christine's SF on 'warm and fuzzy'

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christine
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Joined: 17 Jun 2011, 19:03

christine's SF on 'warm and fuzzy'

Post by christine »

As I just posted in my recent blog, letting go of 'being warm and fuzzy' 'loving' was very hard and met with lots of resistance within and as me because 'who would I be if I wasn't warm and loving?

And slowly through my process seeing how this very expression just continued to enslave me and keep me in separation of who I really am which is Life - Love in Action not Love as a Feeling.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that the feeling of love was real and something to aspire to 'being more loving' being something to cultivate within and as myself in life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist letting go of the feeling of love as that is how I defined myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to 'teach' my children from a point of Love - as Love was the greatest "power' one could come from that it was the power above duality and changed you and the world which in essence did the complete opposite.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to experience shock and depression because I could no longer validate my experience of being warm and fuzzy 'loving' anymore.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to miss that part of me - which was my preprogrammed self- of relating to people in a warm and fuzzy way.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame myself for raising my children from a point of being warm and fuzzy and relating to them that this was the starting point in which they should walk through their lives.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress this warm and fuzzy feeling instead of just breathing and standing up - doing a mindfuck on myself and thinking I had stood up instead of just repressing these feelings of love, because I didn't want to let go of those feelings.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to secretly believe that I would 'lose my relationship with my family' if I was not warm and loving.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to repress the 'feeling of depression with regard to losing my family through not participating within and as a warm and loving expression.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that in resisting letting go of these feelings that I was really doing a disservice to myself, my family and the world because I continued to participate within and as separation of myself as who I really am.

I also observed how animals in nature express affection for one another in a pure self directed expression in the moment.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to direct myself in the moment as Life as Self through not participating within and as feelings of love towards my family and the world.

I am Life - standing up Here in Oneness and Equality.

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Maite
Posts: 575
Joined: 13 Jun 2011, 19:08

Re: christine's SF on 'warm and fuzzy'

Post by Maite »

And slowly through my process seeing how this very expression just continued to enslave me and keep me in separation of who I really am which is Life - Love in Action not Love as a Feeling.
Very cool realization, Christine. To pull the point through from self-forgiveness to self-corrective application, I suggest that you re-define the word 'Love' for yourself through writing down how you want to live the word 'love' as an action instead of a feeling in your daily life.

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christine
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Joined: 17 Jun 2011, 19:03

Re: christine's SF on 'warm and fuzzy'

Post by christine »

Hi Maite - thanks for the feedback.

Love in action to me is 'loving your neighbor as yourself' by seeing your neighbor/the person in front of you as yourself , one and equal - not loving someone from your mind in separation and in specialness.

By asking myself - is it best for all? Who am I in this moment? Directing myself in the moment - stopping and breathing and stopping the mind and the participation of myself as the mind by continuing my process one breath at a time.

Coming from a starting point of self-honesty (which I just really 'got' recently) instead of self-interest. Facing myself Here.

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