Well, at the beginning of walking my process, I faced the desire of commit suicide too, the cool point is that exposing the suicide, we trap ourselves as the ego = self-interest - so well, I started to clean out the desire of suicide, I mean, starting view point by point how that desire appears - and I started to realize that I cannot run from myself, that suicide is the easy way to run away, and that this physical existence is our opportunity to walk the process in space/time, with our self-dishonesty on a golden platter. So, I really occupied my existence considering suicide, and then I realized that I have had many doubts and that this doubts were taking me to a point of anxiety and desperation, so, realize this: if one fears death, then one desires to die to get out of that fear.
Ok, so how fear to death?, see, I've had preconceived ideas/beliefs/perceptions about this process so when I started to see the reality of the process my self-interest platform about the process started to shatter.
So, how this doubts and fears would take me to the suicide point?, well, I could have a doubt at anytime, and I was not answering my self-doubts, so that doubt trigger a pattern, the doubt taking me to the fear, the fear to the anxiety, the anxiety to blame, the blame to frustration, and the ESCAPE from all of this, is clearly the opposite = finish all this shit easily = suicide.
SO, the practical solution about DOUBTS, write your doubts - and suggested to share in the forum - and gently push yourself to see the pattern that I'm mentioning here.
Realize that you can answer your doubts, but to start doing this, is required to write, because we're in the belief that we are or thoughts, so if you believe yourself to be a doubt, so then you can see the whole picture and how you're able to answer yourself - stepping out of self-interest about yourself - then starts the process in and as the outter.
And, about desires, I suggest to check all your desires man, and viewing them according to fears, realize that the desire of suicide is the flag that you're actually starting to view your own responsibility, so, I suggest to expose to yourself all related to suicide, and check all your wants/desires = self-interest that is causing your world to shatter.
And within this, remember, the desire is the fear counter-part, if you desire, you fear.
So, I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that my desire for commit suicide is in fact the escape to the fear of death, so then I would be able to stop the fear, without realizing that the fear of death is the result from my preconceived ideas and perceptions thus doubts about the self-correction process, because I see that I was taking this process at self-interest, thus not realizing that is not about my desires and dreams, but equalize myself into and as what is best for all life.
I commit myself to write down and self-forgive all my desires, and the fears that manifests those desires, because I realize that the desire is the counterpart of a fear, so then if I have a desire then I have a fear too.
I commit myself to write down and self-forgive any doubt, because I realize if I believe myself to be A doubt, then that doubt drives me into fear, and the fear into anxiety, and the anxiety into judge, and judge into blame, and blame into frustration, and frustration into depression, thus the easy way out to all this pattern without facing myself is the suicide, so I realize that the hard way is to face myself, and see what I don't want to see = that I have pre-conceived self-interested ideas and perceptions and beliefs about the self-corrective process, so these are the manifesters of my doubts, because I understand that the material is specific, so I'm responsible for myself as the ego about the process.
Ego = ideas/beliefs/perceptions/judges/doubts about self, thus about others as self.