we all can understand you here given you share yourself and do some consistent writings and sharing that within this group, and eventually you will come to realize it is to understand yourself, we all here can only be of assistance and support as we have walked out own processes/stories/history's.
through "knowing thy self" we can take a stance of self responsibility within ourselves and thus our realities, realizing we are responsible for ourselves.
I can say with a hint of assumption that everyone here has walked through addictions and many of us, most, probably 99% that have stood as this point of self responsibility have successfully walked our addictions and stopped them, I myself have gone through drugs/alcohol/sex and porn, it is journey and we welcome anyone to weak this journey to new life - simply put on your boots for change and start walking, its long worthy walk.
I am looking forward seeing more of you here. welcome and enjoy.