Cerise Journey To Life

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CerisePoolman
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Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 25 May 2017, 20:18

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... -year.html

I survived another year in this world where life is supposed to be simple. Unfortunately it seldom is.



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CerisePoolman
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Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 19:24

Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 27 May 2017, 17:57

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... esson.html

Is there a way to teach someone a lesson in a not-fucked-up way after they've been a dick to you? Time to #getreal with this here question from a viewer.



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CerisePoolman
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Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 30 May 2017, 19:37

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... -keep.html

I originally wrote this bloge here: https://eqonehorsemanship.wordpress.com ... hats-good/

When I first started learning about horsemanship I got myself quite set in thinking that there was only one way to work with horses, and that was the right way. My way. The only way. All other methods / approaches were WRONG. I felt superior in my knowing that my way was the only and best way ever in the world. Ever.

Thankfully I started seeing things differently at some point. It started with me allowing myself to consider the possibility that maybe there were other ways to go about this, and that maybe some of those ways might be more effective, or even more pleasant. I don’t recall that there was a specific trigger or event that precipitated my change of perception, but what I do recall is that the change started with my willingness to consider things outside of my rigid box of opinions.

I find it interesting looking back now, it’s like I had locked myself into this one way of seeing horsemanship, and I believed so strongly that it was the best way – but I hadn’t even looked into different ways, so my belief was totally unsupported. That’s the funny thing about some of the things we believe, it’s like we become lost in the righteousness of our belief that we will not even look at anything else. In some areas of life this kind of behaviour may not have a big effect on anyone’s life, but when it comes to horsemanship, beliefs like these can and do affect the lives of our horses.

Let me take an extreme example of what some trainers believe you must do to the Tennessee Walking Horse – “soring” or putting huge blocks on their hooves to force them to pick their legs up higher and “step up” nicely. To most of us, that is a completely unacceptable practice – but to the people who are doing it, they will (likely) believe that it is the best method to achieve their desired outcome. This of course can be seen in all areas of life – and it’s up to us to recognise that our action can and do effect the lives and happiness of others.

I may not have done things like in the example above, but I did try to force my ways onto my horse, even when he clearly was not understanding or enjoying what we were doing. I told myself that he would learn in time, I just had to keep trying. Am I ashamed of some of the things I did? Yes. Will I hold my mistakes against myself? No. I am learning from my mistakes and making sure that I am listening to my horse. Thankfully our horses are very forgiving, probably more than we deserve. We always have the opportunity to change, and our horses will change with us if we help them.

I have a principle I live by now, not only with my horsemanship but in all areas of my life: Investigate all things and keep what’s good. Even in those methods or practices that I generally don’t agree with I may find just one kernel of something good that I can test in my own life. And yes, I won’t simply see something that looks cool and then make it my motto in life – I will take the time to test it and see for myself how well it works, where it works, for which horse it works. Which brings me to an important point: not every exercise will work for every horse, and it’s up to us to hear when our horses tell us that something isn’t working, and our responsibility to change it.



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CerisePoolman
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Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 03 Jun 2017, 13:13

Have you ever thought to yourself that people, in many ways, resemble computers? Even if you haven't, it's time to #getreal with our programmable natures.

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... le-me.html



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CerisePoolman
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Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 04 Jun 2017, 19:57

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... thing.html

I originally wrote this post here: https://eqonehorsemanship.wordpress.com ... verything/

We’ll never know everything there is to know about any one thing in life – it’s simply not going to happen. When I realised this, I decided that I will never stop learning.

We have this tendency to think we know everything about something, especially when we think we’re pretty good at it. We get a kind of tunnel vision, thinking that all there is in the whole of the world, life and existence is what we know, and that there cannot possibly be anything else outside of that.

I found that when I spent a lot of time with people who didn’t know much about horses, I’d feel pretty knowledgeable. I’d feel smart, informed and downright cool. But then, if I ever did spend time around “horsey people” who shared knowledge that contradicted what I believed, I’d tell myself that they were wrong, and I was right. It didn’t matter how much sense they were making.

Thankfully I realised that I couldn’t possibly always be right, and that there had to be more than what I thought I knew. So, I started listening to other people more, I started playing around with different methods, I started actually looking for new and different information. Within all of this I realised an interesting thing: I will never stop learning, and I don’t want to.

I started truly enjoying looking outside my restrictive box of beliefs, knowledge and tools. I found that there were certain tools, methods, philosophies and starting points that worked differently for individual horses. I found also that a lot of the time, it wasn’t so much about the specific method or exercise I was using – the best results always came when my starting point within myself was one of calm and wanting to help the horse. If I was frustrated then it wouldn’t matter what exercise I was doing – my frustration would be what dominated the session.

One of the most important aspects in what I learned, was that learning isn’t always about studying, or reading up about different techniques – I realised more and more how much I learn about myself and about my horse in every moment that we are together, no matter what we are doing. When I closed myself off to being aware of myself or my horse, our time spent together would often be awkward, uncomfortable and sometimes even contentious. I found that whenever I was being stubborn about something within me or the horse (like how the horse should respond, apparently), I’d lock down in our session and that would create an unpleasant experience for both of us. So now I make it a point to be flexible, not have any expectations and to check in with my horse to see what he needs in that particular moment. Just as important is that I stay aware of how I am responding within myself to the horse, so that I can change any response patterns that I don’t actually want (like getting frustrated when the horse does not understand what I am asking).

It can be difficult to learn new things, especially things that challenge our “preset” self definitions. We owe it to ourselves and to our horses to neverstop learning, and to never think that we already know everything, because that’s when we start forcing things – which is seldom an enjoyable experience.



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CerisePoolman
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Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 05 Jun 2017, 19:33

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... crite.html

I am such a hypocrite, and it's time to #getreal with myself. How can I judge others for behaviour that I actually also live?

Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/getreal



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CerisePoolman
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Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 19:24

Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 14 Jun 2017, 15:03

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... -baby.html

Babies, babies, babies... Since one has magically appeared in my life, I am faced with a recurring question: Do I ever want to have a baby? Time to #getreal with myself about how I have been looking at this decision.

Support me on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/getreal



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CerisePoolman
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Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 19:24

Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 16 Jun 2017, 22:10

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... imple.html

Life is simple. OK well maybe it's not, but it's supposed to be. Time to #getreal with the nature of life and humanity.



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CerisePoolman
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Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 19:24

Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 20 Jun 2017, 21:16

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... ns-me.html

The last few weeks have been hectic, to say the least. But when I don't create a balance within myself and my life, I feel like I have been run into the ground. Time to #getreal with my tendency to try to do more, be better and be a superhero - but ending up just flattening myself.

For more support on this topic check out this awesome recording from #Eqafe: https://eqafe.com/p/work-work-work-redi ... your-spark

Support me on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/getreal



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CerisePoolman
Posts: 1242
Joined: 15 Sep 2011, 19:24

Re: Cerise Journey To Life

Postby CerisePoolman » 22 Jun 2017, 21:13

http://activistsjourneytolife.blogspot. ... e-who.html


I think it's safe to say that we all know what it feels like to try and help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. It can be difficult to decide what to do, and especially difficult to watch the other person going down a self-destructive path. It's time to #getreal with what we can do when trying to help someone who just won't help themselves.




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