Banker's Journey to Life

Maya
Posts: 1267
Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 21:56

Re: Banker's Journey to Life

Postby Maya » 01 Nov 2012, 21:41

I have joined the Desteni I Process Lite course and have completed my first lesson... so will be walking the course and posting here. Thanks!
Cool!!!



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Bella
Posts: 1708
Joined: 14 Jun 2011, 13:07

Re: Banker's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 01 Nov 2012, 23:54

really cool thread here, welcome to the forum Tammy!

it's great that you're walking this -
enjoy your process!



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Tammy
Posts: 11
Joined: 16 Oct 2012, 16:47

Re: Banker's Journey to Life

Postby Tammy » 02 Nov 2012, 03:50

Here is a SF discovery though the DIP course - I went into the first assignment not knowing what to expect... I thought I would just be writing about a recurring thought I had been having over the last few days... I would think about the experience with the man I had helped at the bank not really know why it kept coming up in my mind, but as I typed out the story other points emerged as how that experience was a reflection on me and how I have been holding back on living because of a belief I have about money.


Many years ago I was working at the bank. My job was to answer the phone and to handle whatever banking related need came through. This call was a man calling in to apply for a credit increase on his credit card... a pretty 'normal' request that I had in my role. I talked to him and filled in the necessary information on the screens. He had a small limit, about $1000- and was only looking to get another $1000- on it. I processed the application and the 'system' approved him for his credit line increase. I let him know. All through the call he seemed pretty calm, but when I told him he was approved I could hear him break down and cry on the other end of the phone. I asked him if everything was okay... he proceeded to tell me that he just got a call from his family that his mother was on her death bed and that he needed the credit line increase to get a ticket to fly out to see her and he was not sure if he would have the money to get there, but now that his limit was raised he would be able to go and see her.

That incident has remained with me off and on throughout the years, but has been resurfacing lately. I want to say that it is surfacing as one of those moments in my life that is helping me walk the process and to help bring about an equal money system. But now as I write this other points are coming up:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I did a good job by helping that man get a credit line increase without seeing/realizing/understanding that my joy of believing I did a good thing that day only helped compound the feeling of helping others through working with the money system that is currently in place.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to share this experience with my co-workers and to share a belief that the bank was helping individuals gain credit so that they could do things in life such as visit a dying relative.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel sorrow towards the man for having to hide his life experience until a decision was made by the credit system out of fear of being denied credit, thus being denied the moment to visit his dying mother, which reflects me in life, a belief that I must hold off on doing what is right for me to live because of fear that I can't get money or credit to do what must be done.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not being able to live my life here out of fear that I will not have enough 'credit' to live.

I see and realize that I have to face this experience not as a story that I can let run in my mind as a reminder of not only what needs to be done, but that I needed to learn from the experience as to how it reflects on my life/ideas/perception of what money/credit means to how I am living my life.

I see and realize that I have connected this man's experience as being just a story that I thought was only to help compel me to walk through the process of equal money for all; whereas it was a mirror for me to let me know that I also need to face my own fears I have about living and doing what is right for life and remove the fear of not having enough credit/money to do it.

Thus within this I commit myself, when I am faced with knowing what it is that I want to do with my life, knowing it is best for all life and when I am faced with a thought/feeling/emotion that I don't have enough credit/money to do it, I stop, breathe, face and forgive my thoughts/feelings/emotions and bring myself back here, as breath, and walk through what I know to be best for all.



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Tammy
Posts: 11
Joined: 16 Oct 2012, 16:47

Re: Banker's Journey to Life

Postby Tammy » 04 Nov 2012, 07:19

I am participating in the Desteni I Process Lite course and when time allows I will post SF points here as well.

Tonight I am writing regarding the thoughts/feelings/emotions that came up when I watched the video link Maya sent through - Barbara Ehrenreich's - Smile or Die.

As mentioned in my introduction I worked at a large bank here in Canada as a senior manager. I had a team of 7 managers and they each had about 15 staff members, so my 'team' was approximately 115 people. As managers we were trained to coach the staff to serve our customers and my job was to ensure that every one was putting their best foot forward and making their interactions with customers a pleasant one. Over the years I noticed that many of people joining the bank were no longer 'highly educated'... the bank had expanded their call center in our area so fast that it had a hard time finding qualified candidates to fill the role and so it resorted to job banks/temp agencies to bring people in on a contract basis... that way if they didn't fit into the role they could easily be 'let go'. This lead to high turnover and a lot of people 'living on the edge' as they could see this high turnover happening in our center. As well, when permanent positions came up there was 'fierce' competition amongst the temp workers for these positions. In Canada it is difficult to terminate an employee who meets their targets, basically does their job, but has a bad attitude or questions policy... as managers we were given examples of other departments who had employees 'turn on' the company and had started unions, which we were informed was not something we would want happen in our department because as managers our ability to coach employees would disappear and we would be stuck with employees who could just 'ride' the system.

As Barbara noted in her video speech a lot of corporations were no longer looking for skilled employees, but rather employees with a positive attitude. I can say first hand that this was the case at the company I worked for. As managers we were trained on what to look for in employees -- not so much the skills, but rather we were trained on finding employees with the 'right' 'can-do' attitude. And part of our coaching training was focused on 'helping' employees change their attitude. When there were changes being implemented (ie/ department cuts, job changes, new 'programs') the management team was the first to know and we were always sent to a meeting to hear the information about the changes, and then we underwent 'training' to help deal with the possible 'fall out' of the change from our employees. We had special trainers that would be in the room with us to help us role-play what our employees might think/do/act/say and they were there to help us prepare for the change. They would tell us to ally with the team members that we could 'count on' to stay positive and use them as examples or to let them take a lead in the change since they were on the front line of the change. If there was an employee who didn't take the news well or were a disruption we would have to schedule one-on-one coaching with them in order to help them adjust to the change, and if that didn't work we were to schedule a meeting with them, their manager, myself, and my manager or human resource counselor. All the managers office were clearly visible to the rest of the department, so when this happened other employees could see what was going on, and I am sure this created fear amongst anyone who might of had thoughts of the changes being wrong, but usually only a few people in a department of 400 ever spoke up - because they could see what happened to people who did try to speak up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a positive attitude makes a better employee.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to assist in the programming of one's attitude in order to achieve results for a corporation and disregard the human being.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be programmed by a corporation in the belief that an attitude is the most important thing a person has to offer in this world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to pass this programming unto my managers, and unto their employees, creating a cycle of belief that a positive attitude is what is needed for a company to function at it's best.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that a positive attitude does not make a better human being, but rather it makes a being of compliance to the system, especially if it is out of fear of losing one's income rather than speaking up when something is wrong with how things are being changed.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that a positive attitude during time of changes can be manipulated by the management team in order to achieve it's own goals and not do what is best for all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have participated in a system/corporation that employs the use of programming of positive attitudes to achieve it's own goals while it disregards the needs of other beings.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a positive attitude and not skills or common sense is the most important attribute a being can possess.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use other beings that did not display a positive attitude as an example to others by parading them into a senior level managers office for extra 'coaching', or to terminate their temporary contract if their attitude did not fit into the positive attitude box the bank/I was looking for.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in a system where human beings are forced into a system of competition where the ones with the best positive attitude 'wins' a permanent position where the others are simply let go even though they may of had the skills, experience, knowledge to do a good job, but because of their attitude and their questioning of bank's policy made it necessary to let them go so they didn't make waves by expressing their disagreement of what they say was happening.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to coach fellow human beings to become more positive because having more positive employees meant less work for me, for when an employee was positive about the changes they were less likely to question what was going on and less likely to talk to other beings about what was really happening, thus the bank was able to implement job changes/job cuts/new programs without having to face any fall out by beings who saw what was really happening.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be an employee who possessed a positive attitude and would shun fellow employees who came to me with perceived negative viewpoints about a change because I feared being associated with them out of fear that I would viewed as someone who would need extra coaching.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to arm myself with a positive attitude when I went to work, thus being unable to see what was really going, unable to hear the beings who could hear what was really happening and instead used the excuse that they weren't being positive and all I needed to do was to change their attitude to make the situation go away.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to defend the stance that the best thing a person could do was to change their attitude because I felt/thought/wished/desired that a positive attitude would help create a better environment for everyone.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear allowing an employee to continue working on my team if I sensed or felt their attitude was changing out of fear they would dissent and create a problem within the department, and possibly organizing other employees in order to form a union.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in a positive attitude without realizing the quantum consequences a positive attitude has to do with what is really here in this world.
I am participating in the Desteni I Process Lite course and when time allows I will post SF points here as well.

Tonight I am writing regarding the thoughts/feelings/emotions that came up when I watched the video link Maya sent through - Barbara Ehrenreich's - Smile or Die.

As mentioned in my introduction I worked at a large bank here in Canada as a senior manager. I had a team of 7 managers and they each had about 15 staff members, so my 'team' was approximately 115 people. As managers we were trained to coach the staff to serve our customers and my job was to ensure that every one was putting their best foot forward and making their interactions with customers a pleasant one. Over the years I noticed that many of people joining the bank were no longer 'highly educated'... the bank had expanded their call center in our area so fast that it had a hard time finding qualified candidates to fill the role and so it resorted to job banks/temp agencies to bring poeple in on a contract basis... that way if they didn't fit into the role they could easily be 'let go'. This lead to high turnover and a lot of people 'living on the edge' as they could see this high turnover happening in our center. As well, when permanent positions came up there was 'fierce' competition amongst the temp workers for these positions. In Canada it is difficult to terminate an employee who meets their targets, basically does their job, but has a bad attitude or questions policy... as managers we were given examples of other departments who had employees 'turn on' the company and had started unions, which we were informed was not something we would want happen in our department because as managers our ability to coach employees would disappear and we would be stuck with employees who could just 'ride' the system.

As Barbara noted in her video speech a lot of corporations were no longer looking for skilled employees, but rather employees with a positive attitude. I can say first hand that this was the case at the company I worked for. As managers we were trained on what to look for in employees -- not so much the skills, but rather we were trained on finding employees with the 'right' 'can-do' attitude. And part of our coaching training was focused on 'helping' employees change their attitude. When there were changes being implemented (ie/ department cuts, job changes, new 'programs') the management team was the first to know and we were always sent to a meeting to hear the information about the changes, and then we underwent 'training' to help deal with the possible 'fall out' of the change from our employees. We had special trainers that would be in the room with us to help us role-play what our employees might think/do/act/say and they were there to help us prepare for the change. They would tell us to ally with the team members that we could 'count on' to stay positive and use them as examples or to let them take a lead in the change since they were on the front line of the change. If there was an employee who didn't take the news well or were a disruption we would have to schedule one-on-one coaching with them in order to help them adjust to the change, and if that didn't work we were to schedule a meeting with them, their manager, myself, and my manager or human resource councellor. All the managers office were clearly visible to the rest of the department, so when this happened other employees could see what was going on, and I am sure this created fear amongst anyone who might of had thoughts of the changes being wrong, but usually only a few people in a department of 400 ever spoke up - because they could see what happened to people who did try to speak up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a positive attitude makes a better employee.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to assist in the programming of one's attitude in order to achieve results for a corporation and disregard the human being.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be programmed by a corporation in the belief that an attitude is the most important thing a person has to offer in this world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to pass this programming unto my managers, and unto their employees, creating a cycle of belief that a positive attitude is what is needed for a company to function at it's best.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that a positive attitude does not make a better human being, but rather it makes a being of compliance to the system, especially if it is out of fear of losing one's income rather than speaking up when something is wrong with how things are being changed.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that a positive attitude during time of changes can be manipulated by the management team in order to achieve it's own goals and not do what is best for all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have participated in a system/corporation that employs the use of programming of positive attitudes to achieve it's own goals while it disregards the needs of other beings.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a positive attitude and not skills or common sense is the most important attribute a being can possess.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use other beings that did not display a positive attitude as an example to others by parading them into a senior level managers office for extra 'coaching', or to terminate their temporary contract if their attitude did not fit into the positive attitude box the bank/I was looking for.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in a system where human beings are forced into a system of competition where the ones with the best positive attitude 'wins' a permanent position where the others are simply let go even though they may of had the skills, experience, knowledge to do a good job, but because of their attitude and their questioning of bank's policy made it necessary to let them go so they didn't make waves by expressing their disagreement of what they say was happening.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to coach fellow human beings to become more positive because having more positive employees meant less work for me, for when an employee was positive about the changes they were less likely to question what was going on and less likely to talk to other beings about what was really happening, thus the bank was able to implement job changes/job cuts/new programs without having to face any fall out by beings who saw what was really happening.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be an employee who possessed a positive attitude.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to arm myself with a positive attitude when I went to work, thus being unable to see what was really going, unable to hear the beings who could hear what was really happening and instead used the excuse that they weren't being positive and all I needed to do was to change their attitude to make the situtation go away.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to defend the stance that the best thing a person could do was to change their attitude because I felt/thought/wished/desired that a positive attitude would help create a better environment for everyone.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear allowing an employee to continue working on my team if I sensed or felt their attitude was changing out of fear they would dissent and create a problem within the department, and possibly organizing other employees in order to form a union.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe in a positive attitude without realizing the quantum consequences a positive attitude has to do with what is really here in this world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself not to hear the viewpoints of other beings who expressed a negative attitude out of fear that if I heard them and sided with them that I would be associated with them and would not be rewarded further job opportunities if a change/new program was stalled or cancelled because I was not able to bring everyone on board with the change.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself not to see how the positive attitude mentality has corrupted the workplace to an extent that companies treat people with indifference by using temporary agencies so they can effectively weed out people who do not support the changes they are making to the workplaces in this world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself not to see how the positive attitude mentality has corrupted the human being to an extent that human beings who are so focused on being positive that they disregard the honest truth of what is really going on in this world as they can no longer see the hardships that other beings are being forced to live because they don't want to see or face anything that this is not positive.


I see and realize that I have judged human beings as being worthy based on their attitude because of belief that the best thing a person can have is a positive attitude because it makes working with them easier when everyone gets along and can help themselves through difficult changes, because I didn't want to face the truth of situation as I was a manager who was to be in control of implementing the bank policy and needed to do so because of my job, and therefore I commit myself to stop judging beings based on their attitude as being the most important thing one can possess as I see and realize that an attitude can be manipulated in order to survive in this world and I see and realize that a positive attitude will not change this world.

I see and realize that I have connected a positive attitude to self and that of making it easier to secure a job when one has a positive attitude towards changes that are not best for all and thus allowing the changes to happen without seeing and realizing that beings with positive attitudes won't take a stand to the changes, thus I commit myself to no longer putting on a positive attitude in order to face these changes but rather to take a breath, stand as one and equal and to stand up and participate for what is best for all.

Thus within this I commit myself to, when and as I am faced with seeing/hearing/realizing someone else's attitude, or my own attitude towards a situation in which I feel, see, or hear myself believing that their/my attitude is positive out of fear of expressing the truth/out of preprogamming/out of habit... I stop, and breathe and bring myself back here, as breath, and walk self forgiveness and stand for what is best for all.



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Rozelle de Lange
Posts: 650
Joined: 14 Jun 2011, 14:04

Re: Banker's Journey to Life

Postby Rozelle de Lange » 04 Nov 2012, 09:04

Cool Tammy!

Yes, 'Barbara Ehrenreich's - Smile or Die' indeed shows how positivity/positive thinking is merely an illusion one imposes onto reality to avoid facing the reality of what is HERE. In her case the reality being cancer and the fact that it has been proven that positive thinking is not a cure in any way whatsoever.

Cool writings about your job and the whole 'positive attitude' point which is expected from employees within that environment.

Note: You double-posted some of your writings in your post above (for future reference to check)

Thanks for sharing.




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