Welcome to the forum.
I suggest you read the section about the Portal in the Destonian Wiki
for perspective on what the portal is. I suggest you also describe why you see yourself as a gate/portal, so that Sunette can give perspective here.
If you'd like to learn more about Desteni and what we stand for, I suggest you walk the free DIP Lite course
. You can also read others' writings on the forum, or make your own thread in the Writing Yourself to Freedom section
Additionally, you will find a ton of support and information on the EQAFE
Finally, please read the forum guidelines
in case you haven't read them yet.