Aldin's Journey to Life

[Aldin]

Journey to Life

DAY 1

Journey to Life Day One Just do it. Stop judging and just do it, forgive myself and commit myself to change

This is the beginning. The beginning of a journey to life. A journery on which we will through steady applications of self-forgiveness, writing and self-corrective-actions, de-construct our current beingness, our current way of living, way of existing and re-construct it into a way of living, a way of existing in honour of all life in existence equally as one. This is in fact possible and all it takes is each one’s commitement, each one’s self-will to do so in fact and this here is but one place amongst many to reference, follow and see the actual possibility of self-change from the ground up through a process in time and space that is shared in real-time with all the actual experiences in-between the stating of an commitment to self-change to the actual manifested self-change. This might be seens as the actual progress, the actual path of self-change being walked, with each step leaving behind a footprint so the actual points walked to change self can be tracked. This journey is a commitment to self as life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to throw in the towel with my commitement to changing myself because I have fallen on a point that was part of the commitment application necessary to make that self-transformation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to give-up on and throw the towel in on my entire process of self-transformation of a specific point within me for fucking-up at another point that was / is part of the commitment application necessary to walk the self-change I commited myself to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in and as the very nature of giving-up, where I can see it comming through in each aspect of my existence wherever and whenever I have commited myself to self-change and taken self-responsibility for the points that exist in and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to immediatly after I fuck-up / fall on a point I commited and intended to change within and as myself, go into and participate within the back-chat of my mind telling me that I’m a failure and that I’ll never reach the goals I set out to reach.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate and go into a back-chat within my mind where I bombard myself with self-judgement and self-discouraging statements of being a failure and never going to reach my goals and effectively, for real change myself into what I commited myself to change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I cannot see the sequential outflows of events that lead me to give-up and fuck-up and fall on a point over and over again instead of realizing that I’m lying to myself and I’m in fact seeing the triggering point from which the sequential events flow out to the point of giving-up / fucking-up / falling on a point I commited myself to change within and as me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into that trigger-point , that one point, always, over and over again and then complain to myself and judge me for being a failure and that I’ll never reach my goals and change myself as I intended to do so before within a self-desciosion statement I made within one singular moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that because of fucking-up / falling on a single point over and over again means automatically that I’ll never get it and that I’m a failure and will never reach my goals and chnage myself within and as as I intended to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that the back-chats I have and participate in within my mind is valid and that it has any significant value to actually value that back-chat and the words that flow from and within that conversation in / with my mind instead of realizing that I’m the one that has given value of importance and relevance to those conversations in my mind as back-chats, defining them as being important , relevant and true.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give the conversations in my mind as back-chats a value where I see those back-chats as important, as relevant, as true and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that because my mind says so it must be true, it must be real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my mind to determine the values I have about things instead of determining the value of things according to common-sense and what’s best for all myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I’ll never be something or live as something I intended to be / live / change me within and as because my mind tells me so instead of realizing that my mind tells me so because it is a statement, a point, an allowence and acceptance within me that I’ve conditioned and accepted and allowed to become me in manifestation over a long time as my life-time.

Within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my mind for throwing discouraging words and phrases at me that I believe in instead of realizing that after all it’s me that believes in that and that at some point in my life I’ve created the points my mind is throwing at me, actually showing the points I’ve created in my life and have come to accept and allow to exist in me and live according to these acceptances, allowences and self-definitions.

In that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to stop blaming my mind for tempting and pushing me into failure / falling and giving-up instead of taking self-responsibility and realize that I’m the one who gives in and the one who actually commits the actual action of falling, failing, giving-up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame and within that trap myself in a time-bubble where I’ll waste time blaming and complaining and looking desperately as to how to stop and change instead of actually starting changing in the physical through actual physical action as writing and speaking myself out of my self-accepted and self-allowed patterns that ‘bother’ me, that ‘stay in the way’ of living effectively without limitation as equal and one as what’s best for all life.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to waste time blaming and complaining and within that desperately looking for a point with which I can finally nail the reason why I always fuck-up / give-up and fall on a point down for-ever instead of realizing that that very search for that one magic point that’ll solve all my problems and relieve me from all this burden I exist as currently, is the actual trap that exist as the Design of Wasting-Time.

In that I forgive myself for not accepting and alloweing myself to live the change, apply actions that ‘lead to’ the self-change immediately and all the time, instead of blaming, complaining, seeking to find a magical point that’ll make it all so much easiert to accomplish self-change – because it’s the actual trap.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to complain about having fallen at a point and go into a feeling and state of desperation and feeling like a failure and believing that I’ll never get it; instead of simply picking myself up and stand up again for I have simply fallen at the point, and if it’s again that I’ve fallen, so be it for I still can simply get up and get back on track again, always.

Simple. Simplyicity. Do not over-complicated things.

I forgive mysef that I have accepted and allowed myself to over-complicate things with regards to falling on a point or fucking a point up wherin I’d in such a scenario go into a feeling and state of desperation, helplessness and hopelessness and feel like a failure and talk me into accepting and acknowledging the belief that I’m a failure and will never reach my goals, my commitements I made / dedicated myself to; instead of simply seeing the point as it is, in it’s core-simplicity, which is: I’ve fallen at a point, so I pick myself up and stand-up again, get back on track and continue the commitement of self-corrective-action, self-forgiveness and writing till I stand without falling.

I commit myself to pick-myself up and stand-up again, get back on track and continue living my commitements of self-corrective-action, self-forgiveness, writing and self-honesty if I fall on a point in living my commitments and that I’ll not over-complicate the things and go into self-created states of energy within my mind where I’ll feel desperate, like a failure and talk me into accepting and acknowledging the belief that I’ll never be effective at living my commitments without falling, for I also see that this behavior / pattern sets me into a time-trap where I’ll not apply and live the actual physical actions that are necessary and required to ‘bring about’ the ‘desired’, the commited self-change.

I commit myself to standing up and living my commitements till I live them effectively each and every single day of my existence without every falling.

I commit myself to walking this point as process of / as self-change and stop all doubts and ‘stumbling blocks’ as beliefs, ideas, emotions, feeling, thoughts and / or back-chats that try to persuade me into acknowleding the belief that it’s not possible and that it’s just not my destiny, what I’m created to be; for I realize such pile of bullshit as being just that = bullshit that comes up in my mind as it is an automated response that I’ve created which reflects my nature which has become the nature of giving-up.

I commit myself to chaning my very nature which exists as the point of giving-up essentially at the moment, where I’ll through my mind through automated responses in form of thoughts, feeling, emotions, back-chats, beliefs, ideas, pictures try to create a reason that I acknowledge as being true / real for giving-up wherein I’ll 99.9% of the time end-up acknowleding it and commiting the actual action of giving-up; and change that self-nature into a constant, stable point of / as doing what’s best for all life equally as one.

I commit myself to ‘carrying out’ the actual physical actions that are required to accomplish the point of actual self-change wihtin myself and not trap me into times, time-frames of going into states of energies created in my mind where I judge and talk me down for falling, failing at a point of self-change.

I commit myself to walk this process, however hard it might seem or be from time to time, for I understand that it must be done and that if I do not do it, who else will.

I commit myself to myself within walking this process of self-change to the point of creating myself to live what’s best for all life equally as one always.

I commit myself to stop gibberish back-chat in my mind, through which I ‘talk me down’ and stand in my own way of standing-up and commiting myself to self-change.

Till here no further. It is said. It must be done. It will be done. I do it. I stand as these commitments.

[Aldin]

DAY 2 BOREDOM AND ME

I’m so bored.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bored because of not having anything to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bored because I have finished and completed all tasks and activities that needed to be done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to supress the inner voice within me when I’m bored, when I feel bored, that tells me to take a point within myself and write about it and apply self-forgiveness because I do not like what that inner voice suggests to me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that that inner-voice suggesting me to when I’m feeling bored and not having any other tasks at hand that require to be done – to self-direct myself to investigate and take a point wihtin myself and write about it and apply self-forgiveness if required and commitment-statements that I live, is the actual voice of self-honesty.

In that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within the supression of the voice of self-honesty seek to find a point or activity or task to do so I do not have to self-direct myself to align myself to living the principle of / as life as experiences of positivity which I like experiencing and feeling are subject to maintaing ignorance towards the things I deem negative and that once I stop ignoring the negative things, the positive illusion of my mind will drop and no longer be here, so I’m actually living in an illusion, a sperated world within myself, trying to protect myself against all experiences / points I deem negative so I never have to face myself and physically do things myself to bring about an change that is needed to manifest a existence where all life is honoured and we exist in equality and oneness with / as everything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become subject and addicted to experiences I like and deem comfortable – namely such that do not require any ‘effort’ / physical action / doing from my side because it’s how I’ve conditioned myself over the years of my life, always preffering the easy and quick way and never the way that requires me to physically do things myself to bring about a change within and as myself and this world / existence.

So, I commit myself to recognize and utulize any moment of boredom, moment where I feel bored because of not having anything to do because I did all the tasks, activities and things I had to do – to self-direct myself to create new tasks for me to do that are relevant / part of the process of self-direction: Be it taking a point and writing about it, applying self-forgiveness, writing self-commitment statements, reading someone elses blogs about their process of / as self-direction / self-living or reading / watching / doing anything else related / relevant to taking and making another step towards self-purification to Equality and Oneness; towards manifesting / creating a world / existence that is Best for All Life in every way.

I commit myself to stop seeking positive feelings and experiences of comfort and I commit myself to physically do the things required from my side to bring about self-change and within that a change within this world / existence to the point where All Life is honoured and respected equally.

I commit myself to anytime and everytime I seek positivity and comfortability through mind-participation and ignorance towards the physical – to use that point of seeking to remind me to physically move myself to do the things and take the actions required to change myself and within that the world to a place where All Life is honoured and respected equally as one always and in all ways.

I commit myself to anytime and everytime I supress the physical reality through ignorance and positivity through my mind – to use that point as a trigger to physically move myself and do the things and take the actions require for self-change and within that a change of / within this world / existence.

I commit myself to stop tending to positive and comfortable feelings and experiences that are generated by the mind through my ignorance of reality as the things I deem negative, as it is so much easier than facing the physical reality ’cause it require actual ‘effort’, as in requiring actual physical action from my side to accomplish change and move / direct things and I commit myself to understand and acknowledge everytime I tend to go into the mind to generate positivity and comfortability through ignorance of reality as the negative – that the physical is the real thing and the mind the illusion and that the real thing requires MY ass to move and direct the situation to the point I ‘wish’ to change that is always Best for All Life.

I commit myself to physically move MY ass and direct myself within situations to the point of changing a point till it is Best for All Life.

I commit myself to the physical change required to bring about a change in existence to the point where existence is what is Best for All Life.

I commit myself to any actions required to change myself effectivel to the point of what is Best for All Life.

I commit myself to life as what is Best for All Life.

I commit myself to self-honesty as it is the one key point needed to allow myself to change myself to the point of always pritizing life as what is Best for All Life equally instead of prioritizing myself alone as in self-interest.

I commit myself to changing myself and walking the journey of self-change, however long it may take, till I change myself to the point of existing as what is Best for All Life equally, till this is done.

I commit myself to change the statement ‘I am bored’ to ‘I direct myself to do things required to take another step forward towards establishing an existence that is best for All Life’.

Till this is done.

[Aldin]

DAY 2 MONEY IS MY LIFE FORCE

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear spending money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a drop in energy if I spend money.

I forgive myself that Ihave accepted and allowed myself to regret spending money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel unhappy if I spend money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel unhappy, frustrated and angry with myself when I spend money on something because I am left with less of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be unhappy being left with less money then I had before spending it.

I fogive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to the amount of money I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always fear not earning enough money with the job I have currently.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough money to buy all the luxuries I wanna have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to give away money, exchange it for some other good because I am giving away a part of myself for I have become money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience spending and giving away money as though giving away a part of myself, a part of my life where I am left lethargic, unhappy and regretful afterwards.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that money has become my fuel for daily living wherin I’ll crash and be unable to even walk without money instead of realizing that money is not who I am.

I forgive myself that I have allowed money to be my main source of energy that operates me and makes me live happily and be satisfied with myself and my life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that with enough money I do not have to consider and worry about the well-being of all life forms on earth because it doesn’t concern me for I have money, which means I am able to survive, fuck the rest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the mindset of ‘fuck the rest, I have money, I’m able to purchase survival’ instead of standing here within and as oneness and equality with all of existence, doing what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel happier the more money I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel less happy the less money I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself according to the amount of money I have.

I forgive myself that I have allowed money to determine the experience of myself, wherin I’ll feel happier and overall better the more money I have and less well the less money I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed money to become my living-energy, my living-force that drives me to do things instead of standing and realizing myself as the living-force and self-direct myself to do things necessary to bring about a change within self / existence that is best for all life equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed money to be my glycogen, wherein I store money in my bank-account so I can withdraw amounts needed and spend so I can buy shit that makes me feel good.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed money to be my sugar-high with which I drive myself into higher realms of mind-experiences where only I and my little world of wonderful and positive things exist, a world where the physical perishes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed money to be the master, and I it’s slave.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value money more then the wellbeing of every single life form and / or expression within existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place money over life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support a world-system where money is god and has a greater value then life, where life itself is sold as if life has a fucking price-tag telling the value of life instead of realizing that life is priceless, it is equal within all and it’s value cannot be expressed through numbers as what we’ve come to define through a world-system that labels things with numbers, supposedly telling a things value.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the value given to things currently is subjective to the value-giver and that life has no value that can be expressed through a system that places self-interest over all life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that life cannot be bought for you either have a life or you don’t, but you can’t go into a fucking store and buy you some life.

And within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the value of life is LIFE.

And so I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to value all life equally as what life really values, which is life equally within all that exist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn life into survival where money is god, determining about life and death of an individual.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe the world-system / monetary-system is logical, makes sense and is there for a reason for smart people must have known what they’re doing instead of realizing that it’s people who’ve been consumed with their self-interest, seeking more and more energy-highs through the driving life-force that has become money, wherin profit / self-interest was placed over life and methods and systems were established to harvest the source that gives life and energy which has become money.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I as each one is those power-hungry beings that seek energy-highs through harvesting more and more money so we can feel good about our selves and fuck the rest.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that it does not have to be this way and that an existence where life is valued as it should be – as life – is indeed possible and all it takes is this realization and all as one comming together to an agreement to give to each one what they’d like to receive themselves.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to walk self-forgiveness, self-writing, self-corrective-actions till I effectively elimnate and destory all points of self-interest that have forged life into a survival game – so I as all as one can manifest a world / existence where life can in fact be enjoyed again without worrying about one’s survival, wthout worrying if one can afford life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to burst into rage and fury when I see what we have accepted and allowed to become of ourselves and what we’ve done with life, forcing it into games of survival and purchase, wherin we even put price-tags on life, selling life as if life can be fucking sold – because I’ve given-up on the possibility and potential of a world where life is honoured and respected equally with and as all forms that life expresses within, as and through and because it doesn’t apply to my current reality for I am not in a position where I do not have that which allows me to enjoy life without worry for survival, which is money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to don’t give a fuck about the world and the way it operates and that there are in fact beings in this world that struggle with every breath they take while I create feel-good energies and worlds within my mind through money instead of considering those beings and such existences in this world / existence, for it’s common-sense and obvious to see if I but stop generating feel-good experiences in / through my mind and look at the physical reality !

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget what it means to be compassionate and carrying, for I turn a blind eye to the existence of violance, abuse and suffering of life within this world and existence because I have made sure or been lucky enough to come into this world having everything prepared for my wellbeing and do not realize that there are others with less fortune and that they are dying, struggeling and crying out of desperation and pain in this very moment and in every moment of each breath I take and within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to abandon all and every form of self-interest that exist in me and as me, as that which has been the reason for why such existences of suffering, pain and struggle exist while another enjoys even things they don’t fucking need, and through that decicate any and all time that is fucking necessary within my life, within existence to find a solution and incorporate a solution to this, wherin we can manifest and create a world that expresses honour and respect for all living forms life expresses within, as and through for ever and never again allow anything to exist that leads to the enslavement of life. For it is enough ! It cannot continue ! It stops right here, right now, with me, with each one as yourselves. Step by step, all together as one we will stop the abuse of life that has been going on for millenniums !

And so I commit myself to stop defining myself according to the amount of money I have, accepting and allowing money to create experiences for me according to the amount of money I have.

I commit myself to stop turning a blind eye and turning to ignorace is bliss to the existence of violance, struggle, pain and suffering of life within this world and existence and I commit myself to find all and any ways necessary and go to any lengths required to stop that which has lead to the enslavement of life and to any lengths required to create a world / existence that is best for all life equally, always.

I commit myself to be actually compasionate and carrying for all life through making sure I give all and everything required and necessary all the time, any time to make sure I abandon and destory for ever more all points of self-interest within me that stand in the way of considering the wellbeing of all life within all of existence equally all of the time and so make sure to exist as a point within existence that serves the best for all life equally always.

I commit myself to understand that what is best for all is also what’s best for me ’cause I’m included in All.

I commit myself to find ways to stop and change the current world-system, that puts price-tags onto life as if life can be fucking sold for an arbitrary, made-up value as if life has a fucking value that can be expressed through numbers and I commit myself to find and support ways / solutions that’ll create a new system that serves life, that honours life and respects life and values life as it’s actual value which is life itself.

I commit myself to stop all self-abuse and within that all abuse within this world and so allow life as what is best for All to come to fruition.

I commit myself to stop metabolizing money in a way that gives me higher experiences in my mind-reality where nothing and no one else but myself and my own self-interest exists and I commit myself to honour, respect and value all life equally no matter where or in what form it is found / existent within existence.

I commit myself to burst out into rage and fury and use that very rage and fury experience / expresseion, because of seeing / understanding what we’ve done to life, as self-directive ‘fuel’ with which I drive me within and as – in making sure I give all and everything all the time, any time to stop and destroy all forms of self-interest within myself and assit and support other parts as me in existence when possible / when I’m in a position to do so and if required, to do the same – so an existence as / that is Best for All Life always can come into fruition.

I commit myself to life !

Till this is done !

[Aldin]

DAY 3 THE “THE MORE THE BETTER” MINDSET SELF-DECEPTION

I’ve realized that I have a tendency to rush within my writing and self-forgiveness, be it spoken out-loud or written self-forgiveness because I fear that the overall writing quantity is less if / because I take time to express who I am with the most accurate words I can find, because that’d mean looking within me to find that word or words that express / represent most accurately who I am as my experience within a moment and / or in relation to a point.

So, basically saying that I fear and see ‘taking the time’ to find and use the most precise words that express myself as my experience within a moment and / or in relation to a point – as being a ‘waste of time’, time in which I could have written another sentence and so add to the overall quantity of the writing or self-forgiveness.

Lol, thinking and believing that more is better. Not just with writing and self-forgiveness but I can see this pattern play-out and exist in quite everything I live day to day. That pattern is actually a polarity construct that exist as the poles of ‘the more the better’ and ‘the less the better’.

‘The more the better’ being the one thought / belief extreme applyied in for example where I believe and think that the more writing and forgiveness I manage to do within a time-frame the better; where the focus is not on the quality / completeness of the forgiveness and / or writing but on the quantity – and the other extreme thought / belief as ‘The less the better’ being applyied in for example in my relationship I have created with nutrition – especially carbohydrates, wherin I think and belief that the less carbohydrates I eat the better for me.

Obviously it is clear that the quantity of things is not the overall-determining factor but the quality / completeness. It’s not really about how much writing or self-forgiveness I did – but about Who I’ve been within the application of writing, self-forgiveness and / or anything else – meaning if I’ve been self-honest and have given 100% all the time to express Who I am as my experience within a moment and / or in relation to a point – with the most precise words and have walked the expression / point through to it’s completion – or whether I’ve just scrambled something togeter into sentences so it ‘counts’ towards ‘having applyied self-forgiveness or writing or whatever’ in the belief that ‘more is better’ because apparently ‘more’ means ‘more self-honesty’.

And obviously the ‘The more the Better’ and ‘The less the Better’ principle thought / idea / belief / point is being applied throughout the world by everyone, for example food-production where the focus is shifted onto the quantity produced and not the quality and so the quality suffer from the focus on quantity due to more profit as self-interest being the goal / driving-force of such application.

Money, another example, where we exist in the belief and idea that the more money we personally at an individual level have the better it is, and within that we allow others to suffer from our self-interest within such application of ‘the more the better’ – because we do not give to everyone equally for ‘the more the better’ is currently only applied for self-interest, enhancing ones personal life and not including all and everyone within existence.

So the problem of the ‘The more the better’ principle lies within it’s utulization, and currently it’s only being utulized for the enhancement of ones personal life as a singular being within / as self-interest. When we could utulize the ‘The more the better’ principle in ways that is Best for All Life wherin we give to All Life what it needs to live abundently and without any worry, where all Life is taken care of equally in / through ways that produce the most optimum existence for everyone based on the individual life-form’s requirments and needs needing to be fullfilled to allow for it’s optimum existence.

Though the ‘The more the better’ principle still is not what is Best for All – though it can be used initially to ‘get to’ the point of What is Best for All.

The ‘The more the Better’ principle isn’t What’s Best for All because it doen’t stand as an absolute point, meaning that What is Best for All is absolute, there is no ‘the more ‘Best for All’ the better’ because what’s Best for All is What’s best for All – it can’t be done ‘more’. ‘Best for All’ is ‘all what is needed or required’ so that everything and everyone can live life at it’s optimum within and as equality for all. And that’s all that is needed. There is no ’the more of ‘this’ or ‘that’ the better. What is needed to esablish what’s Best for All is all that is needed and that’s it.

So looking at the point of self-application within that means that whatever amount of self-forgiveness or writing or self-correction is needed and / or required to purify self from self-interest and establish self into a point / self that is Best for All is all the amount that is needed, not ‘more’ not ‘less’ – no ‘the more the better’ – no ‘the less the better’.

So, as long as that principle application / mindset of / as ‘The more the better’ and ‘The less the better’ exist – one is not self-honest and What is Best for All does not yet exist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the mindset of ‘the more the better’ and ‘the less the better’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that the more forgiveness and / or writing I do, the better it is.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that within the mindset of ‘the more the better’ as in the more forgiveness and / or writing I do the better – the focus lies within the quantity of forgiveness and or writing done instead of the focus being on the quality / completeness of self-forgiveness and / or writing applied.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that more self-forgiveness and / or writing is better because it apparently means that I’m more self-honest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I can be ‘more’ or ‘less’ self-honest instead of realizing that self-honesty does not exist within ‘more’ or ‘less’ but is absolute as ‘Existent’ or ‘Non-Existent’ as ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ as ‘Here’ and ‘Not Here’ as ‘Self’ and ‘Not Self’.

So, within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I am either self-honest or not – but not ‘less’ or ‘more’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as the ‘The more the Better’ and ‘The less the better’ minset deception, not realizing that as long as such mindset exist within and as and is lived / applied by self – self-honesty and what is best for all does not and cannot exist.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that whatever amount of self-forgiveness, writing and / or self-correction is needed to purify self from self-interest and establish self into a point / self that is Best for All Life equally – is exactly the amount need to be done / applied / lived – no ‘more’ and no ‘less’ – no ‘the more the better’ and no ‘the less the better’.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that What is Best for All is exactly that – no ‘more’ and no ‘less’ – no ‘the more the better’ and no ‘the less the better’.

I commit myself to apply self-forgiveness, writing, self-correction and anything and everything needed to purify self from self-interest and establish self as a point / self that is Best for All – to the extent that is needed for such point / existence to come to fruition and that’s all – and understand / realize that there is no ‘more’ or ‘less’ needed / required, no ‘the more the better’ and no ‘the less the better’.

I commit myself to stop any and all applications and living of the mindset principle of ‘The more the Better’ in the context of Self-Honesty and / as What is Best for All Life because I commit myself to understand that the ‘The more the Better’ mindset principle is self-deception as it does not exist as an absolute point which ‘Best for All’ and ‘Self-Honesty’ and ‘Optimum Existence’ is / exist as.

I commit myself to do anything and everything needed to the extent / amount needed to produce a world / existence that is Best for All and not exist within the mindset belief / idea of ‘The more the Better’.

I commit myself to stop all any any application of ‘The more the better’ within the context to produce and enhance abundence within my own life as self-interest only and I commit myself to apply myself and investigate and stop any point within me that stand in the way of living what is best for all always and producing a world / existence that is best for all life equally.

I commit myself to stop the ‘The more the better’ mindset principle living within the intention to enhance my own life only within and as a self-interest application.

I commit myself to focus on the quality / completeness of self-forgiveness and writing applied, and stand within and as absolute self-honesty within the self-applications and I commit myself to not rush and take my time to find and use the most precise words I can find to express Who I am as my experience within a moment or in relation to a particular point and walk the point through to it’s completion and I commit myself to understand that it’s not about rushing and writing / applying quickly so I can add to the quantity.

I commit myself to take my time to produce the most effective and complete self-application as self-forgiveness and / or writing needed and not rush to aid to the quantity but remain within and / as the ‘quality’ / completeness of the self-application.

I commit myself to focus on the completeness of self-application as self-forgivenss, writing and self-corrective-action.

[Aldin]

DAY 4 RELATIONSHIPS, PARTNERSHIPS, FRIENDSHIPS AND I PART 1

So, what to write about today? Let’s write my day and my experiences within and throughout it.

Self-Forgiveness on what I’ve experienced today:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that my friend is angry with me because I did not want to eat fast food.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that someone else is getting angry and / or pissed with / at me for not wanting to do what they want to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience discomfort when being stable and assertive within my commitments as what I’ve set myself to do and live because I fear that others get angry with me for not wanting to do and participate in the things they’d like to do as what we together have done in the past.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to value friendship more then all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to risk and end my friendship with someone because of my principles that I’m living.

Within that I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to compromise my principles I’m living and I’d like to live due to the fear of risking a friendship and / or relationship with some individuals.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to put friendship over principle as the principle of whats best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to cause conflict through my principles I’m living because I do not participate in many things I participated in before with my friends and therefor fear that they’ll get angry and pissed at me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself within my living of and within the understanding of what needs to be done / lived to be and live as what’s best for all life equally because of fear to risk and lose friendships and relationships.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit friendships to just a selected few being that I choose according to likes and dislikes I have within myself and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from all and everything and everyone within existence through existing within and limiting friendships to just a few instead of existing within and as a friendship that includes all life as a family as the family of life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from all and everyone and everything within existence through existing within relationships where the very relationships are limited to just one or a few beings instead of existing within a relationship that includes all life as a family as the family of life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed friends and relationship partners to stop me within living my principles of and as the principle of what’s best for all life for I fear risking and losing the very friendship / relationship.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that what’s best for all life equally is the most important thing in all of existence and thus ‘more’ important then preserving friendships and / or relationships with just few.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that my friends and / or relationship partner(s) get mad at me because they are not the most important thing in my life but what’s best for all life equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I lose my friendships and relationships because they are not the most important people / things in my life but what’s best for all life equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to have to choose between my friends or relationship partner – and what’s best for all life equally because I don’t want to lose either of ’em, neither the friends / partners nor living the principle of / as what’s best for all life equally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to choose friendship and relationships instead of what’s best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to choose self-interest over and instead of what’s best for all life equally.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear to never have any friends and / or relationship partners for living and choosing what’s best for all life equally over the friendship and / or relationship / partnership.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having no friends and / or relationship partners because of choosing what’s best for all life equally over the very friendship and relationship – because I fear to be left alone forever.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being and existing lonely / alone because of living the principle of what’s best for all life equally because I within living that can never prioritize my partner and / or friends over the very principle of / as what’s best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to be hated by my friends and or partner for choosing what’s best for all life equally over them because I fear that I do not meet up to the requirements they might have and expect of me, such as that I treat them specially and better then others who’re not within the inner circle called ’friends’ or ’relationship’ / ’partnership’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I have to live up to others expectations they have about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always try so hard to live up to others expectations about me because I fear them getting angry at / with me and through that fear losing the very person as my friend and / or partner.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I must be able to walk alone within this process of living what’s best for all and stand in the face of any challenges and remain consistent and stable within that principled living forever.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my friends and / or partners talking shit about me to others and gossiping about me for choosing what’s best for all life equally over them as if that is something fucking bad or nasty to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe and see choosing and ‘holding’ what’s best for all life equally over friendships, relationships / partnerships and anything and everything else – as being something bad and nasty because I’m apparently turning my back at and stabbing a knife in my friends and / or partners back for doing so.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that choosing what’s best for all life equally over friendships, relationships / partnerships – is turning my back to and stabbing my friends and partners in the back because they are no more the special ones in my life – instead of realizing that what’s best for all is actually also what’s best for them because you and me – we’re both included in ALL of / as ‘What is best for all’.

And within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I need not be ashamed of choosing what’s best for all life equally over friendships, relationships / partnerships because of bizarre irrational beliefs I hold about that point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that choosing what’s best for all life equally as one over friendships, relationships / partnerships means / implies that I do not ‘love’ and / or ‘care’ about my partner and friends.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that my friends and / or partners think and believe that I no longer ‘love’ and / or ’care’ about them for choosing what’s best for all life equally over the friendship, relationship / partnership instead of realizing that by choosing what’s best for all life equally over the very friendship, relationship / partnership – actually implies and means that I in fact actually care for life and care for all life equally – no matter if I ‘know’ ‘them’ or not – and that this actually means that I will ‘love’ and ‘care’ about my partner and friends in fact and not accept anything less then who they really are as all as one as equal and that I will assist and support them with whatever they require assistance and support with to walk through their experiences and patterns so they can set themselves free from these mind patterns and learn to live and express freely without limitations that they exist within and through their current mindsets – because I indeed ‘care’ for and ‘love’ ALL life and so I ‘love’ my partners and friends in fact for real and prove that through constant living of what’s best for all life equally which includes them and me equally.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that doing what’s best for all life is in fact living ‘love’ practically and thus living and showing real ‘love’ for my partners and friends as well as I prioritize the wellbeing of all living things within existence equally which includes my partners and friends as well.

[Aldin]

DAY 5 YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE PART 1

There’s this guy in my direct environment, telling me today about his hypothesis – his theory – about life / living which he lived according to / by, which is that you live only once. The statement was done in conjunction with the allusion that you should / can do whatever you want to.

Thus stating that since we live only once we can do whatever the fuck we want to.

What about the possibility that we live just once because we live by this attitude / principle where we actually in fact do whatever the fuck we want to, not taking anyone or anything else within existence into consideration when we decide to do something but do it because it’s what we want to as it’s best for us from a self-interest perspective, where we do not equate or take into consideration the possible / potential consequences our actions or non-actions have on others within existence?

What if we are only given one life to ‘prove’ ourselves worthy of life while here in this ‘one’ life and since we don’t live within the context of what’s best for all life – where we only act within the interest of what’s best for all life – we are not given eternal life – we’re only having this one life, and this one life being our last life – because we aren’t worth of life for we don’t honour life equally for / within all?

And assuming this theory / hypothesis of / as that we only live once to be true, it still does in NO way IMPLY that we can do whatever the fuck we want to. Why’d we make such an implication / statement? Is it because we are assured to no longer be here to experience and face the consequences of our doing? What about those that still remain after we’ve gone? Do we leave the consequences to them to face and walk through? Would we like to have the burden of consequences of someone elses doing on ourselves? Why do we then do whatever the fuck we want to and not take others into consideration and that they’ll have to carry the consequences of our doing? We’re passing our ‘sins’ onto them. Each one is carrying the ‘sins’ of the fathers. The ‘fathers’ are us. Each one of us.

If we live only once, we should do the best out of it and contribute to and eventually in fact create / establish a world / existence where all life is taken care of equally to ‘achieve’ the best possible and optimum existence for everyone and everything – so the new ones that come into this world will find a world prepared for them that’ll assure their well-being and optimum existence throughout their entire life-cycle they spend here in their life. Isn’t it what we would like to find and experience when comming into this world, when being born into this world / existence? It sure is what everyone and everything would like to find and experience, don’t lie !

No one likes or prefers to be born into and find themselves in a starving world / existence / position / life that does not cover their basic needs to live and enjoy an effective / optimum life.

Beings that preach and live by the theory / hypothesis that they can do whatever they want to because we apparently only live once – are not trustworthy because they within the very statement of living by such theory / hypothesis imply that they’ll stab you in the back if they have to so they can have their and stand by their point of ‘being able to do whatever they want to’. You shouldn’t look up to anyone or anything preaching and living by such points, it may sound so ‘cool’ when someone does not give a fuck about anything and anyone and allows themselves to do whatever the fuck they want to and when they want to because it seems as though they are in a way ‘free’ – but do you realize that they don’t give a fuck about YOU either? They don’t fucking care about you and will deceive and ‘betray’ you if they have to, so they can have their self-interest point of ‘doing what every they want to’ and they might even be the people you consider or define as your best friends.

We’re all in fact existing and living by this principle of ‘doing whatever we want to’ and we’re even defending our apparent right to do whatever we want to.

(To be continued; it’s late here and I don’t have much time of the day left writing because I worked the whole day.)

[Aldin]

DAY 6 POSITIVE THINKING IS NOT A SOLUTION (RELATIONSHIPS, PARTNERSHIPS, FRIENDSHIPS AND I PART 2)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define Love as a feeling instead of realizing that all feelings are chemical processes taking place within the body as triggers by and through other chemicals and that Love as such will never change the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that Love can change the world instead of realizing that the Love being preached as the all mighty savior and solution to all problems by so many beings in this world is nothing but a feeling that is generated as an outcome of specific chemicals interacting and triggering reactive responses with other chemicals and components within the human physical body and thus Love is impractical to ever change the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I can change the world while sitting in my flat, surrounded by all things I dream of and sending Love thoughts into the unified field of existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in spite of all the proof that exist in this world – that such applications of Love and positivity lived by so many beings in this world already for so long has still not changed anything to the better but that the world is getting worse each year – still sit and preach the Power of Love.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that shifting Thoughts from Negative to Positive stand as the solution to all the horror we’ve allowed to be created within this world instead of realizing that existence doesn’t work like that and that I in fact do not understand the actual mechanics of existence and how things are created – but hold the thought and belief that I do know the mechanics of creation so dear within myself because I fear losing my status I self-proclaimed of / as being wise / clever / knowing and powerful.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and belief that Thoughts alone have created the world and existence we exist in today and that the solution is to turn over to positivity and thinking positive thoughts if negativity and negative thoughts have created what we’d like to change instead of realizing that Thoughts are of the Mind and a Form of Mental Energy and cannot change anyhting within the Physical as the Mind is less then the Physical and requires the Participator within / as The Physical to carry out / convert the Minds / Mental Energy as for example in form of Thoughts – into Physical Action to so over time through repetitive Physical Action create and manifest things within the Physical Existence and thus the Mind has in Fact no Power to Change or Create within the Physical Universe unless a Physical Part / Participant takes the Mind’s point / energy and lives it physically.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that only The Physical can change and create within and have a Direct Creative and Consequential effect within the Physical and that the Mind does not and needs a delegate within the physical to bring it’s point into Physical Creation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be the mind’s delegate the mind uses to bring it’s energies / points into Physical Creation through me as delegate living the energies / points the Mind ‘brings up’ within me and thus Physically create the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make the mind physical as this world / existence through allowing myself to be used and act as the mind’s delegate to create within the physical through participating in mental energies in forms of thoughts, feelings, emotions, ideas, pictures, desires and living these energies out within the physical through physical action.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that the Mind is powerful because it creates feelings that make me feel intimidated in it’s presence.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the Mind creates points that’ll put me down and make me appear and belief to myself to be less – so the mind can rise and stand in a self-created position of superiority as God over me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the Minds inferiority – superiority games, allowing the mind to be my God.

I forgive myself within that that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that Negativity as Negative Thoughts did not create the world / existence we find ourselves within today by itself, as it cannot, as the mind has no direct impact within the physical – but that this world as the horrific place / existence it exists as today has only been able to come into fruition through my physical actions and doings as a being with a Physical Body and thus a being that has the power / ability to create within the Physical Universe / Existence and within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that switching over from Negativity to Positivity will NOT EVER cause a change within the Physical.

I forgive myself within that that I have not acceped and allowed myself to realize that the only way I can change the Physical World that I have accepted and allowed to be created is through PHYSICALLY LIVING the solutions to the problems in this world and that the the problems itself harbour the solution to themselves in fact, and thus I can only change and re-create the Physical into what’s best for all if I stop living my mind and start living myself as self-honesty as equality and oneness with and as everyone and everyting as life within existence.

And so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to veil the truth before my eyes through thinking and believing that I can stop the horrors in, of and as this world comfortably from home while sitting and thinking positive and that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I must physically do / act the soutions as myself in every moment of every breath and thus accumulate the change I wanna see within myself and this world / existence over time and that I must roll up my sleeves and get to work within the PHYSICAL.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the PHYSICAL is the solution and key to Self-Realization and Creation of a new world where everyone and everything is taken care of equally to assure each one’s optimum well-being and existence.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize the Physical as Living Flesh as the Soluton and Key to Self-Realization and Creation of a new world that’s Best for All.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that it’s not to judge myself or anyone who’s living the illusion of / as the mind, thinking and believing that we can change and re-create the world into a better place – comforably from our homes, while thinking positivity instead of realizing that this realization is the perfect opportunity to stop and move-out from the self-created illusion and realize that we must physically live the solutions to this world as Self in every moment of every breath again and again till change is Here as Self and this Existence in Fact and Existence exists as What’s Best for All.

Within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the Mind is not the solution but the physical is.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I cannot find a solution to stop what has been allowed to be created as this world within that which has caused the problem in the first place and thus I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the Mind as Positive Thinking cannot be and stand as the solution to a better world because it’s the Living of / as the Mind itself that has caused the problem as this world.

And within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the soluton is and stand as the physical in form of stopping to live the mind; stopping to make the mind physical through participating in / living thoughts, ideas, feelings, emotions and all kind of energies originating from the mind – and start living self-honesty as self as the solution as what’s best for all – within the physical.

[Aldin]

DAY 7 MIND TIREDNESS VS. PHYSICAL EXHAUSTION

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel to tired to apply self-forgiveness and self-direct myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel tired for applying self-forgiveness as / and self-directing / self-applying myself because I’d like to do other things more then this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I am physically tired for physical action instead of realizing that the tiredness I’m experiencing is a Mind Tiredness as a form of resistance towards self-movement / self-application and that I am in fact able and capable of continuing the process of self-application as applying self-forgiveness, writing and self-corrective-application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the mind tiredness which is a form of resistance purely and make it a physical tiredness so I can talk myself into and persuade me to actually believe that my body is tired for physical action and needs sleep or at least rest in terms of not doing anything but sitting in front of the television or computer participating in entertaining stuff like movies, series, music and games.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the very response I get in form of thoughts within the experience of this ‘tiredness’ as ‘to sit and participate in entertainment like watching movies, series, listening to music or playing games’ already indicates that the ‘tiredness’ is NOT real but in fact a resistance comming from the mind to do other things instead of / to divert myself from applying myself within my process through / as Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that my body is in fact NOT tired but that I’m making myself believe that my body is tired while only my mind is tired – meaning that my mind is resisting any further self-application / self-direction and not my body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define this mind resistance, that comes in form of a tiredness experience, as actual physical tiredness while it’s not.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that if this tiredness experienced were in fact a physically originating tiredness – my body would shut down within minutes without me being able to hold my eyes open for very long – as it requires actual rest to re-energize itself through slowing down – as it always happens this way when I’m really physically exhausted from actual Physical Work.

And thus – I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that this tiredness experienced where I ‘feel tired’ to apply and direct myself within and as applications of self-forgiveness, writing, self-corrective-action – is in fact a mere resistance originating from the mind as the mind does not want to do work itself as it does not understand what it means to live as it prefers the easy way always which is to not do things itself but wait for others to do it for ‘it’.

Within that, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give-in to the illusion of perceived tiredness, thinking and believing that I am / my body is tired for physical actions as self-application through / as self-forgiveness and writing / speaking myself to freedom, instead of realizing and recognizing the perceived tiredness illusion as actual resistance coming from the mind and not a physically originating, actual, tiredness / exhaustion.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that actual tiredness which originates from the physical body being exhausted from actual physical work – signaling that it requires some time to rest so it can re-energize itself ‘in peace’ without strenuous physical actions / activities interrupting the body’s recovery process – is experienced by me each and every time I do strenuous physical activities and also as the day comes to an end and my body signals me, through me not being able to hold my eyes open any longer, that it is exhausted and needs some rest to recover / re-energize itself for another cycle called ‘day’.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to acknowledge and recognize the proof I have as myself that the perceived illusion of tiredness experienced in conjunction to self-direction, self-movement and self-application through / as writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action – is only another form of resistance veiled as apparent ‘tiredness’ because here I am – where I have started applying this self-forgiveness session experiencing exactly that ‘tiredness’ / resistance and being able to stop it immediately within a moment of self-realization and self-application.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I’m able to stop the tiredness experienced in conjunction to self-movement, self-direction and self-application as writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action – within a single moment of self-realization and self-application – whereas I wouldn’t be able to do so if it were real, actual tiredness originating from the physical body being exhausted from physical activities applied throughout / within a day.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that Mind-Tiredness is the energetic experience of the mind saying / stating ‘I can’t be bothered’ / ‘I don’t feel like it’ and is thus NO real tiredness but the mind not wanting to move / prefering other things apart from self-application.

I commit myself to recognize any moments where I feel ‘tired’ towards / in conjunction to self-movement, self-direction and self-application as writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action – as veiled resistance from the mind and thus stop it immediately as it is not in fact real as it is no physically originating tiredness through the body being exhausted from actual physical activities applied throughout / within a day.

I commit myself to recognize each ‘tiredness’ experience with following thoughts and conversations in my mind telling me to go and entertain myself through watching televison, listening to music or playing games or any other activity apart from self-application as in Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action – as an illusionary tiredness – being actual resistance from the mind to divert me from self-application as in Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action and I immediately stop, breathe and stop the illusion within a single moment of Self-Application and ‘continue’ to direct myself into self-creation of / as What is Best for All through Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action.

I commit myself to stop any and all resistances that are veiled as ‘tiredness’ where I make myself believe that the ‘tiredness’ experienced is in fact real as being a real tiredness originating from the physical through the body being exhausted from actual physical activities applied throughout / within a day.

I commit myself to recognize all moments of feeling / experiencing tiredness in conjunction to self-application, self-movement and self-direction in forms of writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-application – as being a resistance from the mind and not a tiredness / exhaustion per se.

I commit myself to unveil the actual fact and proof that the tiredness experienced towards and in conjunction to applying self through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action is in fact a resistance veiled in form of ‘tiredness’ as it is ONLY ALWAYS experienced in conjunction to self-movement, self-application, self-direction in and as writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action.

I commit myself to understand and realize that actual tiredness originates from the physical through the body being exhausted from actual physical activities within / throughout a day and that if the body is actually, really exhausted it will ‘shut down’ and I fall asleep within minutes – even against my ‘will’ and I commit myself to understand that the illusion of ‘tiredness’ experienced always only in conjunction to and towards having to apply myself and direct myself through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective-action – is only a resistance from the mind veiled in the form of ‘tiredness’ and that I can stop it immediately within a single moment of self-application.

I commit myself to stop deluding myself into believing the ‘tiredness’ experienced always only towards and in conjunction to self-application, self-movement and self-direction as in applying self-forgiveness, writing and self-corrective-action – to be real / real tiredness as in physical exhaustion.

I commit myself to test and assess each point experienced as ‘tiredness’ within myself within self-honesty and see if it is actual real tiredness as in physical exhaustion where the body is exhausted from actual physical activities – or whether it’s only resistance from the mind veiled in the form of ‘tiredness’ – doing this assessment through the fact that if I’m able to stop the ‘tiredness’ within a single moment of self-application – then it’s just resistance from the mind that is veiled as ‘tiredness’ towards self-application – otherwise it’s an actual / real physical tiredness as physical exhaustion as I will fall asleep / the body ‘shut down’ by itself anyway even against my ‘will’.

I commit myself to understand that Mind-Tiredness is the experience of the mind saying / stating that it can’t be bothered with / it doesn’t feel like moving / applying self and thus I stop any and all participation within such statement and self-direct myself immediately as the self-directive-principle within the understanding of what must be done / lived within and as self to create self as What’s Best for All.

[Aldin]

DAY 8 THE “I CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING” AND “I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING ON MY MIND” EXCUSE

Here I am, blank, empty, void of anything I can think of to write about, anything to apply self-forgiveness on. What’s there to write about? I can’t think of anything particular at the moment.

Does that mean that I have to have something on my mind, some thoughts first which tell me what to do?

Is this then still SELF-Direction?

Why’d I need or require to have something on my mind, some thoughts that tell me or direct me to apply self-forgiveness on, or write about or do something within my process, first, before I’d actually move into the direction of self-application?

But this is not SELF-Direction, is it? Clearly looking, self-honestly I’d say: No.

For SELF-Directing means that I direct MYSELF and to do so I need no separate ‘stimuli’ and / or ‘trigger’ an / or ‘point’ like thoughts or ‘having something on my mind’ that tell me what to do self-forgiveness on or what to write about.

So, stopping self-application within and through the applications of self-forgiveness and writing because of not having anything on one’s mind, not being able to think of anything particular to write about and / or apply self-forgiveness on – is but another excuse, another limitation and implies that no SELF-Direction exists yet but that I’m still subject within my application / direction to separate / outside ‘stimuli’ / ‘points’ like thoughts / having something on my mind.

And that without those thoughts as ‘having something on my mind’ / ‘being able to think of something’ to apply self-forgiveness on and / or write about and / or do any other self-application on / in relation to – I will be like a zombie: Lifeless, blank, with no Direction and will do Nothing.

So, SELF-Direction does not yet exist really, as SELF-Direction is Here as Self and does not require and is not subject to ‘having something on one’s mind’ and / or ‘being able to think of something’ in order to apply Self within and through the self-applications of / as Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action.

So, here I go, clear myself from all subjection to separate points I have subjected my Direction to and establish myself within that as actual SELF-Direction:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stop writing and applying self-forgiveness and / or not even start it because I can’t think of anything particular to write about or apply self-forgiveness on – as I have subjected my Direction and Application of myself to separate points outside myself that act as ‘stimuli’ for myself that tell me and give to me ‘points’ I can write about and apply self-forgiveness on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to subject my Direction and Application of myself to separate ‘points’ outside myself like ‘having something on my mind’ / ‘being able to think of something’ to write about and / or apply self-forgiveness and / or self-corrective-action on – that act as ‘Stimuli’ directing me and telling me / giving me ‘points’ I can write about, apply self-forgiveness on and correct through self-corrective action.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that requiring thoughts to tell me and / or ‘give me’ ‘points’ I can write about, apply self-forgiveness on and / or correct through self-corrective-action is not directing myself but being directed through my mind still.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the act of self-direction through Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action as ‘requiring and being subject’ to ‘having something on my mind’ and ‘being able to ‘think of something’’ to write about, apply self-forgiveness on and / or correct through self-corrective-action – instead of realizing that self-direction means to direct myself and be able to do so at will, in any and every moment I ‘want’ or will – like with the snap of a finger, simple as that. That is Self-Direction. That is directing myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to subject my ability to write, apply self-forgiveness and do self-corrective-action – to the requirement and need to ‘have something on my mind’ and ‘being able to ‘think of something’’ to write about, apply self-forgiveness on and do self-corrective-action on.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to when not having anything particular / specific ‘on my mind’ and not being able to ‘think of’ anything particular / specific to write about, apply self-forgiveness on or do self-corrective-action on – to self-honestly within and as actual SELF-Direction look at points within myself that still exist as separate within me that still stand within the way of existing, doing and living What’s Best for All Life, points that still exist as a point of self-limitation – and then write about that / those and do forgiveness on those. Like for example if I’m not having a distinct, particular and specific point to ‘target’ with Writing, Self-Forgiveness and Self-Corrective-Action – to in such moments take a look at my direct environment, my day to day participation within my world and Who I am within my day to day participation according to different environments, different people, different situations, all the personality-changes I undergo based on Where I am and With whom I am in a moment etc. because there are sure as hell a looot of points / things to write about, apply self-forgiveness on, correct through self-corrective-action and clear / purify / stop / change within myself. So there is no bloody excuse for Why I ain’t able to write about something for at least some years, though looking at and including / expanding the application of Self-Purification to the entirety of Existence – There’s sooooo much to write about, forgive, correct and clear / stop / purify / change within Self as the entirety of existence, that I’ll be busy doing so for at least the next 20 years. In fact do so Till it is Done – Till Haven is on Earth which is when existence serves life in any and every way possible: Existing, doing and living always as What is Best for All.

I commit myself to seek out and correct / stop any points that exist as separate ‘stimuli’ that I’ve subjected my Direction, Living and Application of myself to – and stand as SELF-Direction, directing myself within my process / living.

I commit myself to realize and establish myself as actual SELF-Direction, realizing and understanding that within SELF-Direction I must be able to do so in any and every moment at will – with the snap of a finger.

I commit myself to challenge myself in any and all ways to proof to myself and make sure that I’m always in any and every moment in fact SELF-Directing myself and not subjecting my Direction and Application of myself throughout this Process and my Existence to separate points that I believe I require to be able to move into a Direction and apply myself – such as the requirement to ‘have something on my mind’ and ‘be able to ‘think of’’ something to write, apply self-forgiveness on and correct through self-corrective-action.

I commit myself to SELF-Direct myself to stop and change the things that exist within myself that exist as self-limitation and stand in the way of Living my Life as What is Best for All and I commit myself to realize and understand that I do not need or require ‘to have something on my mind’ and / or ‘be able to ‘think of’’ something to write about, apply self-forgiveness on and correct through self-corrective-action and I stop any and all such dependencies / requirements and subjection’s of my Direction and Application of Self and stand as SELF-Direction, directing myself and doing so and being able to do so in any and every moment at will – with the snap of a finger.

I commit myself to stop the excuse of / as that I have nothing on my mind and can’t think of anything to write about, apply self-forgiveness on and correct through self-corrective-action and therefor not do a thing / not apply myself / not write, not apply self-forgiveness and not correct any points – as I commit myself to understand that there’s so much to clear, stop, change and establish within and as Self and the whole of Existence as Self that I will / we will be busy for life-times till Heaven is on Earth – till Existence as a Whole with and as each being / expression within existence serving Life – existing, doing, expressing and living as What is Best for All equally always.

[Aldin]

DAY 9 THE FREEDOM TO DO WHATEVER ONE WANTS TO DO? (YOLO AKA YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE PART 2)

Self-Forgiveness Part:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live by and as and according to the philosophy / saying of / as ’YOLO’ / ’You only live once’ and within that connect the saying to the idea and belief that I can do whatever I want to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that because I live only once it means that I can do whatever I want to do and that it does not matter how others will be influenced – positively or negatively as a consequence of my doing because I want my ’freedom’ of ’free choice’ and resist handing it over and giving it up at all cost and will fight for it even till death.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the statement of ’YOLO’ aka ’You only live once’ has become the fight and claim for ’free choice’ just veiled / presented differently.

Within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight for and claim ’free choice’ because I want my self-interest point of ’having the right’ and being able to do whatever I want to without taking anyone or anything else into consideration of how the consequences my my actions might impact others within this world and existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I have a ’right’ to do whatever I want because it’s my idea of ’freedom’ and ’being not limited’ instead of realizing that all Life was / is equally given to all and thus all are equal as Life and so there is no ’right’ to do whatever I want to because ’whatever’ implies the allowance to also abuse and harm other life that is in fact equal as me as equally given and therefor I cannot place myself in a position higher then life / another because we’re all in fact equal as life as equally given to us.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to do without having to consider others and the consequences my actions or non-actions will / might have on others / life – is what ’free choice’ is and is what I’m fighting for and thus I’m fighting for the ’right’ to inflict ’harm’ unto life / others so I can feel special in the Power of ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to no matter what.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight for and stand for the ’right’ to do harm unto life / others through fighting for ’free choice’ which in it’s essence is the claim for the ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to do without regards to considering whether or not it harms life / others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire the ’right’ to harm others and veil this nastiness as what is called ’free choice’ and make everyone believe that it’s something good as it represents the ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my whole life to resolve around the claim for ’free choice’ as apparent ’freedom’ as ’free choice’ gives me the ability to do whatever I want to do which I think and believe to be something good instead of realizing that it also implies in its apparent ’freedom’ that it’s okay to harm life / others and don’t give a fuck about them / life because then I cannot do WHATEVER I want to and thus my ’freedom’ diminishes as I find myself equal to all as only being able to do what’s best for all then.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that if I give up ’free choice’ I diminish my apparent ’freedom’ and ability to do whatever I want to and will find myself equal to everyone else as I’m only left to do what’s best for all and this is something I do not want because I want to feel special and powerful through having that ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to without having to consider life / others as the consequences my actions or non-actions will / might have on life / others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to feel special and more powerful then life / others through hanging onto and claiming ’free choice’ as the ’freedom’ to do whatever I want to without being forced to consider life / others and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold and find myself that great and special that I place myself into a self-created mental position that is greater then life – thinking and believing that I am more then life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place myself into a mental position in / trough my mind that is ’more’ then life, thinking and believing that I am greater then life / others and can do whatever I want to through having the right of ’free choice’.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I am NOT greater then life and that there is nothing greater or more then life as all life is equally given to all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to claim life my own instead of realizing that I do not even fucking know where I come from and how I came into being and that the life I have / live and experience was given to me as it was given to the other being and expressions I see / that exist equally – and so I am not the god of / over life and not greater or more then life and nothing is thus more or greater then life as all life is equal as life as equally given to all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold the idea dear to myself that in life I can do to myself and others whatever the fuck I want to because I have ‘free choice’ and it’s my Life instead of realizing that it’s not ‘my’ life but that I was given this life and I am not even grateful for being given the gift of life, this ungratefulness being seen in how I treat myself and others within the claim to and fight for ‘free choice’ as disguised ‘freedom’ to do whatever I want to without having to / being forced to consider others / life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be grateful for being given the gift of life and the chance / possibility to explore / discover myself as life as equal to life as one with life as ‘I am’ as ‘I am life’ but instead destroy life through the fight for ‘free choice’ as the fight for the ‘freedom’ and ability to do whatever I want to without having to / being forced to consider life / others.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the only ‘freedom’ I have in Life is to do whatever is Best for all life equally and that that would be the practical living of gratefulness for the life I’ve been given / gifted with as all others in this existence have been give / gifted with equally just like me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the only ‘free choice’ in life is the choice I can freely make to do what’s best for all life and that if I do not make that choice freely as my own self-decision within the understanding that all life is equal as all were given life equally as I was given / gifted with it – I will not have the ability to claim the right for life / to live and will be eradicated from the face of the earth / the face of life because I refused to make the choice freely to honor all life as equal as me as equally given / gifted with – through doing / living what’s best for all which includes me as well – and that this eradication is proven to exist through the existence of Death.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to claim to have free choice even within the evidence being throw right into my own face that I cannot have ‘free choice’ because I’m not even able to stop death from visiting me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the life I have is not mine and that this is proven through Death where the life I claimed to be mine, is being taken from me.

And within that I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to honor life and be grateful for being given and gifted with the most beautiful and precious thing of all things – which is LIFE – and show that gratefulness through doing / living what’s best for all life, as all life is equal as it was equally given to everyone just like myself, which is the practical living of honor, respect and gratefulness for Life as the Life I was given and gifted with.

I commit myself to stop fighting for and claiming the ‘right’ of ‘free choice’ as I understand ‘free choice’ to be the disguised version of the claim to the ‘freedom’ to the ability to do whatever I want to do without having to and being forced to consider life / others as the consequences my actions or non-actions might / will have one life / others.

I commit myself to understand that ‘free choice’ in its very nature and implication of ‘freedom’ to do whatever one want’s to do no matter what – also implies that it’s okay and allowed to harm others / life if necessary so that the ‘freedom’ of actually doing WHATEVER one wants – survives / stands and thus I commit myself to stop any and all indulgence and participation in such ‘freedom’ as it is not what’s best for all and stands in disrespect and dishonor and ungratefulness for the LIFE I was given and gifted with just like everyone and everything else.

I commit myself to understand that the Life I claim to be mine is not mine and that it was given to me and that it was given to everyone else equally and thus we are all equal as life as equally given to us and within that I commit myself to stop placing myself mentally, in my mind, into a self-created position of superiority and power over life, claiming to be greater then life / others – as I understand that all Life is equal – as Life is Life – Equal within and as all as Life.

I commit myself to always do what is Best for All as I understand that the only ‘freedom’ to do within Life is to do what is Best for All and that if I do not do it I will be swept of the face of the earth / life which is proven to be so through the very existence of Death – where the life I claimed mine is taken from me as I did not honor the life I was given equally within all and did not give life to others equally as I was given it through doing what’s best for all life as equal to me as equally given to all.

I commit myself to be and show gratefulness for the Life I was given in fact = practically – which is done through LIVING / DOING what’s Best for All.

I commit myself to never give up till this is done and all Life is in fact ‘free’ as the ‘freedom’ to have and enjoy Life without fear for survival.

I commit myself to do what’s Best for all within my life and do anything and everything possible for me to assist and support with the bringing-forth of a world / existence that is Best for All Life equally – whether or not I only live once – it doesn’t matter – what matters is Life.