embarrassment and humiliation within me.

This fear, anxiety, nervousness and everything I experience in relation to the point of having my first day of school, is something I have to look deeper into and walk and work more one, for I see, realize and understand that the main point this is all in relation to is ‘Having my FIRST day in a school/new class’.

Alright, this is something I will be walking within my next blog(s), and will go up to here for todays writing.

Thank you!



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 12 Jan 2014, 00:19

Day 540 Afraid to start again

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to experience resistance and a form of depression toward/in relation to starting to post my Journey to Life blogs again, because I haven’t done it in a while and think and fear that I won’t be able to keep up with my commitment if I re-commit to post my Journey to Life blogs again.

I see, realize and understand that there is a doubt that I am accepting and allowing to exist within me in relation to who I am in my standing toward my commitments. Also, I see and realize that I am using memories of my past, thus my past, to justify why I should not, or apparently why I cannot, stand up and create a new commitment within myself to start re-publishing my Journey to Life blogs. So, I see and realize that I am using my memories of my past of all the times that I did not post my Journey to Life thus far, as a self-sabotage and self-limitation to keep myself stuck within the fall of my commitment, instead of standing up, forgiving the past and starting to publish my Journey to Life blogs again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself in relation to being able to stand within the point of publishing my Journey to Life writings again, because I wasn’t able to do so within the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my memories of my past of the time and time-frame within which I did not post my Journey to Life blogs, as a self-sabotage and self-limitation to justify why I don’t simply stand up, forgive myself for my past/for my ineffectiveness within my past and live the living-change and correction from Here onwards – and thus use my memories/my past to keep me stuck within my fall and ineffectiveness – because I hold onto the fear of making a mistake again and falling within the same point again.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the fear of making the same mistake again and falling within the same point again, because the more I fall within the same point, especially after I have been stable and consistent within that point for some time, the more depressed and desperate and hopeless I become to ever be able to remain stable and consistent within that point without falling.

The question I need to ask myself here is: Why do I become or react in depression, desperation and hopelessness to me falling within a point?

I mean, I see and realize that it should simply be like: If I fall within a point, even if I have been quite stable and consistent within that point for some time, then it should simply be that I get up, I introspect/research what was the reason for me falling, then I write about it, I forgive it and I live my self-correction again in real-time. And if I fall again, I do the same process again: I introspect/research the reason why I fell and then look for and find solutions, and then I live again in real-time, now being aware of the point that I fell last time in, and if that point present itself again within my walking/process – I apply the self-corrective application for it and move past it, not accepting and allowing myself to fall within the same point again.

I mean, I see and realize that I do not need to become depressed, desperate or hopeless, or create desperation, depression or hopelessness, or any other mind emotional- and feeling energy-experience towards my fall or mistake.

Why? Simply because if I become depresses, desperate or hopeless what will it do to assist and support me with actually understanding why I fell, why the fall happened/manifested and what is the solution that I need to consider and implement in my living so that I can in turn prevent myself from falling again in the first place? Nothing. Becoming emotional, becoming depressed, desperate or hopeless does not give that kind of assistance and support. The opposite happens: By allowing and accepting myself to become and participate within such emotional energy-experiences of hopelessness, depression and desperation towards a fall/falling within a point or points within my process or reality, I am ending up within a state of mind through which I keep myself down and inactive, to the point of creating a point of wanting to give up, just because I placed myself within a point in my mind of feeling so low within myself emotionally that I only see the problem (the fall) but not the potential/ability of a/the solution: To actually be able to understand why I fell and find a solution to it that I can live practically and so prevent me from falling within the same point again in future.

So, I’ll continue with this point within the next writing.

So, this is the first writing within some time that I am publishing again, and more to come.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 29 Jan 2014, 14:55

Day 541 Not acting according to understanding

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to complain to myself about why I don’t take process as seriously as I should, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that I just got to ACT upon my already existent realization and understanding about the importance and seriousness of process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that complaining to myself or someone about why I still don’t take process serious enough even though I have the realization and understanding about it already established, is not going to help, because I am at the stage where I have to physically act on that realization and understanding.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my realization and understanding that I already have about the importance and seriousness of process is now knowledge and information and that I have to now practically Live and Apply that knowledge and information as understanding and realization or I see and realize that otherwise it will just remain knowledge and information and have no physical effect on me or my life or my process as such.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a character of complaint instead of realizing that complaint is not the solution and is not going to change anything or have any practical ‚forward‘ effect that will benefit or assist and support me to transcend the points that I am still not walking through effectively within my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a character of not acting upon my self-realizations and understandings and within that act or living of these self-realizations and understandings transform these knowledge and information points into visible and tangible results and effects and impacts within myself, my life and my process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a character of understanding something but still not acting on my understanding.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as a character of apathy and carelessness regarding my process and the universal process despite realizations and understanding that I have about process and the importance and seriousness of process.

I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within self-honesty investigate the point where I, despite having self-realizations and understandings of a point, still don’t act on those understandings and realizations, and I commit myself to walk the process to change / correct this point within myself.

When and as I see and find myself going into complaining about why I, despite having the realizations and understandings about process, still don’t walk process according to these realizations and understandings – to stop and breathe. I remind myself of my realizations and understanding that complaining about it is not going to change anything or be of any assistive and supportive effect to myself regarding that point. It’s even the contrary, where within complaining about why I don’t walk my process according to or in alignment to my realizations and understandings about process and how I ‚should‘ walk it – I am placing myself into a position of self-accepted and self-validated powerlessness instead of simply realizing that I need to discipline myself to act upon and live and apply my understandings and realizations physically. Meaning that I have to physically deliberately move myself to actively take my realizations and understandings and transform them into practical physical application and living. I am the One that has to actively physically deliberately ‚go‘ and live my process according to my realizations and understanding. Within that, I take and in-breath and an out-breath and I immediately stop complaining and instead investigate what I have to do to manifest or align myself, my life and process according to my realizations and understandings.

I commit myself to live this self-corrective application and specify/alter/modify it as and when necessary to produce the outcome of the necessary self-change.

Further, I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within self-honesty investigate the complaining character within and as me, and I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within self-honesty find solutions to it to change myself in relation to that character.

I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within self-honesty investigate and find solutions to and change myself in relation to the character that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as of not acting upon my self-realizations and understandings.

Further, I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within self-honesty investigate, find solutions to and change myself within and as the character that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as of apathy and carelessness regarding my process and the universal process.

I’ll be going up to here for now, and continue within my next writing. Thank you very much.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 31 Jan 2014, 22:55

Day 542 „I’ll do it later“, a famous excuse and feeling overwhelmed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the „I’ll do it later“ Character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to further justify using and the existence of the „I’ll do it later“ excuse within myself by using another excuse to validate the initial one of „I’ll do it later“.

I see and realize that I am using excuses to try to validate other excuses, and that I am by doing so deceiving myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself by using excuses to validate other excuses with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the backchat of „I have to finish this (what I am doing in that moment) right now“ when it comes to having to do my process-responsibilities, instead of self-honestly assessing if I have to finish up or continue doing what I am doing in a moment or have been doing for some time and decide from there, but not decide to continue to so something out of resisting and not wanting to do my process-responsibilities.


I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application in self-honesty walk through and change this point within and as me that I exist in where I use the excuse/backchat of „I’ll do it later“ and „I have to finish this right now“ without actually having to but wanting to out of resisting and not wanting to do something else, like process-responsibilities or school work or other system-responsibilities.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel overwhelmed with everything that I have to do, but not see and realize that I feel overwhelmed because I have been postponing my responsibilities all day up to now and now only have a few hours left to finish up everything, plus I have built up quite an amount of resistance energy towards doing my responsibilities now by postponing it all day and not doing it right then when I had the time to do them practically – which then created the illusion of overwhelmingness of the amount of work I have to do – while that overwhelmingness is simply me feeling under pressure right now and being in a rush to get everything done and compressed within the last few hours that I have left of my day.

I see and realize that I have created the overwhelmingness that I experience right now through/by postponing my responsibilities to the end of the day and then feeling pressured and being in a rush to complete and get all these responsibilities done for which I had the entire day time for, but didn’t and postponed – trying to get them all done now within the last few hours I have left of my day.

So, I see and realize that the overwhelmingness that I experience is not due to the amount of work/responsibilities that I have to do, but ‚overwhelmed‘ by TRYING to get everything done within the last few hours that I have left of my day, because I didn’t do them when I had the opportunity and practical time to so so, but postponed them instead – building up resistance-energy and then in the late evening WANTING and TRYING to get it all done then, which creates a point where I feel pressured and am in a rush and a Fear and Anxiety of not being able to get it all done by the end of the day within the last few hour that I have left of my day – which creates the Energy/Emotion of Overwhelmingness.

I’ll go up to here for this writing and continue within the next one. Thank you for reading.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 01 Feb 2014, 17:59

Day 543 Too much of one thing

„I see and realize that I have created the overwhelmingness that I experience right now through/by postponing my responsibilities tothe end of the day and then feeling pressured and being in a rush to complete and get all these responsibilities done for which I had the entire day time for, but didn’t and postponed – trying to get them all done now within the last few hours I have left of my day.“

“So, I see and realize that the overwhelmingness that I experience is not due to the amount of work/responsibilities that I have to do, but ‚overwhelmed‘ by TRYING to get everything done within the last few hours that I have left of my day, because I didn’t do them when I had the opportunity and practical time to so so, but postponed them instead – building up resistance-energy and then in the late evening WANTING and TRYING to get it all done then, which creates a point where I feel pressured and am in a rush and aFear and Anxiety of not being able to get it all done by the end of the day within the last few hour that I have left of my day – which creates the Energy/Emotion of Overwhelmingness.“

Today I am continuing with the last days writing, continuing from the above paragraph.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to postpone my process responsibilities to the end of the day, because of resistance that I experience to do them in the moment that I have free time and the opportunity to do a responsibility opens up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist to do a responsibility when I have the time to do so and the opportunity to do so opens up at a time within my day – because I want to do something else that I have either been doing or wanted to start to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to find a balance between all the responsibilities and overall tasks that I am, have to or want to do within a day – and not obsess with one task over another, but create an equilibrium, a balance between responsibilities and tasks during one day.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to obsess with one task and want to do that one task most of my day, and within that resist to and don’t want to do anything else but that one task that I obsess with – instead of realizing, seeing and understanding that I cannot obsess with just one task or responsibility over another, and that I have to find/create a balance between all the tasks and responsibilities that I have or need to or want to do within one day.

For, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that allowing myself to obsess with one task/point only, is going to have consequences. Consequences like not having enough time to do or finish up other responsibilities or tasks that I have to or need to do and finish within that day, because I have postponed them to the end of the day by not wanting to do them due to wanting to continue to do the one task that I obsess with.

Within that, I see, realize and understand that it is not suggested or ‚wise‘ to obsess with just one or a few tasks / points and neglect all the other tasks / points that are part of my life, world, reality and process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the few tasks or points that I obsess with and want to spend most of my daily time with, are NOT the ONLY point, are not the TOTALITY or ENTIRETY of ALL the points that are PART of my ENTIRE world, reality, life and process, and that the task or point that I obsess with and that I like doing a lot – is but just ONE single point within a MULTITUDE of different points that are also existent as parts within my self, world, reality, life and process, and that within that I cannot obsess with just one or a few points / tasks within a day and neglect the other part/points. I see, realize and understand that I have to find/create/establish a balance within and between ALL the points that are part of my life, world, reality and process and need direction or to get done within / during a day or specific time.

I see, realize and understand that another consequence of obsessing with just one or a few points and within that obsession neglecting all the other points that are still very much part of the points that I need to do or direct within the same day or the same time or time-frame – is also going to create guilt within me, because I self-honestly know that I am obsessed and that I am due to my obsession with just one or few points neglecting all the other points within and of my life, world, reality and process. And with that guilt being present within me due to that understanding/awareness of mine in relation to what I am doing – it’s going to compromise my ability to enjoy doing what I like even, so I’ll end up not being able to enjoy what I like even due to the guilt of me knowing that I am being self-dishonest.

So, I see, realize and understand that it’s not worth it to obsess with one or a few points over another.

I see, realize and understand that it should simply be me assessing self-honesty how much time is required for me to set aside and dedicate to a particular point/task based on it’s priority, which I also assess and determine within self-honesty – and then the next step is I set aside that amount of time and dedicate to work on / with that point for the necessary/required time.

Further, I see, realize and understand that not all points require the same amount of time for me to work with them, and that balance or finding balance between all the points that need direction and that I need to work on/with within a day or time-frame/time-period – doesn’t mean that all points will need or require the same amount of time to be dedicated to do them or work with them. No. Balance or finding/establishing a balance in that context means to schedule my available time within one day in such a way that I do tend to the most priority tasks/points that need direction and work within THAT day or THAT time/time-frame/time-period, and this scheduling is flexible and not set. Meaning it is a Daily and Real-Time New Scheduling of what tasks/points I need/require to tend to within THIS DAY/TIME and determining how much time I need to dedicate to each of those tasks/points and determining what is the most Priority point/task within THIS DAY/TIME, and accordingly move myself within and throughout my day.

I commit myself to practice such a daily real-time scheduling of the points/tasks/responsibilities that I need to tend to within the CURRENT day by assessing what tasks/points are of most priority to tend to within the current day and then determining how much time is required for me to dedicate to walk that point/task/responsibility.

I’ll be going up to here for today and continue within my next writing.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 03 Feb 2014, 00:14

Day 544 „I am not done yet!!! My writing/self-forgiveness is incomplete!!!“ Failed Perfection (?) and Inner Emotional Uproar

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worry about not completing a point I am walking, because I think and believe that I should be able to cover and walk through all dimensions of a point within one writing or a few in a short period of time, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that this process of walking through a point completely is multidimensional and walked in space-time, and thus that it will take Time to walk through all the dimensions of a point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I walk one point and one dimension of one point at a time, moving through all dimensions of a point one at a time, till I have walked through all dimensions that comprise one point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want and try to ‚jump‘ dimensions within my process, where I try to take on and walk through and/or even see all dimensions that comprise a/one point at the same time and IMMEDIATELY, because I am afraid to miss out on a dimension of a point.

I see, realize and understand that it’s practically impossible for me, at this stage in my process at least, to be able to take-on and walk-through and/or even see/recognize/realize all the dimensions that comprise a/one point in my process simultaneously or immediately, and that practically the process works in the way that I walk in space-time and as such I will expand my awareness in the sense of seeing more and more dimensions of a point, within time and equally within time walk through more of the dimensions of a point, but always one dimension at a time and one point at a time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid/exist in fear of/towards missing out on a dimension of a point within my process, because it makes me angry and frustrated to within my awareness know/be aware of the fact that there is more to a point that I don’t see yet, and that as such I didn’t walk through the point completely yet.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry/experience anger towards myself knowing/being aware that there are more dimensions to a point that I am not seeing/not able to see yet that I have or am walking, and that my ‚work‘ or ‚walk-through‘ in relation to that point is half-done/not done yet, because I am upset within and feeling/experiencing myself as discomfortable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel/experience myself as discomfortable and upset within when I walk a point within my process, yet still after writing for a day or for a few days, feel like the point is still not clear and that there are more dimensions to it and thus that my work/walk-through is only half-done/undone as of yet – because I am not satisfied with my work for it’s not perfect in my eyes yet and I want it to be perfect.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get upset and experience discomfort within myself and my body when/if I do not get or cannot get something done perfectly in my eyes within the desired amount of time, because I think and believe I have to be perfect immediately or very soon within every point that I take on and walk within my process, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that perfection is a process where I become/create/realize/build/process/render myself into perfection/completion with regards to the points I am walking within my process/life/existence and thus takes time since I am processing myself within this process into perfection/completion through TIME for I am existing and walking in Space-Time PhysicalReality and my process is taking place in Space-Time Physical Reality.

Alright, I’ll be going up to here for todays writing and continue within my next writing.

Thank you very much for reading.



Dilan
Posts: 650
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 18:48

Re: Aldin's Journey to Life

Postby Dilan » 04 Feb 2014, 23:40

Day 545 Your Fears are a Program and this is how you Change the Program

Read this for reference: Girl, 11, overcomes her crippling fear of dogs thanks to HYPNOTISM – and now she’s got a puppy of her own called Vinnie

However hypnotism here is replaced with a more direct technique/tool to re-program our minds/selves. A trinity of tools with *direct* impact on the Self and one’s Mind called Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am a product of programing from all kinds of sources, such as environment, parents, friends, media, society, self, beliefs, thoughts and so on, and as such I am able to be re-programmed and be the One to re-program myself in any way I like. I just have to decide and live my decisionagainst all odds/resistances/obstacles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my fears are programmed into me, and as such can be re-programmed and as such I can be the One that re-program my fears and program myself to be and live and exist without fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my fears and my beliefs I have about myself are a state of program, programmed into me, either by direct self-acceptance and allowance, thus actively, or passively through the environment and so on, yet still self-accepted in the sense of that I am still the One that accept and allow myself to *be influenced* by my environment and others where I then create or accept programs such as fears, Anxieties, Phobias, Beliefs, Self-Judgements and so on about myself and the world to become Part of My Self and My Mind – and that as such that state of program is able to be re-programmed and that I can be the One to re-program my own Programs that I allowed and accepted to be part of me, my mind and my body and from there spread into my life, living and word/reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my ordeals I go through by having fears, anxieties, phobias, destructive self-beliefs and self-images are a state of accepted and allowed programs and as such able to be RE-PROGRAMMED and that I can be/am the One with the ability to RE-PROGRAM these and PROGRAM myself into *anything* I want or would like to be. However I see, realize and understand that it is suggested and best to program/re-program oneself into someone that is existing within principles and a way of life that is for the Best of All Beings/Lives on this Earth and Existence as a whole, because after all commonsense tells that a way of life governed by principles that’s Best for All Life is also Best for Self and thus Oneself will Benefit to the Highest in such a way and allow others to Benefit the Best as well.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application within the starting point ofSelf-Honesty is the trinity for successful self-change/self-transformation and the way to be able to, with success, re-program all my Fears, Phobias, Anxieties, Destructive Self-Images and Beliefs about myself and this world and anyone or anything else, as well as re-program all destructive ways of living that cause negative consequence of harm and abuse and compromise on other Life Forms and hurts/compromises the Basic Right/Law of Life that is Equal for Everyone, small and big, which is the Law/Right to be treated and to treat each other as Life in honor,respect, care, harmony and equality and to give to each one Life Form, from small to big, the opportunity and freedom to have the tools, resources and means necessary and required to be able to create and live and guarantee a Life to their fullest potential equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the tools of Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application done/applied withinSelf-Honesty gives Self the opportunity and ability to become one’s own Savior of one’s own Inner Demons and Monsters of Fear, Phobias, Anxieties, Judgement towards self and others, Destructive Self-Beliefs and Images about Self and Others which act as Ghosts that haunt us daily and compromise ourselves to be able to live a life that is much ‚greater‘ in it’s potential than what we believe is possible when looking at our Minds and at our current state and experience of ourselves with all these Inner Demons and Monsters that we believe is more than us and that we believe is all there is and cannot be changed, but it can.

I am the One that can do it as you are the one that can do it for yourself as we are all the Ones that can do it for ourselves: Set ourselves free from our Inner Ordeals by re-programing who and what we have accepted and allowed ourselves to be programmed as and program ourselves anew, but this time in Self-Awareness and by that how we would like to experience ourselves for real to our fullest potential and also give each other the opportunity to do so for themselves as well.

We harbor the Keys with which we can type a new Line of Code, one after the Other, until we complete a new Program, Line of Code by Line of Code until we complete a Program of our ‚Choice‘ as what we would like to truly be and exist and experience ourselves within this world: Free from All Fear, Anxiety, Self-Judgement, Judgement towards Others, Destructive Self-Images and Beliefs about Ourselves and about Others and our World as a whole, and instead create a Harmonious Inner and Outer Environment that allows for the ability to create and expand one’s life and experience of ourselves in this world and that of the whole world with all it’s Life Forms to the fullest potential that LIFE can be, become and exist as.

So, let us take this gift that we each harbor within ourselves and live it. Let’s learn, understand, practice and perfect our ability and skills to use the ‚Self-Programming-Languages‘ of Self-Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective Application and use them within our Inner-Development-Environment (our inner IDE) as Our-Selves that allow us to de-program our current state of mind/program and self and re-program ourselves into something that is Equal to Life to it’s fullest potential.

Thank you very much!




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