Greetings & welcome here. I surely would like to see that you can stay with us. However that would requier for you to come down from your high horse. You seam to think that you are something "better than" of "more special" than any other (of us). Such views are very blinding and speak also very much about abuse. Like the support that is already given, I ask of you to learn some humbleness, to life, some respect, and to know that what this process is about is to learn to live life - again. To come down, to be honest with self. I learn this some years ago, then walking with demonology and further - to learn that what ever thoughts or believe I have - about me or the world - they are deceptive and not real - physical reality is key- rather, thoughts and beleives stand in separation from life. Again, the thoughts and the believes they create in our minds, over time, is the poison that pollute our planet. So when you look in the mirror and see you, take note (with pen and paper) of all that you see. EVERY morning for some months - note it down - all in self honesty. Then apply the needed self forgiveness - for all that you see - every detail- to be able to RELEASE yourself from your mind addictions. This is my suggestion, my support. We are all in this - and there is no one that is more special and need to be treated like "royalty" - as you seam to believe about you. Come down - breathe, write (!) forgive, lets delete the old pre-programe and believes with forgiveness of self.
Self forgiveness takes time and consistency. Dedication, Humbleness...
Prove it to yourself that you have it within you. No one else.