Why should we forgive others?

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Raúl
Posts: 341
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Why should we forgive others?

Post by Raúl »

I'm very interested in the process of forgiving others to forgive myself.
I find myself most of the time judging people very fast, like a quick opinion about my knowledge that pops up inside my mind the moment that I see the mind that is integrated in the body of another person, I see it very clearly and very fast and it's like my mind it's not satisfied until I see what the core of their minds is made of, and I don't even know why I do it, t's just something I do. I think it comes from a desire of power, of being powerfull in this society to progress into higher hierarchies, and it's dissapointing for me to say those words, but if it's what exists within me I can not deny it.
It could also be that I just see the information of their minds, I just see it. And it's after that experience of seeing it when I have a choice of using the information for supporting another person in their expression or for self-interest.

It's hard for me to forgive another when I see him doing something which is clearly wrong, even when I know that I myself have been very blind for most of my life, and I have also allowed myself to play freely in the game of 'I have no consecuence'. I find myself reacting to them and blaming them, basically making them responsable for a situation they are not yet responsable of, even when I know I have done the same. But I don't know why I don't feel like forgiving others, it's like why should I forgive a person who is not willing to take self-responsability?

What is the purpose of forgiving another when it's only you appling forgiveness?

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Kristina
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Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 21:18
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Re: Why should we forgive others?

Post by Kristina »

Hey Raul,

Very cool point to open up to discuss.

I think you have your answer/direction laid out in your own words...
Raúl wrote: It's hard for me to forgive another when I see him doing something which is clearly wrong, even when I know that I myself have been very blind for most of my life, and I have also allowed myself to play freely in the game of 'I have no consecuence'. I find myself reacting to them and blaming them, basically making them responsable for a situation they are not yet responsable of, even when I know I have done the same.
The point is only YOU can forgive YOU. You know if you are reactive towards someone for doing something you've done, then there hasn't yet been the effective forgiveness and thus understanding established within yourself and towards yourself.

The point is we are able to forgive others WHEN we forgive ourselves because through our self-forgiveness we develop an Understanding of ourselves and WHY we do certain things, or think certain things, and in that understanding, we are able to forgive ourselves because we get it. There is more to the story we are opening ourselves up to. We realize we were living in such a way where we didn't know better, and only now are we providing ourselves with another option/way/solution to 'deal with' our lives and who we've become. And so when we do that for ourselves, we will naturally do that for others, and forgiveness becomes a natural expression for ourselves.

So perhaps take 'others' out of the equation, and focus on where you can still forgive yourself for NOT forgiving yourself unconditionally. Where do you not feel like forgiving yourself? What are you still holding against yourself something you've done in the past? What haven't you forgiven yet?

We can understand that ultimately we will have to learn how to forgive each other, but the place to start is with yourself. Forgive yourself absolutely, and you will be able to forgive others absolutely. Self first - self-responsibility.

Raúl
Posts: 341
Joined: 09 May 2017, 02:22

Re: Why should we forgive others?

Post by Raúl »

Thanks! I have realized a lot in relation to this. I made some blogs, about self-forgiveness towards my external reality and about the difference between understanding somethng and reacting to it.

My conclution is, there is no reason for me to react to the behaviour of other people, what they do is what they do within themselves, it's a reflection of who they are and where they are at. There are no opinions I can or should have about it, it's something about them. I can use those points to look at my own self, and see who I am within those same points, and see if I still reacting or if I have understood it completely within myself and my life experience, and I have already applied self-forgiveness.

What has changed now is that now others are about themselves, and I am about me. The best way to help others if I am interested is by helping and supporting myself to be grounded within myself, and then if I make the decition I can share myself if I desire to, but it's not asked from me in any way, and I don't have to do it, I have enough with being responsable for myself, it's all that is asked from me, I can not controll other people, or even help them.

So, no reason to react to what other people do, it's what they do, it's not my responsability. As you said only me can forgive me, I can and should forgive my reactions toward other people, I can not forgive THEM. Also forgiveness with responsability, one where I remain clear exactly as I was the previous moment.

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SupremeRule
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Joined: 19 Oct 2018, 09:01

Re: Why should we forgive others?

Post by SupremeRule »

The point you're experiencing is in relation to how you see them out of line and you want them to be in line. Youre wanting to forgive them because they apparently cant do it for themselves or else they would be in line. You can correct the point for them but they Wil have to realize for themselves eventually. You can endlessly correct everything out of line in others and with authority this can be effective. But again as long as they do not forgive themselves they will continually stumble. You do not need to forgive them in this instance. Instead show them the correct way. They will accept or deny. You can show them the way for them to realize themselves which is through self forgiveness. If they will not forgive themselves after you have introduced it either once or countless times they do not want to and will not. Understand that people just being introducedbtobself forgiveness can utilize in an effective way through their self honesty but then again there is a large backdrop and context with which SF is utilized. Many times it is crucial to understand the context especially with analytic and technical types.
Christopher Cook
"The One and Only"

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