A statement instead of a question

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Luc St-Amand
Posts: 183
Joined: 13 Nov 2012, 16:54

A statement instead of a question

Postby Luc St-Amand » 20 Aug 2016, 16:18

I have been facing myself within my reactions of lust amd I find it can be overwhelming at times. I know myself and I know that I still react to lustful wishes. I resist who I am as a program towards sex because it doesn't feel right. I justify it as being a man and that man has evolved to actively seek out sex to procreate or whatever. This is true to some extent because we wouldn't be here without the act of sex. But I certianly do not look at a girls ass in hopes of procreating... so I feel powerlessness when it comes to lust. I say things like, "girls shouldn't show soo much skin, or tights, or short shorts. Of course I understand that it has nothing to do with the girls wardrobe, instead how I react to it, and that is where the powerlessness thought is activated. I will look at girls ass's wearing short shorts and bang! I stop and talk to myself about it, I comfort myself in knowing that the reaction isn't real, that I have the directive strength to stop myself... and then... bang! An hour later I am doing the same thing. It bothers me soooo much this dissonance I experiance with lust. What are some of the key points here? Well, I do not stand for sex as its current expression because sex is meant for one thing. Of course it feels good but it would feel equally good to bond with somone by putting our two index fingers together stand face to face and speak words of embrace, share words with one another that last till death do us part. That to me is real that to me is sex! What we do nowadays is horrendous! I feel so terrible for girls and what man has done to them, I feel terrible for what I have done to girls within my desire for lust. This is a statement not a question. The suffering of my fathers before me has ended upon death, not for me! I will end what I started as the sharpest spike of my creation within breath, wether it be in the next breath or a thousand! I will end what I started as lust and I want you to know that.



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Gian
Posts: 1037
Joined: 14 Jun 2011, 22:18

Re: A statement instead of a question

Postby Gian » 21 Aug 2016, 18:10

Hey Luc

The point of Lust and how it plays out in our day to day life is quit overwhelming sometimes.

I have dealth with the Lust point for a very long time within my process now. regardless of being in an agreement/relationship - lust comes up, towards one partner or outside of the partnership.

a point that I worked with and that has helped me to work through this lust (strong sexual desire towards someone) was to look at the word expression, where I would compromise myself in daily moments of expressing myself, not sex related at all, where I would spend most of my time thinking, looking, being an observer within my reality, and after a day or two and months and years later, I started having this Lust coming up, because I have now placed expression in sex, and so I now believe that through sex I can express myself, have a release for expressing myself, and so when I see for example women/girls that dress to express (to show) I would have the lust point come up, because the women is expressing herself, so she is showing me what I am suppressing and so she becomes the answer to my expression, which is misleading, because the initial point had NOTHING to do with sex.

So throughout my days working on stopping the Lust desires for sex, I had to focus on the opposite things of sex in a way, like where I used to watch people bake cake, I would now join in, or where I see people doing gardening, I would now join in, so I had to expand my expression within my world as a participant and stop existing as a observer that suppresses and distancing myself from living and expressing in my reality. besides joining in on what others are doing, obviously it is also about what I did with myself and my own time as expressing myself.

I used the women/girls that I saw brought up lust within me, because it is inherently ME and has nothing to do with the women/girls, I would cross reference to see what is brought up so that I can deal with it, the initial points I have placed within the women and separated myself from within me.

for example, I saw this one girl once, she was walking past me in the mall, just the way she walked as though she was confident and even when she looked at me, she looked into my eyes and smiled, this brought up a lust within me - I took the moment and point immediately back to myself and saw that I was seeing myself as the opposite within me and that for me to walk like her was wrong, to have that confidence, and so I breathed and immediately integrated the point, lifted up my shoulders and walked in breath here, instead of giving into the lust of the women having that solution for me - this is a simple example, but that's how I did it, and over time, I have No more lust coming up, attraction, yes sometimes, but I stop and delete that by now immediately, practice with lots of self-forgiveness sorts it out.

perhaps you can have a journal here where you write out each moment that triggers the lust and we can do self forgiveness here and release the points. as self support and for others.



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Luc St-Amand
Posts: 183
Joined: 13 Nov 2012, 16:54

Re: A statement instead of a question

Postby Luc St-Amand » 22 Aug 2016, 00:31

Absolutely Gian, and thank you for your support.


Today while walking to the buss stop, I noticed two girls about 100 yards in front of me walking to the same bus stop, and they are wearing bright florescent/neon colored cloths, what ever little they were wearing. It was eaasy to tell that they had all the right parts, and immediately the lusting of getting a closer look came up. The funny thing is, when I got to the bus stop I didn't look at them lol. It's like I carry a lot of shame towards my lust for sex.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to identify girls with lust / sex. the only one creating that mind construct is me and I allow and accept that truth.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to reflect the act of sex as a vial to hide the REAL reflection from coming through. The real reflection is me and how i can transform the mind consciousness system into physical expression and I accept and allow that.

so, what was the real reflection? hmm.. well I certainly experience a larger amount of energy when I am near them, than when I am at a distance, also I am by myself at this time and that changes my reactions as appose to being with friends/family, hmmm, so why do I look away, what am I afraid of? well to be honest i do make eye contact and attempt to hold eye contact with girls that are dressed more modestly 'hmmm, I feel ashamed to look at a girl that's wearing a bikini in the mall, but if she's at the beach - different story - lol i'm just jumbling through here, back on track.

ok so the main point today is "the parts that stood out" that is when I initially reacted. So I attach good sex, to good health, I mean if she looks fat or old then i don't give it a thought. And these florescent ladys did have your typical "music video" body so that is the "hiding" place of my creation within this construct. it lies in "Good health" so today my reaction was of good health, which is something i know I reflect within myself all the time, heck I even do it with guys that are in good health, Not sexually but admiration perhaps.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to identify "good health" according to what M.T.V has shown me growing up and accepting and allowing a perfect figure as "good health" I know that all bodies are different in their expression and good health can come from an abundance of shapes and sizes.

I graps what your saying Gian, it's a gift to just stop, let go, and breathe in a new expression. I always blow on these beautiful plants in the mall as i walk by knowing they love the carbon from my breath, it has supported me during a lot of these "lustfull" observations. Thank you for reaching out Gian I am honored to be doing this with you, with every reply i will push myself further with you so we can as you said support each other and those reading.



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Andrew
Posts: 805
Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 20:32

Re: A statement instead of a question

Postby Andrew » 23 Aug 2016, 06:55

Hey Luc

I can relate to a lot of what you are writing about here, as I am facing it in my own life as well.
One thing that I have been practicing this past month is to simply Not Look.

Of course, I do see its cool to reflect of course and introspect about the lust, and what different individuals bring up within oneself, but for myself one thing that I am finding is supportive is to practice that application of "not looking" where literally as soon as I notice that experience within me where its like my eyes are just being drawn to the person, I recognize that this is exactly when I must Stop, breathe, and Direct Myself, meaning. I decide where I look, when I look, and I do not allow myself to be pulled, this way and that which is what I would often experience when for instance walking through a crowd where there is a lot of attractive people. So I have been practicing this.

Within this I have also been asking myself "What is so important over there" that I would give up my Directive/Creative Principle of myself where "I am powerless and must stare"

For me this has supported me in developing my own Self Directiveness and Stability within myself. I know I still have a process to walk with this until I am Stable within myself and can just be here and content and not feel the desire, or urge to stare at some women to experience some kind of fulfillment.

Also I find if I do give in, in a moment and glance over, I practice not being hard on myself, and rather just gently bring my attention back to myself and regroup and refocus again on the task of supporting myself to stop being a slave to this magnetic energy feeling that I have given my power away to.




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