I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be stimulated within myself if i see a guy with muscles, handsome face, and tall lean build.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to follow the thought that ‘i like this guy, he is cute’ direct me into honing in on such a guy and within that go into an equal depression state where i will create the experience that i am not good enough for such a guy.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself based on who i will interact with and who i will stay away from based on the way i am ‘attracted’ to men, when i see, realize, and understand i am simply following a picture within my mind and in that following thoughts that i am attracted to them, when in reality i am only following because i have programmed myself to believe that men with muscles, tall and lean, and have a handsome face will give me a good life, keep me entertained, and keep me safe through movies of such men having this same picture as the hero who save the women and save the day.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to associate men who are tall, lean, handsome, and muscular to be good guys who will treat me with care and respect, when i see, realize, and understand that this is not a basis of who a being is based on the way they look and thus is limiting within finding out who multiple people are regardless of a picture presentation, which says very little through the mind.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to associate success, safety, and enjoyment with handsome, tall, and muscular men and desire that as a partner.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be blinded by the picture of the being and become lost in the picture as my desires to have that, and have the imagination dream i conjured up of the beautiful house, beautiful children, money success, and intelligence, where i would be the perfect women in such a dream world and then within that define myself as perfect if i could get that guy.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to chase a feeling as having this perfect life and dream of the ultimate living with another, when i see, realize, and understand that this is not something that is based on looks and how the image presents itself and how i feel about it within my body about looking at them, but it is about how in fact the creation of such a life is based on the physical movement and determination to have such a life as well as aligning it to a world that is best for all life, which is who i am within what i create in my life.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to have a perfect life and base it on an imagination through the image of a specific looking male, not seeing, realizing, and understanding how i am trapping myself to a illusion that does not in fact exist as what actually matters is not what the being look like, but who he or she is within their living principle as themselves, how the treat themselves and others that says volumes.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at the reality of such a scenario when i see i am actually to much feeling insecure to go and talk to such a guy and thus self abuse myself as my picture, blaming my body and my face for not being good enough, hating my body and face for not being good enough, and being jealous at those perfect looking couples with the perfect guy and perfect female, and being spiteful toward such a couple in my mind because i see i can not have that based on the way i perceive myself and my own body.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to abuse myself and my physical body based on it not living up to the expectation i have taken in and adapted as my self image and thus go into resentment, physical and mental abuse and bullying toward myself, hating and sabotaging myself based on the beliefs i have created of self harm and self deprecation, and thus go into the belief that i am not good enough, i am a victim to others, and become spiteful, jealous, and attackative towards those whom i see are living this relationship and desire that.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to define myself through the image of my mind as thoughts, beliefs, pictures, emotions, expectations, and desires and through this miss the simplicity of who we are here, all each and everyone as life, as the physical equality and oneness that exist, and thus i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not recognize and appreciate the unique expression that each individual has to share and offer, and within this find my own unique expression and create with it that which is supportive for all life as my own self expression.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to harm others based on my own separation of myself as life within me and thus live it, and so create abuse, harm, and havoc within myself and outflow this onto others whom i harm with looks, words, and resonate behavior that is not supportive for life here to flourish, but allowing and accepting myself to be degraded and thus degrade the potential that is here with others as we create.
I commit myself to let go of the image of my mind as pictures of muscular men, as i realize this is a trap to go into self compromise, judgment and comparison. I commit myself to instead live the words self appreciation, unique expression, physical, and find words that support the expression in others that i can see in them and thus equally support myself to live equally so.
I commit myself to flag any thoughts of comparison with other women and release myself through breath, living the word equal beings, and expressing in those moments with communication and understanding to get to know who the person is beyond the image in my mind.
I commit myself to move beyond image and make efforts to understand each one’s unique expression as i equally live these words for myself and push my self creation in my living.
I commit myself to stop all backchat of comparison and desire of being someone else, and move into my breath, and create with what is here, move myself in the physical, and create something useful and substantial for a better world and a better self.