Because I have been asked what brought me to Desteni, I decided to post my story here by means of an introduction.
I found Desteni about 12 years ago. I was heavily into conspiracy research and via this conspiracy research I rolled into research on spirituality and 'ascenscion' - and this is where I came accross Desteni material (presented to me by my sisters). At the time I was not really interested in 'changing myself', I was more looking for an easy way out through ascending to the 5th dimension! That was a big bummer, especially with the video done by 'Jack' through the Portal, on the topic of 2012. The funny thing was that I knew this already, I knew I was lying to myself about ascending and 2012. Jack called it what it was: bullshit.
The take-home message from Desteni for me was: everything I had been doing was pretty much useless. Meaning: all the meditation, the projecting, the visualising, the hoping... The reality was that there was a big problem. And this problem was... me (self). The messages coming though the portal were explaining how I am at the source of this creation yet I don't know how I am creating it nor how to stop it??? Desteni was saying, we are deeply screwed, and it will take 'at least' 7 years to walk ourselves into correction, to bring through our life expression. Even though this all sounded very daunting Desteni offers a 'solution' that was 'practical' and 'managable': self-forgiveness... It took me a lot of reading before I began to understand what self-forgiveness meant practically speaking, and it was only after I decided to actually start practicing it (by reading Jack's and Veno's Self-Forgiveness lists out loud) that I began to 'get it' and 'what it meant'. Going back to that moment when I made the first 'click' in how to speak self-forgiveness, what stood out for me was that I specifically used Breathing very deliberataly, following the steps as explained in the video about 'Self-Honesty'. I had never done this before. I took a deep inbreath and I would hold, and then when I am quiet inside, I would speak the self-forgiveness statement and it would burn like fire. Meaning: I experienced 'myself' coming through and 'sounding' in a way that I had never sounded before. This to me was direct confirmation that Desteni was onto something... something had been 'uncovered'. After this I started speaking self-forgiveness every day for months on end. I started participating with the forum immediately and joined the community.