Hi Matt, from what you wrote it seems you are walking two separate processes. The first process being to writing self-forgiveness in comments on youtube videos. The second process which seems to be more like the problem you are facing with, which has to do with entertainment and finding a balance of entertainment in your life. While reading your words I was reminded of an hangout I did with Sunette when it came to me facing my video game playing. You can watch it here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1Px5STLQAE
Basically, it is about a balance and you mention that. Now to clarify a point here, because its unclear where you stand within your self-forgiveness process. So I can share where I stand within self-forgiveness, because it seems you are focusing on self-forgiveness as the point that needs to come through more in your life. So self-forgiveness in how I live it in my life is that it is a tool I use to resolve issues, problems, or botherings in my life. So the first thing I do before I apply self-forgiveness is to already recognize I need to apply self-forgiveness. So there is a step there where I am aware that I have a problem in my life, or in this moment. How I walk my process is that as soon as I recognize I have a problem in my life I immediately go and fix it. Here I can use the tools of writing, self-questioning, self-forgiveness etc... After I resolve the problem I actually feel quite good. So it is rewarding to do so. I feel lighter, like a burden has been lifted.
So you can, if you want, compare what you are walking now with self-forgiveness to what I describe I do, and see if you want to improve or change how you approach such moments of your everyday life. So for me discipline is when I see there is a problem, I immediately, always, move to fix it right away. And sometimes the challenge is in just recognizing there is a problem. For many, that is the toughest first step to make. I have spent time stuck in a point because I didn't recognize I had a problem, so I am speaking from my experience.
Doing self-forgiveness is always cool, so writing it on youtube is cool. I am more addressing your own benefit, and what is best for you, and what you need in your life as support. So take what supports you from my words! Enjoy!