how did I get here - I guess It was that nagging voice at the back of my head saying that this forum is a place (seems the only place) where I can find common sense and support, so again I am happy to be back. I am going to start by writing out each year of my life for myself - briefly in one paragraph
Year 1-2 = only one memory of crying and no-body there - my parents used to go out alot and granny looked after me.
Year 3-4 = Lots of great memories, asking my mum why her tummy was big - pregnant, learnt to swim, nursery school was great, saw a few ugly things.. jungle gym falls etc.. and my friend Peter died - I remember sitting on the rock we used to sit on and know he's not coming back, so I understood death.
Year 5-6 - Pissed my pants first day at big school ... girls helped me to my ma's car... then it went smooth ... top of class - my ma had taught me maths and reading already
Years 7-11 - Junior school - ups and downs, wins and loss ... normal normal .. did well - was a co-ed school with nice memories, a few fights with the bullys and rebellion to the teachers I did not like - it made all the difference - if my teacher was a prick I switched of.... so I did really well in Grade 5 because my teacher was Nica, fair and strict. (Saw her in J'berg 2 months ago and she remembered me)
12-16 - Senior School --- YUCK - man this is where the ball started rolling downhill - I did have friends, I wasn't lonely but did get beaten nearly every week for stoopid things... like not remembering a prefects name, or while getting beaten turn up late for a class to be sent to get beaten again ...
16 - Left school after O'levels - did a job for a year ... great...
17 -19 Family goes to UK for sebatical ... I start in the IT world, get exploited then get tired of this zero of a life, get sloppy turn up late & get fired .
20-21 - Became an Aupair for triplets - who have since become doctors and lawyers... and are my friends on fB
22 - A Complete waster
23 - 26 - Total shift - leave UK and return to Zim, did Art for 6 months to recover from being a complete waster.... then started Tai-Chi full time, Meditation .. all going well, got a job in the arts at the International School & part time chaffeur.
27-31 - Rock band -Programmed Special fx, website.. flash promo disks, posters... everything except being on stage...did get on a few times to play didge and make fx
32-33 - Back to UK - did voluntary work with homeless on a farm for a few months until I could not take the corruption of the councillers who left the street kids to the volunteers - so I quit and re-visited 3 months later and it had became a drug sex orgy...lady volunteers and broken boys who's only skill is manipulation, then I started a multimedia course in Glasgow - got threatened on the street a nd got scared, ditched the course and ran back to Zim.
34-35 -Life got better, Success with another Band, did all promo disks, site and flyers .... a great time which just came to a stop - no-one signed them up - what a fucking shame - 2 of them are dead now and one is sick ... the rest gave up on glory and play in pubs ....
36-38 -- I travelled Thailand for 6 months... learnt alot, never really found my feet since. ...
Now - Not sure where my feet are but I am standing.
just needed to get that out... messy career eh! I am going to say 21-38 have been a gap year for me.... ready to start college again somewhere once I find the feet on which I stand.