Bella's Journey to Life

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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 29 Apr 2012, 14:10

Bella's Journey to Life Day 16: Relationships of Destruction Manifest this World – It’s "Too Much"


Self-Suppression out of Fear of being 'Too Much':

I noticed there are moments where I will fear calling my partner or sharing myself, out of fear of being 'too much'.
This occurs especially when/after there's been an incident that was quite intense or where I have been quite demanding. Then I create this idea within my head that my partner's had enough of me and I should not bother him with anything else, because what if it gets 'too much' for him and he decides to stop the relationship.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to make assumptions about my reality - instead of realizing that without direct communication, I am always only interpreting things through the filters of my mind.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear being 'too much', which implies that I am on the one hand underestimating my world /my partner and on the other hand I am suppressing and restricting myself in an act of self-compromise to prevent 'loss'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to exist within fear of loss, instead of realizing that life does not own, life does not possess, life does not fear - it is the mind that creates these concepts and by following the mind and becoming the mind: we diminish ourselves, we suppress the life within ourselves and give our power away to the mind to direct and dictate who we are through what we are directed to do through the mind.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself to 'fit' another or 'fit' a relationship - when that is the very point that is often later used to 'end' a relationship as one blame the other /the relationship for one's own diminishment, when in fact it was self-inflicted from the beginning.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear being 'too much' for another - when in fact the statement of 'too much' is only reflecting my own consciousness, my own experience, my own definitions and mind constructs.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted the concept of ‘too-much-ness’ as real when in fact I can see it is an excuse utilized to not have to go into the nitty-gritty of our creation and take responsibility.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that based on the principle of oneness and equality we are always facing ourselves ‘equal and one’, and therefore what we are faced with in every moment is ‘equal and one’ to and as who we are and can therefore never be ‘too much’.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to consider that the perception of ‘too much’ is a result of postponement and procrastination; that the perception of ‘too much’ is the compounded accumulation of the moments we denied and suppressed, the moments we did not dare to face and direct ourselves in self-honesty; and therefore that things can never be ‘too much’ when we effectively and in self-honesty face and direct every moment as it is here.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I am ‘too much’ and I must be careful to not be 'too much', that I must a 'reasonable' person and remain within the 'reasonable' spectrum of what is 'known and acceptable' within this world/system in order to be worthy and accepted; and that if I am in any way different, I will be rejected, cast out, excluded.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear rejection, when that very fear is revealing to me that I have rejected myself, I have not accepted myself here as life, but have measured myself upon the 'values' of this world and the systems we exist within, systems that do not value life, and yet I wish to be valued as life by others when I myself am not valuing myself as life but measuring myself against systems of this world.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to accept myself as life.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself and suppress myself and then blame another/my world for my diminishment and self-restriction.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed fear to determine who I am and what I will share of myself with others - instead of realizing that within that I am existing as self-consciousness only, based in fear and set out to 'win' self-validation through 'acceptance' from others; instead of realizing that life requires no 'validation' as it is here, and that it is up to me to accept myself and live THAT which I want to validate as myself, make real as myself, manifest as myself as life.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to seek 'acceptance' outside of myself.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to share myself unconditionally out of fear of being rejected.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in the fear of 'destroying things'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to exist in regret about the things I destroyed in my life, the things I witnessed being destroyed in my life without me being able to do something about it; and within this I created a fear of things being destroyed, and as I gave into this fear I created a life where I do not allow myself to fully embrace things, because “what if they get destroyed” - then I am again faced with: 'loss'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to exist within a 'protection'-mode, wherein I protect myself from ‘loss’ - instead of realizing that within that, I am preventing myself from touching life, from living unconditionally, from walking every moment as it is here, from embracing life as myself and everyone/everything in my world unconditionally.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to exist within a cycle of destruction-hate-regret, wherein I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself and hate myself for everything that 'went wrong' in my life (from the marriage of my parents to the death of my father to my relationships with my mother and my family and world), then regret how I let it all happen (even though there was things that were beyond my influence) and then 'punish' myself through further destruction and negativity - instead of once and for all forgiving myself and moving on to truly Live, Expand, Express, and support others to do so as well.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that others/my world has to forgive me first, before I can forgive myself.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and abdicate my responsibility of forgiveness to someone/something outside of myself - waiting to be forgiven and 'validated' as 'worthy of forgiveness' before I can forgive myself.


I have lately begun to realize how I have existed in cycles of negativity and self-sabotage, cleverly constructed in the mind as the mind, creating a certain personality with certain value-judgments and mental-emotional perceptions about myself and my world that have been set to 'validate' my existence/experience, to 'validate' how I feel and that I have the 'right' to feel this way "because I am so fucked up", to 'validate' the abuse/self-abuse as a form of 'punishment' for the pain I've witnessed and/or manifested in my world...

I clearly see how I exist as self-consciousness and that it is not supporting me as life, not supporting life as a whole, not supporting the change I want to see in my world.

It is tough, and painful, to see what I see - yet I wouldn't want it any other way. I would not have preferred my eyes to remain closed to the truth of myself. Therefore in spite of the pain, the shame and regret I am facing - I am grateful for seeing and realizing HOW I've been existing, HOW I've been keeping myself in check, HOW I've been trying to control my existence, HOW I've been sabotaging myself and keeping myself imprisoned within patterns of the mind system as image and likeness of this world system.

Because only through Seeing and Acknowledging what is here and how it was created - are we able to bring forth a change in the world that will be Best for All.


I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for all the destruction I have witnessed and experienced in my life, including my parents' failed marriage and my father's death, and within this I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create self-punishment within self-sabotage wherein I have tried to eliminate pain and suffering with further pain and suffering - instead of simply learning from the failures and the pain I have seen to understand how this consciousness reality operates and from that understanding to become the solution for myself and my world and the children to come.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define myself through the failures of my world and my own failures throughout my life - instead of realizing that such self-definition is of the mind-system as a point of 'identity'/ 'identification'/self-consciousness that keeps me trapped within limitation through cycles of self-sabotage and self-abuse.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that by remaining within self-loathing in a polarity of self-pity and self-punishment, I am in fact keeping the world running as we know it as a system of abuse, deception and abdication of responsibility, where division and separation are the ways of the world and existence is divided into 'friends' and 'enemies', defined through value-judgments, blame, revenge.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to blame my world for my experience of pain, and to in a way try and take revenge for the pain through further pain - instead of realizing that I am doing it to myself, as I am not separate from my world.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where we exist divided and conquered by our own hand, where we separate ourselves from each-other and hurt each-other, not seeing that what we do to our world, we are doing to ourselves.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where, as we can see from history, we are trying to solve our problems through blame, revenge, punishment - not seeing that by doing so we keep history repeating and merely shifting responsibilities around, when in fact we are all equally responsible for what is here as this existence, because our existence is manifested as an outflow of how WE exist and co-exist in every moment.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to enslave myself within the mind as consciousness which is formed by this world as the image and likeness of this world - and therefore I should have realized that no real substantial solution can ever come from the considerations of the consciousness we have become, as the goal of consciousness is to sustain and validate itself in separation from life, in spite of all the evidence that its existence is a bubble of self-delusion created from the past to validate the past and thus creating the future from the past which is always only the re-creation of the past –

and so we as humanity are enslaved in patterns of the past re-played in the present creating the future as the past, whereby the forms and shapes and pictures may be changing, but the patterns remain in essence the same, and that is why we are seeing no actual evolution, but only the externalization of our own consciousness as the system we have accepted as 'life', the rules and laws of which we have made to the 'laws of our being' in spite of all the evidence that we are enslaving ourselves and each-other by the very acceptance of these rules as if that was the only to exist and co-exist in this reality.


I commit myself to stopping the fear that keeps me bound to rules of engagement that do not serve life.

I commit myself to making clear to myself and my world that fear is an irrational construct brainwashed into everybody by the system to make sure we serve the system and never change.

I commit myself to utilizing fear as an indication that change is required; utilizing fear as an opportunity to move through the illusion of my self-delusion and do what requires to be done so that life as who I am is set free and all life is set free from the chains of the current system as it exists within and without.

I commit myself to stopping myself from following patterns of self-abuse, self-diminishment, self-regret; and standing-up from the pit of regret in the realization that only I can make that choice within myself, only I can give life to myself, only I can stop that which is unacceptable in the face of life, only I can make myself worthy of life and re-create myself and my world based on principles that honor and support life; so that we may once and for all put an end to the rules of the current system that keep everyone enslaved in fear, denial, suppression and separation.

I commit myself to exposing the rules of this world as the patterns we have accepted and allowed ourselves and our world to be enslaved within, so that I may see and all may see HOW we have been keeping this prison 'alive' while we have been 'dead'; so that I may see and all may see HOW we have been the ones imprisoning ourselves and each-other as our world into infinity patterns of vicious circles causing the exploitation of life and the diminishment of ourselves while we exist in bubbles of consciousness separate from life as a whole and deny our responsibility for ourselves and our world.

I commit myself to investigating the patterns of life-abuse that I and my world exist within, to clearly see what it is that must be stopped for LIFE to prevail as heaven on earth for ALL.

I commit myself to stopping self-suppression and self-segregation in all possible ways, so that I may expand and express and be a living example of life standing-up from the pit of the mind.

I commit myself to investigating and exposing the separation of ourselves from life, through the investigation of my own role within this - so that all may see that we exist, though uniquely, yet collectively trapped within the same patterns of consciousness; and that therefore we are, each-one for oneself and all of us together, able to reform the patterns of our existence into a living-creation that will truly be equal to life and will support all life equally in all possible ways.

I commit myself to stopping all blame I hold within myself, both against myself and against my world, as I clearly see from history that blame is not getting us anywhere, as blame is equal to the abdication of our responsibility and results to whining and diminishing ourselves without ever taking responsibility and being The One to stop, stand-up and change.

I commit myself to Response-Ability, therefore I accept myself as Able to appropriately and effectively Respond to what is here as myself and my world - since I realize that seeing and acknowledging what goes 'wrong' is the first step to stopping it and making things 'right', starting with ourselves.



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 30 Apr 2012, 20:15

Bella's Journey to Life Day 17: Remain Pre-occupied or Occupy the Space you Breathe in

We are so often pre-occupied with a 'problem' instead of realizing that once we see the problem we are actually also able to see the solution – as a problem always entails its solution.

Seeing a 'problem' seems to trigger our perceptual filters of judgment to such an extent, that we often become the problem the more we look at the problem.

That's where the thing starts to cycle, where we go from seeing a problem, judging the problem, judging ourselves, going into self-judgment, self-pity, self-loathing, and within this perpetuating the problem and becoming it even more...
Or we deny the problem, we try to act as if everything is "okay", thinking that if we do not look then there is nothing there, just like sheep that run into a bush when a fire starts, feeling ‘safe’ when they don’t see the fire.

"We didn't start the fire!" Really? Anything we recognize in our world and are able to name, we do so because we can personally relate to it, in one way or another. This in fact implies our responsibility for all problematic situations we are faced with or witness in our world, and it is only common sense to look at how we would resolve and correct a point within ourselves once we acknowledge its existence within our world.

Back to the point of pre-occupation.
I have been asking myself quite often lately how I can be the best I can be in my world. For some reason, I looked at what I can 'do', and it didn't occur to me that it's not about 'what I do', it's about who I am within everything I do.

I was so pre-occupied with feeling inferior within my current position in the world, judging what I do, my job, my lack of money, the fact that I have degrees that don't seem to have enough value in the system; I was so pre-occupied with the 'problem' I was perceiving that I failed to see that it's not about the job I do, the degrees I have, the opportunities that exist or don't exist for me to 'do something of value' - but rather it's about who I am within every moment of my actual reality, regardless where, what, with whom.

So from one perceptual judgment about my 'place in the world' I've created a whole idea about what I'm doing, what I could be doing, what I should be doing - as if that would make 'me' any better, any more worthy, any more meaningful. And I've measured myself based on what I do, what I don't do, what I can't do - instead of realizing that it is who I am within whatever I do that gives meaning to the point and determines whether my presence and participation in my world is of support for life.

I observed a similar point within my relationship. I have lately been realizing the main patterns I've been existing within, however instead of taking one point at a time and taking each point to a solution, a corrective-application, I allowed myself to be pre-occupied in the mind with all of it at the same time, making a mountain out of it and back-chatting about how "bad" I am, what a "horrible person" I've been, “how can anyone love me” and similar thought patterns, as well as focusing on the points that are not yet to my satisfaction.

Within this, I missed everything that is good, everything that is of support, the points that I HAVE been able to change or correct. I failed to see the actuality of my reality because I had placed in front of it a mountain of shit.

So it's easy to see that being pre-occupied with something is when we make 'more' out of a point than what it is. Being pre-occupied occurs when we are fixated on 'the problem' within our mind, and even though we may believe we are 'working on it', we are in fact only mentally turning it around without any actual effective direction in the physical.

That's where writing is such an excellent tool, because in the physical it's difficult to fool ourselves when we can see right in front of us, black on white, what we are doing, step by step. In the mind it’s easy to 'forget' - and we fail to see how many times we actually repeat a point or how many times we make the same ‘commitments’ mentally without any actual change.

‘Forgive and forget’ is a saying that applies here, because really, that which we forgive we must also be willing to immediately let go. That is the point of forgiveness. No more debt, no attachments, no left-overs. It’s a clean slate, and therefore immediate directive solution-determination is required to 'fill the gap': that which we de-program requires to be re-programmed in self-honesty, with a new script, a new pathway to walk and apply as resolution, as solution, as actual evolution.

So, whenever I find myself pre-occupied in the mind, I can be certain that the point I'm looking at has not yet been effectively resolved and directed, or I have not yet effectively willed myself to let it go.

It's quite fascinating to see the nature of self-consciousness as what we have become: it desperately tries to hold-on to anything that it's used to identifying with, and it really has difficulties letting go of that which it 'knows' as the definitions of itself, regardless whether 'positive' or 'negative'.

So the question we are all faced with is:

Will we be equal to and one with the box of self-consciousness we've become and remain limited to its habitual patterns, remain limited to only the 'known' and accepted definitions of ourselves and our world?
Or will we stand equal to and one with Life as all that is here and therefore stand-up for life to no longer accept limitation and abuse, to no longer accept life as ourselves and each-other to be enslaved to preprogrammed patterns and definitions that result into the exploitation and discrimination of life in this existence!


I commit myself to training myself to take directive action in every moment, to no longer blindly follow the preprogrammed nature of my self-consciousness in its limited and restrictive patterns of thoughts and reactions.

I commit myself to training myself to walk in real-time breath by breath, stopping pre-occupation in the mind and instead applying direct and directive resolution-methods to any point that comes to my awareness, so that the result is directed and resolved in the physical where it can be tested and measured - the physical as the actual reality we all share and have an impact on, and not the mental.

I commit myself to stop wasting my breaths to the mind where things are turned around and filtered through the laws of one's self-consciousness, and instead: to direct things in the physical through practical common sense, direct communication, writing, self-corrective application - making sure that I invest wisely the time that is given to me on Earth and is measured with every breath I take.

I commit myself to stop my pre-occupation with 'the problems' and instead to focus on living-solutions that can be applied by all and anyone in this journey to life as freedom and dignity for all.


How much time do we waste on the mind, how much time do we waste 'thinking' the same things over and over again, trapping ourselves into pre-occupation without any actual directive solution or change?
How many breaths do we waste looking at a problem, while we even make it bigger and bigger the more attention we give it?

Is it coincidence that 'distraction' and 'destruction' sounds the same?

While we are pre-occupied in the mind, we cannot occupy the space we breathe in.

It's important to use the mind wisely and constructively, in self-honesty and practical common sense.
That is the way to be and become the directive principle within/as self - otherwise what we tend to do is surrender ourselves to the mind and let it 'guide us' like an auto-pilot. All the while, the 'routes' and 'simulations' the mind is set to follow: were not programmed-in by ourselves in self-awareness. They were programmed-in by the impulses we received through our environment which is subject to the world-system and the accepted 'ways of the world'. And so we transmit what we receive - input equals output - and end up re-creating the same system we are all enslaved to, in the inner as in the outer.

So the choice we have - each one individually and collectively as humanity - is clear:
We either continue acting out the preprogrammed 'simulations' and follow the 'routes' that were paved by those who have gone before us and resulted to the world as we know it; OR we stand-up in self-honesty and use practical common sense to re-form our existence, both in the inner and in the outer, into equality and oneness of life as actual life-support systems in all possible ways of our existence.

To do that, we must OCCUPY THE SPACE WE BREATHE IN in every moment; we must be HERE in full self-awareness; we must question our own acceptances and allowances, question the definitions we subscribe to about ourselves and our world; investigate the patterns we participate in and the outflows thereof; and educate ourselves to be able to make informed decisions and actual choices in life that are rooted in self-realization as life, not in the fear-based and limited patterns that our conditioned consciousness is wired to exist as.

The choice is: to either remain in limitation, separation, enslavement, while we allow things to 'flow' in their preprogrammed pathways OR to break free and expand, transcend our separation with everything that is here, realizing we are an equal part of the whole and as such we have an impact on the whole and a responsibility for the whole – and therefore by making directive choices and living life-support solutions into creation: we are in fact able to 'stop the train', stop history which has been a story of ‘divide and conquer’, and write OUR story as Earthlings, to re-from and re-direct this existence into something that is truly worthy of being called LIFE.


I commit myself to exposing the nature of ourselves and what we have become as this world through the relationships we entertain, so that we may all see the opportunity of changing and transforming our 'ways of living' in our relationships on the smaller scale, in the realization that who we are and how we participate in the small is what creates the 'bigger picture' that is currently enslaving all and everything.

I commit myself to exposing the nature of preprogramming that we are all individually and collectively subject to (this nature to which we are inferior yet attempt to act superior to) and sharing the practical steps of standing equal to and one with this existence as ourselves: which is to self-realize the current consciousness to see what we have been creating through the accepted mechanisms of the mind system; to stop the self-dishonesty, stop the fear, stop the inner wars and the accepted division within self and get to a point of self-equality and oneness through self-honesty and self-forgiveness; and from the understanding of the role we each play within the whole to stand-up and make the choice of who we are going to be, which is equal to and one with what this existence is going to be.

I commit myself to bringing forth awareness of LIFE in all possible ways by investigating and exposing where and how we limit, separate, abuse ourselves; so that we may stop the accepted ways of limitation, separation and abuse and find practical ways to live that which will support all life equally to expand and express, so that each living thing may blossom to its utmost potential.

I commit myself to bringing into humanity’s awareness our interconnectedness and interdependence as life, so that all may see and realize that no man is an island and that what we do to each-other we do to ourselves, and what we do to ourselves we do to our world. Therefore we are all equally responsible for what is here, and changing what is here to be what's best for all will be what is best for each one individually as well.



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 01 May 2012, 15:03

Bella's Journey to Life Day 18: Special Love in Special Relationships with Special People

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to discriminate people in my world based on value-judgments of ‘specialness’, wherein I would label some people as ‘special’ and others as ‘less special’ and from that starting-point I would approach and treat people accordingly – instead of realizing that such behaviour is equal to the application of discrimination in the world system, where people are categorized based on value-judgments according to what the system can profit from them; and within this I did not realize that I’ve been existing equal to the system as self-interest, wherein I have judged people consciously or unconsciously based on how they can support my self-interest.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to approach and treat all life equally.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that we see people through the filters of our consciousness based on past experiences, and within this we label and categorize people at first sight according to how we can relate the picture we see to past experiences, using the database of the mind consciousness to pre-conceive ‘who’ another is and from there to place another into a box of ‘special’ or ‘less special’.

Within this I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that we do not actually really intimately get to know and communicate with people as who they are, but we only communicate within the preconceived limitations of our own mind consciousness, in essence only talking to ourselves and seeing only ourselves, not ever really seeing a being in its uniqueness and realizing who they really are.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that we seek ‘special’ people and ‘special’ relationships out of the desire to be seen as and feel ‘special’ to enhance our ‘value’ in our own eyes and the eyes of the world – when in fact within this we are tacitly implying that we are ‘less than’ and ‘lacking’ in value, we are not accepting ourselves as life, as equals in the value of life, but have some inherent form of accepted ‘inferiority’ that drives us to seek ‘value’ outside of ourselves based on mental concepts of this world consciousness.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to see and perceive some people as ‘special’ and others as ‘less special’ – instead of realizing that everyone is the product of the environment they were born-into and conditioned through, and therefore any ‘specialness’ in this existence or ‘lack’ thereof is in fact the result of preprogramming and is only reflecting the conditioned predetermination of the observer.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to see and perceive some people as ‘special’ and others as ‘less special’ – instead of realizing that by allowing such judgments towards others, I am giving permission for such judgments to be done unto me as well, and within this I am allowing myself to be subject to and define myself through such judgments of ‘specialness’ or ‘lack’ thereof.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see and realize that ‘specialness’ in this world is a point used to manipulate, based on the reward- & punishment-system we use to ‘educate’ our children and call it ‘love’.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed a world where we place ‘specialness’ in that which will support the profit of ‘the one’ – ‘the one’ being either an individual or the world/money-system; since in fact, as a system, the individual and the money-system are equal: whereby everything is always used and abused to serve self-interest and the profit of ‘the one’ only.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see and realize that we have become systems in the image and likeness of this world consciousness manifested within and as the current money-system.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to investigate how the points and applications that I see as unacceptable in this world in fact exist within and as me, equally as within everyone, through how we participate in our everyday reality, what we think, how we think, why we do what we do.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see that my motivation, my drive in life has been equal to and one with that which motivates and drives the world-system: which is ‘value’ defined as money in the world-system and as self-interest in the mind-system as self-consciousness – both based on the profit of ‘the one’.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see and realize that by creating and/or accepting value-judgments of ‘specialness’ about anything in my world, I am in fact disregarding the value of life which is equal in all.

I commit myself to realizing and accepting myself as life and therefore as equal in life.

I commit myself to bringing forth awareness of life as oneness and equality.

I commit myself to exposing the ‘special’ groupings of this world and the separatism they promote.

I commit myself to stopping separatism within myself and letting go of the inherent judgmental nature of myself as consciousness – so that I may lift the veils of consciousness and start seeing things for what they really are in this world, as cause and effect and the consequences of our existence in all possible ways.

I commit myself to bringing forth awareness about how we exist in fear and submit to fear, from the starting-point of which we become our own slaves and attempt to create illusions like special values and exclusive groupings to feel ‘safe’, feel ‘well positioned’, feel ‘taken care of’; while we allow half the world to exist in suffering and atrocious conditions that lack even the bare minimum of what a being requires to survive in this reality, in spite of the evidence that we are the only ones that are in a position to make a difference in this world, yet we allow fear to be the directive principle that determines our decisions and our way of life, resulting to an existence where everyone is busy ‘protecting’ their ‘own’, despite of the obvious common sense that nothing is owned and nothing of what we ‘possess’ remains at death.

I commit myself to training myself in practical oneness and equality in all aspects of my life, so that I may be and become a living example of the teachings of Jesus, bringing forth a system that will allow everyone equally to pursue self-empowerment as life.

I commit myself to letting go of any ideas of ‘specialness’ and all mental concepts that divide life, so that I may embrace life and accept myself as life, and from this starting-point live and apply only that which in fact supports life in all possible ways.

I commit myself to being and becoming a living example of practical equality and oneness, transforming my relationships from separation, manipulation and fear into freedom, equality and oneness; so that we may realize that actual freedom is only possible when all are equally free in the realization that life exists as interconnectedness and interdependence and therefore it is ludicrous to defend mental concepts of separatism, when all physical evidence is clearly showing us how all abuse we inflict on our world, we equally inflict onto ourselves.

Therefore I commit myself to doing and living only that which I would like to be done unto me, so that we may realize that it is possible to love our neighbour as ourself, bringing forth actual love and caring within the practicality of our co-existence, instead of creating mental concepts of ‘love’ that only promote fear, separation and the ‘specialness’ of ‘our own’.

I commit myself to stopping all self-delusion, as all self-delusion is based on the fear of facing ourselves and all that is here.

I commit myself to facing myself in self-honesty, so that I may see, realize and understand how my existence has thus far been supporting fear and separation as the system within and without – so that I may give myself the chance and the choice to stop, forgive, change and walk as a living example of what is possible once we let go of fear and accept ourselves as equals of life.



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 03 May 2012, 01:00

Bella's Journey to Life Day 19: Fear needs God; God needs Fear

In this system, where Fear needs God and God needs Fear, both fear and god are trapped in a relationship of dependency where 'value' is defined through polarity in such a way, that abuse is allowed as the only way to sustain both Fear and God through infinite cycles of power-games;
power-games being the fuel that creates the friction that keeps the system going. This polarity friction that can be seen manifested both in the money-system as the world and the mind-system as the individual.

Friction generates cycles of energy ad infinitum, manifested within the individual as the thoughts and bipolar reactions as fears and desires of the mind-system; and within the world as the bipolar money-system of rich and poor.

Power-games is the basic energetic state of existence - within as without.

Religion has used both God/Heaven and Fear/Hell to its own benefit.

Religion is a consciousness system that has institutionalized itself to such an extent that it managed to benefit from both points: the mind-system /the individual and the money-system /the world - and has within this become one of the most powerful systems in this reality.

Religion has (just like all world systems: education, media, science, technology) used the money-system for profit/self-interest to maintain control over the 'poor souls' of the human, promising salvation and eternal life in some 'afterlife' while doing nothing to empower the human in this life for real in a way that all souls are supported and able to live without fear.



The money-system system functions just like a religion:

Religion has used fear to promote slavery to a god in the hope for salvation just like the world-system uses fear to promote the purpose of serving the system in order to survive.
It is a pyramid scheme.

Within Religion one fights other belief-systems for the survival of the ‘one true god’. Within the world-system one fights against each-other for the ‘survival of the fittest’.

Both Religion and the money-system utilize concepts of ‘sin’/’debt’ and ‘forgiveness’ linked to a 'higher power': 'god' / 'money').
A ‘higher power’ that is given the authority through belief to decide the fate of the individual, while the individual abdicates his/her responsibility to a 'higher power' - be it god, money, status, technology; it doesn't matter, as long as that 'higher power' is seen as and believed to be the 'savior' of the human, the human remains a slave.

Within Religion, dependency is created through the inner friction of fear of death/fear of loss and the desire for ‘eternal life’/’salvation’.
Within the world-system dependency is created through the friction of fear of survival/fear of loss and the desires of self-interest: the desire for a ‘better life’/‘safety’.

What is fascinating is to observe that the money-system has taken on the nature of fear as hell on earth; while the mind-system takes on the nature of god, where one utilize beliefs through which to project heaven/salvation to feel better while distracting oneself in denial of the actuality of reality.



Both Religion and the world money-system promote through belief an allegedly 'higher purpose' manifested as the hierarchies of both systems, the stairways of which the human is brainwashed to seek to ascend as if that were the actual value of life.

We can see that the current money-system as the world is in fact in its nature a religion; a religion that promotes consumerism, greed (the nastier side of fear) and delusion through belief, while it sells an illusion of 'free choice', since in actuality choice in this system is always determined by the power/money the individual is able to mine.

And the human that is born of this system and brainwashed by the system buys into the 'free choice' presented to it, because this 'free choice' gives the human the 'opportunity' to create its own self-religion as world-view and beliefs – which gives the individual a means to 'justify' his/her existence and lifestyle and why one never question what one serves while one follows fake values like 'money', 'god', 'power' – all of which are based in fear, wherefrom emerge separation, competition, deception, manipulation, abuse; wherefrom emerge an existence where we consume ourselves and each-other trapped in a feverish race for survival: the human race.


I commit myself to exposing the nature of religion for what it is: a belief system through which to keep the human enslaved to concepts and hopes of a 'higher power' that will forgive one's sin/debt and will take one to 'salvation' and 'eternal' life without the individual getting to 'know thyself' or taking responsibility for its existence and the existence of the group that is humanity here on earth, because apparently "god knows you" and "god will save you" and so the human abdicates its responsibility to an invisible 'god' just like we abdicate our responsibility to an invisible pyramid of a system to which we subscribe the power and the authority to manage our relationships, to determine our choices, to guide our will, to fulfil our desires.

I commit myself to exposing Religion for what it is: just another consumerism product that sells promises of 'salvation' through the 'forgiveness of God' without ever allowing the individual to acknowledge the power to forgive themselves and stand equal as life, because 'god' is placed 'more than' life;
and so the individual is not allowed to empower themselves but 'through god', which exists only in the mental, and so we have an existence of individuals with mental disorders unable to stand in integrity and self-trust and empower themselves through knowledge and understanding of the actual physical laws of this existence such as cause and effect as the outflows of our actions which are always a reflection of who we are.
And instead of supporting the human to see and understand that who we are manifests the world as we know it and that it is thus up to us to change our existence into an existence that supports life, Religion will demonize the world and the individual through a concept of 'sin' and will have the individual in fear through ideas of reward and punishment through a 'higher power' which one must worship and serve in order to receive the award at the end of the race as the promise of 'eternal life' and abundance in the 'afterlife'.

And so Religion has the individual focused on the 'afterlife' and distracted within mental concepts of a 'promised land' for a select few that are somehow 'special' in the eyes of god (not to mention the absurdity of different gods having different groups of people as their special 'chosen ones' and putting up wars against the 'chosen ones' of other gods!!!);
Religion has the individual trapped within this distraction in the mind, focused on projected fear-based ideas of 'grandeur' in some 'afterlife', and so the individual is divided within itself and unable to effective participate HERE in this reality we all share to make it into an existence that supports all life equally and leaves no space for fear, abuse, separation, war.

I commit myself to standing up and exposing all beliefs for what they are: concepts created to divide and conquer both the individual and the world.

I commit myself to standing for life and supporting my world to stand-up from fear and empower themselves to take self-responsibility as life and stand as one group - the one group that really matters: Humanity as life, all as equals in one world.

I commit myself to supporting my world to realize that we as humanity require to stand-up from fear, break the chains of enslavement as imposed through the current money-system of consumerism and exploitation, and bring forth a new system of actual life-support for all.

I commit myself to exposing all fake values to which we as humanity buy into and submerge ourselves to - so that we may all recognize the value of life as the actual value that is currently being exploited and abused in the name of fake values and profit.

I commit myself to in all possible ways honor and support life as the actual value that matters, so that I may be a living example for others to reconsider what they place value into and whether it is really worth abdicating our directive-power as life here on earth for some promised 'power'/'reward'/'salvation' in some 'afterlife'.

I commit myself to exposing the deception of Religion demonizing the world as if it's not us the people that create the world in the image and likeness of ourselves.

I commit myself to exposing the deception of Religion promising ‘salvation’ from this world and not allowing the people to realize that a 'salvation' that is 'given' through a 'higher power' in fact equals enslavement, because real actual salvation can only emerge through self transcending fear ad breaking free from the chains of the inner and outer systems; can only emerge through the self-will of a human that knows oneself and realizes its role within the whole as cause and effect and thus takes responsibility for its creation, by directing itself to live and co-exist in ways that will bring forth actual freedom for all and a fear-free society based in mutual recognition as life in self-dignity.



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 03 May 2012, 22:35

Bella's Journey to Life Day 20: No gods, no masters, no slaves

For context read my blog Fear needs God; God needs Fear.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to create the belief of a ‘higher power’ that will ‘save’ me or ‘relieve’ me from the struggles or the sin of this world – instead of realizing that sin or struggle is what we humans are manifesting through our acceptance of a system of inequality, where we sin against life in the name of ‘love’ or ‘profit’ or ‘survival’ and trap ourselves in an infinite struggle to be ‘fit’ for the world system, while we could – in that realization – stand up for life and do what it takes to bring forth a system of actual life support for all, a system that will regard all living beings as equals of life and will leave no room for abuse, deception, manipulation or the creation of beliefs that divide and conquer mankind.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that we are creating beliefs and projections of a ‘higher power’ so that we can hide behind it, so that we don’t have to face ourselves and our creation, so that we don’t have to take responsibility for what is here, but abdicate ourselves and our responsibility to a god or a system that promises ‘ascension’ into some greater power, while we leave half the world to suffer in pain, starvation, famine, war.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that religion is based in hierarchies of power and can therefore be no system that supports all life equally.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that we follow religion based in fear, and that from this starting-point of fear we create beliefs of something ‘more than’ us, something that we wish will save us from ourselves and from our fear – instead of realizing that fear is a creation of systems to divide and conquer and thus control mankind through brainwashing called ‘education’ and ‘love’, while love and education in this world is not based on the principles of life as oneness and equality, they are not inclusive, they are exclusive, and designed to create submissive slaves that will grow up to serve the systems and the ways of the world as we know it.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that as long as we allow fear to be our driving force, we will remain trapped in survival and will continue manifesting a system that enslaves us into a way of life where no one is really free to express, expand and educate themselves, as all medias of the current system are designed to promote the values of capitalism, consumerism, competition, and thus separation.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that life is not belief and life does not require belief to exist, and that common sense and rational, deductive thinking processes should be enough for us to get to know our reality and the laws of nature and organize ourselves in a way that life is best served, the resources that are here for all are distributed based on the actual demand and requirements of all people, the infrastructure is managed in an efficient and sustainable way that respects nature and our environment, and no being needs to suffer or struggle to survive.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that in the thousands of years of the history of religion and civilization, no religion has ever come up with an actual, viable solution for this world, rather, religion has always led people to focus on some afterlife and pray for their self-interest, and thus people are disempowered and degraded to submissive pawns that merely keep the system running while maintaining the illusion of gods and goddesses or some form of ‘higher power’ that will somewhere somehow someday ‘save’ them.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that, just like the money-system utilizes the concept of ‘scarcity’ of money and creates fear of survival and the desire for a higher status in the world, religion utilizes the concept of ‘sin’ and creates fear of judgment day and the desire for salvation for the ‘special servants of god’ that will ‘ascend’ in the ‘afterlife’ – and so both the money-system and the religion-system are making empty promises while forcing the people to be servants and slaves in order to attain those promises made.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to realize that ‘salvation’ through a ‘higher power’ implies that one will then be slave to that ‘higher power’, because if we give something or someone the power and the authority to determine and manifest our fate, then we are abdicating our own power as life, abdicating our directive and our responsibility, and place our fate in the hands of invisible entities created through belief – instead of standing up for ourselves as life and considering what the god or the creator of this existence, given there exists one, would actually want us to do here. Did god not create in his image and likeness? Why are we then abdicating our responsibility as creators of this world, this system, this reality, and focus on some ‘afterlife’ instead of sorting out what is here as our creation?

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that if we as humanity, as mankind, would take the responsibility to sort out our Here and create a home for all, then we would not require concepts of god or a ‘higher power’ to ‘save’ us – ultimately we would not even require a system to manage us because we would be managing ourselves, each one contributing what they are best at according to skills, talents, preferences, and all would have a purpose and a place on earth, and all would be equally worthy in the eyes of god, as we would be bringing forth a world where children are welcome and every single child that is born into this world is able to live without fear and find its place in the world based on its beingness, its talents and abilities.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed a world that is divided through belief, where we exist in separate bubbles of the mental while we disregard this physical reality we all share.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to take life for granted and take this system for granted as if there were no other way to live and co-exist.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to take the earth and this physical reality for granted while indulging in delusions of the mind, separating myself from this one reality we all share, just so that I can ‘justify’ why I exist the way I do and why I am not doing everything in my power and my sphere of influence to heal this one reality we all share, so that all may have a place they can call home and live without fear.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the systems of this world, including religion, thrive on the fear we hold of each-other, the fear we hold of the system itself as we accept ourselves as inferior to the system, the fear we hold of standing up for life – because that is connected with ‘going against the odds’ and being a minority while the majority is following and accepting the system out of fear of survival; yet I should be able to see in common sense that unless I stop the fear within myself and stand up for life, unless even a few people start stopping the fear and standing up for life, we will all be infinitely waiting for others to stand up first, for others to prove to us that we can live without fear, or for a ‘savior’ to ‘save’ us from ourselves and our fear.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand – in spite of the obvious common sense – that fear is a creation of this world used to manipulate and direct the masses so that a select few – be it in politics, in religion, in science – may continue to exploit and abuse life for profit, while they have the masses brainwashed through beliefs and theories about the world, about life, about the human being, yet in fact not allowing the human being to get to know oneself, to get to know one’s world and how this reality functions, because then the human being would be empowered to make a difference, to bring forth changes, and that is a threat to all those that are currently in power, be it in politics, in religion, or any point as the top of the pyramid of a system in this world where the money flows and decisions are made.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed my decisions to be met by systems of this world, when it is clear that the systems of this world are based on profit and do not have the best of life in their vision, but only the best of self-interest and profit.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that even those that are currently on the top of the pyramid of the world system making the top profit and managing the top decisions for mankind: also exist in fear, fear of loss of losing it all, and therefore any individual or group that starts standing up for life and educating self and each-other in practical common sense will be attacked and demonized from all angles, because we dare to question the status quo and threaten the ‘world order’. When it is in fact clear that nothing is in order, the new world order is an ancient bloodline timeline that equally exist in fear of losing their power if the world was to be placed in order through principles of equality and oneness in support of all life equally.

I commit myself to investigating my fears and realizing what systems, beliefs and concepts I submerge myself to from a starting-point of fear – so that I may unfold the common sense required to stop the irrationality of fear within myself and give myself back the power I’ve been abdicating to fear, so that I may make a difference in this world towards an existence without fear, an existence of actual freedom for all, an existence where life is the highest value practically lived and applied through systems of equality, self-empowerment, and cooperation;

so that all may see that we require neither beliefs, nor faith and hope, nor forgiveness, nor a ‘higher power’ to live effectively to our utmost potential; We only require ourselves, all of ourselves Here, in the physical reality. We can forgive ourselves the design we have accepted ourselves to exist within and us, which has been a design of polarity enslavement, and start working with practical common sense and rational education based on principles that support ourselves as life and place life as the highest value that is equal in all.



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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 04 May 2012, 22:47

Bella's Journey to Life Day 21: The Rotten Fruit of Evil is Rooted in Fear

Last night I was reading the newest blog posts on the Rotten Child Syndrome* and the picture of the Apple came up in my mind - the Apple that corrupted Adam and Eve and symbolized the end of Paradise and the beginning of Hell on Earth.

What is peculiar within that story, is that even though it is a snake that offers the 'rotten apple' to the human, it is in fact the knowledge of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ as a mental concept that is symbolized through the apple as the ‘temptation’ that is responsible for the downfall of mankind. Yet it is presented as if the snake is evil; the snake’s image as part of nature and the animal kingdom, part of the beasts of the earth, is abused to create the belief that nature/this world is somehow evil - without questioning the source of evil in the first place.

When in fact, if one self-honestly investigates the nature of the mental as a separate alternate reality based in fear and self-interest, one can see that that is in fact what the snake represents: the mind as the mental alternate reality-bubble of the human, wherein the human is following its own temptation. The human as snake, as a mental interpretation of itself, is biting its own tail trapped in self-interest, while it brings forth the destruction and annihilation of life through following the evil nature of self-interest - instead of realizing life as all as one as equal and living in ways that support all life equally as best for all, in the understanding that what is best for all will be best for self, as life is interconnected and interdependent as oneness on earth, and therefore to honor that oneness of life, equality of the value of life in all practical ways should be common sense.

Another interesting question that the story of Adam and Eve opens up is the source of the concepts of 'good' and 'evil'. We act as if 'good' and 'evil' always existed and as if that is the inherent and irreversible nature of things. But why did god create evil? Did god suddenly fear that his creation might become ‘more than’ him – and in the image and likeness of that fear he created the tree of knowledge to deceive man? And if god created evil, where did god create evil from? Was god evil to create evil, since he created all things in his image and likeness? And if god did not create evil but evil was there in the first place ...then who created god and the devil?!?

So there are many points not considered within how we approach the old scriptures, let alone the point of considering that obviously it wasn't god himself that wrote any scriptures, Jesus did not write scriptures, man did. And man is driven by fear: an undeniable fact that we can see not only in the world today, but also in the stories of the bible depicting the reality of a world more than 2000 years ago.

So a fearful man seems to need a god - be it the god of religion, or the god of power through money and wealth and dominion. The fearful man needs some kind of god to 'elevate' him and support his dominion over others, over the earth, over this world. So that begs the question: How come god and religion is not something that supports the equality of life on earth? How come the god of religion does not value all of his creation equally?

This brings me back to the human mind consciousness, which, given that it’s used in self-interest based in fear instead of being used in common sense based in life, reveals the real evil of existence: the secret mental planes of human alternate-reality bubbles, in the separation and seclusion of which man takes the 'freedom' to judge upon others and fear others and create mental values of things as fake gods and idols that only serve one's self-interest created through the mind while disregarding the common interest of life as the physical paradise reality that is possible on earth and would be best for all life.

It is self-evident in this world that we fail to see things for what they are based on rational deductive thinking and an understanding of cause and effect so that we may prevent consequences of abuse, exploitation and enslavement.

So - if we don't see things for what they are, then HOW do we see things?

We see things through perception, the filters of which have been conditioned and designed through consciousness systems of polarity, even though Jesus said "Judge not lest you be judged" - and yet in our fear we create judgments ABOUT things in our mind, and so we do not see things for what they are, but we only always see our own judgments, in polarities of 'positive' and 'negative' according to what will 'justify' our fears and what will 'serve' our self-interest.

So where does this need to judge come from? Did we possibly maybe judge ourselves to begin with? We must have: because if we hadn't judged ourselves as somehow 'inferior' (and thus InFear / in-fear-I-or), if we had accepted ourselves as creator 'in the image and likeness of god' and had taken full responsibility for our creation in all possible ways: the need would not emerge to pose as 'superior' and attempt to take dominion over others, over the earth, over the world.

Only that which is not equal of LIFE has the need to ‘prove itself’ better through imposed ‘superiority’.
Only that which is not equal of LIFE/LIVE is EVIL as the opposite of life, as that which opposes life; as that which, instead of serving life as all as equal as one, serves self-interest only through the pursuit of happiness as profit, dominion and supremacy at the cost of life.

What we can also see within this world is that mankind is not equal to the mind consciousness system it exists within and as. Man does not 'know thyself'. Man exists within accepted ‘inferiority’ and tries to superimpose ‘superiority’ through a system of abuse and exploitation as we see it reign on earth today - not realizing that what one does to others and the whole, one is doing to oneself.
And so consume ourselves and each-other in a constant race for domination, not even realizing how we deceive ourselves and each-other, how we betray life and make ourselves unworthy of life forever more.

So FEAR then must be the real evil. And fascinatingly enough, not only man has fear, also god has fear, otherwise there would be no religions or different gods or ways and methods to threaten man unless he becomes subserviant to an apparently almighty god the savior...!!!

So if FEAR is the real evil, then the question should be asked: Where does fear come from? Where is fear generated? Where does fear exist?

Fear exists in the mental. Each one is able to observe for oneself in self-honesty: what one will judge, one actually fears.

And so instead of eating from and living as the Tree of Life, we have become subjects to and consumers of the Tree of Knowledge – Knowledge in this world being the tool through which to mind-control and exploit life in the name of profit, as we can clearly see in the world as a money-system and within how education, science, media and all subsystems of this world operate.



I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that our education as accepted and allowed in this world is set out to produce system robots that exist in fear, so that the one god – money – and those that worship that god can be served.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that knowledge of this world has always existed in polarities to create friction and conflict and not allow man to ‘know oneself’ because that would be a threat to the control and dominion of the elitist system.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that fear is an irrational creation of the mental that feeds off the physical and keeps man in check so that man does not stand-up for life but remain slave to fear, trapped in self-imprisonments by one’s own acceptance and allowance of fear to be the driving force of man.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that only fear needs god, and god always needs fear, because without fear, there would be no gods, no masters, no slaves.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the value judgments we are educated with do not reflect the actuality of reality, but only the mental concepts of our forefathers based in fear, separation and greed; and therefore judgments is always connected to fear and we are quick to judge what we don’t know or don’t understand (let alone the fact that we have veiled ourselves so badly with knowledge that we only see what we already know) –
And within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to exist within and as judgment based on mental concepts of separation in ‘good’ and ‘evil’, even though Jesus warned us to “judge not lest we be judged”.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the real evil in this existence is fear – fear as the starting-point of judgment, of separation, of all those ‘protection’- and ‘defence’-mechanisms we barricade ourselves behind, to such an extent that we have troubles finding ourselves, seeing ourselves, getting to know ourselves beyond such mechanisms and systems behind which we hide in fear.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that such existence of fear manifest in ‘exclusive’ bubbles of separation as alternate mental realities, where we exist in self-interest mining for our profit and minding only our own, without realizing that any group is as weak as its weakest member, and that therefore if we allow other parts of ourselves as humanity to exist in struggle and suffering, we are not doing ourselves a favour, we only deceive ourselves in thinking and believing we are serving our interest as we have lost our identity as life and only remained as a mental identity based on fake values, while we ignore and disregard the life in ourselves and each-other.



I commit myself to investigating and exposing all mental concepts created from the starting-point of fear and judgment, and how such concepts are used and abused to manipulate reality for self-interest, starting within the family and parenting, creating bloodlines of manipulation and deception patterns rooted in fear.

I commit myself to stopping fear within myself and stopping myself from following fear as my directive-principle, so that I may be/become the directive-principle of myself to practically apply my understanding of how fear works and to demonstrate that the human consciousness has been programmed through the world system based in fear and can be re-programmed through self-will in self-honesty and self-responsibility, and that through this we are able to change the world consciousness into something that will require no fear and will support all life equally.

I commit myself to exposing the trap of polarity as presented within the ‘knowledge’ of this world and to show that we in fact know very little about who we are, how we function, what drives us, how this physical reality functions and on what physical laws it operates.

I commit myself to demonstrating how the ‘knowledge’ of this world is designed to promote and support consumerism while it divide and conquer human beings so that they consume themselves and each-other instead of nurturing ourselves and each-other – thus human beings do not empower themselves to stand for life as all as equals as one, because they follow the tree of knowledge of this world instead of realizing the tree of life through common sense.

I commit myself to exposing how the evil of this world’s ‘exclusive’ groupings, be it religious, or political, or societal – because this application of ‘exclusivity’ goes against the very nature of life which is all inclusive – and if we really want to make a difference in this world and bring about a change that will benefit all life, then we must start including everything and everyone in our considerations and manifest a solution that is all-inclusive.

I commit myself to demonstrating how the real evil is FEAR: as those that try to convert others to ‘their’ religions and ‘their’ belief-systems out of self-righteousness and the fear of being wrong, and those that -in spite of seeing and understanding what is going on- are doing nothing out of fear of losing the support they have in the system; so that we all may see and realize that so much more is possible once we stop giving-in to fear, once we stop being driven by fear as auto-pilot.

I commit myself to bringing forth an existence where no gods, no masters, no slaves are required – an existence where all life is regarded and supported as equals and given equal power, equal access, equal life, based on the fact that the value of life is life.

I commit myself to demonstrating that we have to work together to bring forth a new system that will actually support such principle of ‘no gods, no masters, no slaves’ because that will give everyone the opportunity to re-educate ourselves and walk ourselves out of fear, out of survival and into living as the directive-principle as who we really are as life.

I commit myself to exposing the illusionary and abusive nature of the mental as it exists in the back-chatting of each mind and how we separate ourselves from life through mental values and concepts of separation based in fear; and that fear exist of and as the mind, and has become the very nature of ourselves that eats off of our flesh sucking us dry while we follow the mind as god, as master, and so we are slaves within our very self, existing in accepted self-imprisonment and utilizing beliefs and concepts of saviours to ‘set us free’ without considering that that would imply further enslavement, as actual freedom must be self-realized and self-created through self-honesty as ‘man know thyself’ and self-will as creator as man of god that takes full responsibility for his/her creation that is this One physical reality here that we All share Equally by the very air we breathe, the water we resonate as, the dust we return to.

I commit myself to demonstrating that this world could be Paradise for All if we will it – and to do that we have to stop the ill will of man that is determined by fear and manipulated by the fear-doctrines of a system of profit and consumer-Ism.

I commit myself to exposing all Isms as Schisms that divide men to conquer the world by promoting fear and mental concepts of exclusivity and separation and thus abuse life in the name of profit and domination that some even dare to call 'love'.

I commit myself to training myself in self-will through self-honesty and practical common sense, so that my practical living in every breath may be/become an example and support for my world, demonstrating that change is possible, that we ARE able to take response-ability and respond to What is Here with common sense and rational deductive thinking to bring forth solutions that will measurably have a benefit for all life equally and will transform our Here into Heaven on Earth – a Paradise where All may Equally Live, Express, Expand, Explore and have FUN!




*On the Rotten Child Syndrome read:
Creation's Journey to Life: Dementia - The Rotten Child Syndrome
Creation's Journey to Life: Rotten Love
Creation's Journey to Life: Rotten Souls



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 05 May 2012, 22:31

Bella's Journey to Life Day 22: Stop the Cold War Within to End War Without

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the very nature of how we exist within ourselves and each-other is confirming the game theory of the 'big brothers' that believe human beings cannot be trusted and are always driven by self-interest and will deceive another rather than work together to avoid being deceived.

Therefore I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what this in fact shows is that human nature as we've come to accept and re-create it: is based in fear.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that it is from the starting-point of fear that people deceive others to pursue self-interest, and that self-interest in fact equals fear.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the whole world system with all its subsystems such as media, education, science, money-system, family: are set out to 'prove' that fear is ‘justified’ and thus we can apparently ‘justify’ existing against each-other and interacting only through protection- and defence-mechanisms as personalities, never really getting to know ourselves and each-other; claiming that "human nature cannot be changed", when in fact human nature is a consciousness system that is being imprinted onto a child from the moment it is born into this world - it is a programmed input-output system that determines one's reactions, emotions and thoughts through belief-systems and equations of definitions, based on which the personality/personalities are formed that people become, resulting to the role each one plays within society as a whole.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the world as we know it is the result of who we are within the individual relationships we entertain as well as within the role(s) we take on within society, directly or indirectly - and that to change society we do not require control, or fear, or any of the tactics of ‘cold war’; because it is our accepted nature that creates the world as we know it, and therefore only a change of the consciousness system we exist within as our 'nature' will result into a change of our world - a change brought forth through self-honesty as the understanding of one's 'personality' as the result of conditioned programming and realizing one's role within the whole as the outflows of one's existence within one's relationships and interactions. In other words: only through self-responsibility are we able to 'save ourselves' and 'save the world'.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the consciousness patterns we exist within as 'who we are': are the same patterns that exist throughout the systems of our world and within how the systems of our world interact with each-other to serve self-interest: the system as status quo.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that only through changing/transforming the status quo within: are we able to change/transform the status quo without.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within fear of others, within mistrust and suspicion, and so to interact with others from a starting-point of fear manifesting expressions of deception and manipulation within self-interest, betraying life as oneness and equality out of fear of being betrayed, deceived and manipulated.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the starting-point of thinking and believing that I am able to be betrayed, deceived and manipulated implies that I place myself as 'inferior' to others/my world - and that it is from this starting-point of 'inferiority' that we abdicate ourselves and then attempt to superimpose a 'superiority' against others/our world just to get a feeling of 'equality' -
instead of realizing that such perceived 'equality' is not actual true equality of life as oneness, but only a systematic perception of ‘equality’ based on the polarity of 'superiority'-'inferiority', ‘win’-‘lose’, ‘power’-‘powerlessness’; it is the illusion of ‘stability’ as a point of 'neutral experience' for a moment, it is the illusion of a ‘balance’ which in fact only ‘justifies’ the operational existence of polarity because it is created out of polarity and is thus only supporting polarity further more.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that 'equilibrium' or 'balance' within the current world system is but an illusion created through the momentary diffusion of polarities, yet still needing polarity to exist; and therefore 'balance' or 'equilibrium' within the current system is but a diversion tactic to ‘justify’ the existence of polarities as they exist within love-hate, war-peace, good-bad, dominion-slavery;

Within this I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that in a polarity both points are always equal and equally needed to sustain the construct they represent, while the two apparent 'opposites' are like the two sides of the same coin;
and by looking at 'love' in this world or 'peace' in this world or 'dominion' and 'power' in this world: we can clearly see that such 'love', 'peace' or 'power' are not actual expressions of life, are not sustainable qualities that always benefit all in all possible ways, but are merely constructs based on ill values created by the ill will of man that has denied his true power as creator and instead blamed 'others' for his fall rather than taking self-responsibility.

And not only that, but from that point of self-abdication and separation from life, man has proceeded with generating creations of inequality, of separation, of abuse and exploitation, attempting to redeem himself as 'god' as creator and to prove his dominion on earth, but doing so in separation and self-interest, the result is equal to: separation and self-interest. And so all the advancement and 'progress' man has made in its 'evolution' has only brought forth more separation and more fear, more exploitation and more corruption, and thus more systems of self-interest - while we ignore life as a whole, we disregard life as a living-organism of which we are (at least we could be) equal and one part of.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that it is ourselves we are in essence deceiving by following and accepting the preprogrammed human nature as 'inferiority' (inFeariority) which continuously attempts to create a 'superiority' as a way to 'redeem' itself against the world/others -
instead of realizing who we are really are as life and from that realization placing ourselves in a position to stop fear, stop self-deception, stop the betrayal of life, and finally stand together, stand-up for life, and investigate how human nature is created and what we can do to re-create ourselves in a way that will support ourselves and each-other as life; in a way that will support all life equally, so that we do not have to exist in fear, so that we do not have to participate in our reality through protection- and defence-mechanisms, but rather participate in our world through direct communication and clarity of expression, formulating common goals in common sense for our co-existence on this common ground on Earth with a common interest: LIFE, as who we all really are.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what we call 'cold war' is in fact something that takes place continuously in the hidden chambers of our mind where we think no one is looking and no one is listening, where we are back-chatting about others and scheme our tactics of manipulation to get what we want in self-interest; and that such manipulation will mostly take-on 'beautiful' and 'loving' forms when expressed on the outside, yet it is based in the inside thoughts of fear, suspicion and mistrust that we hide in our secret mind;

and so I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that we are within ourselves in a constant war towards others/our world - and therefore it is no coincidence that what we are faced and confronted with in the outer world is conflict and war and politicians unable to work together, science unable to work on what will support life as they are pursuing only profit in self-interest, and corporations that are busy undermining each-other in the name of power and dominion in the 'free (!) market' of the world.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I have 'free choice' within my secret mind, instead of realizing that 'free choice' that can only exist within the secret mind cannot in fact be free; just like the 'free market' of the world is not free at all - we are simply deceiving ourselves and each-other by defining freedom as 'the freedom to deceive and manipulate others/the world to suit our self-interest'.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the only way to bring forth actual freedom for life is through transparency and self-responsibility - because as long as we need to hide from each-other (ending up hiding from ourselves to not have to face what we have been accepting and allowing), we cannot be free. As long as we have to watch our back from others/our world, we cannot be free. As long as fear exists, as long as fear is allowed to be the driving force of existence: we cannot be free.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that conflict and war emerge from our fear of being dominated and controlled by others/our world; and therefore we will rather be the first to dominate and control others, so that that which we fear won't happen to us - what an irony, what a vicious trap!

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where we define 'power' as domination and control, and have completely lost our power as life, our power as creators, our power as a living-existence;
We have become systems within a system, controlled by the very control we are imposing against each-other, we are like the snake biting its own tail, not wanting to see that what we do to others/our world we are essentially doing to ourselves.



I commit myself to stopping the ‘cold war’ within myself by stopping the friction of polarity within my mind, stopping the judgment in the secret mind and bringing all that is ‘hidden’ to the surface to be faced and dealt with directly and directed/corrected accordingly – realizing that I must take responsibility for everything that exists within me, whether I have created it /placed it there myself or not, because by my very allowance and acceptance and permission for it to exist within and as me: I see I am responsible.

I commit myself to proving to myself and demonstrating that real power is life and emerge within self-equality and oneness, from a starting-point of self-honesty as ‘man know thyself’ – and that all ‘power’ of this world is bound to fall as it is but castles built on sand based on mental concepts and ideas of fear and control while disregarding the actual physical reality of cause and effect that we all share and have – whether in awareness or not – an impact on.

I commit myself to sharing the realization that what we are facing within and without is in fact ourselves – and that no one can get away with what we have accepted and allowed, we cannot escape ourselves, we cannot avoid the consequences of our deception and exploitation because the latest at death, life asks the question: Who are you?

I commit myself to showing that transparency is the only healthy way of co-existence where we don’t have to hide from ourselves, we don’t have to hide from each-other, we don’t have to exist through protection- and defence-mechanisms as personalities – but can finally get to know ourselves and each-other intimately, and learn to trust ourselves and each-other as life.

I commit myself to applying practical oneness and equality as in considering all life equally, realizing that I am equal to and one with what I accept and allow within myself and my world; so that we may all start considering each-other as ourselves and stand-up to stop the fear, the judgment and the separation we’ve been accepting as if there were no other way to live in this existence.

I commit myself to working together with others in my immediate reality to live the realization that we have to learn to work together and consider each-other as equals of life, because if we don’t work together we will only continue on the path of war, conflict and friction and we’ll never be able to resolve the situation on earth – a situation that is causing not only the suffering and harm of mankind but also the exploitation and destruction of our planet, our living-home, our Earth.

I commit myself to supporting myself and my world equally in seeing, realizing and understanding that we are here on Earth facing ourselves, facing our creation; therefore there is no point in looking for or creating alternate realities to hide from the actuality of What is Here, no point in following projections/ideas of an ‘afterlife’ where we will apparently be rewarded – because How can we be anything more in any other reality than who we are with every breath in every here moment; How can we be anything more that what we accumulate as ourselves step by step as we go on ‘living our lives’; How can we be anything more in any other reality if we are not even able to sort out this one reality we are finding ourselves sharing Here!

I commit myself to demonstrating that the best reward for any living being is that which will bring-forth a world where all living beings can be free and live without fear;
because looking in self-honesty at this world as a mirror of ourselves we can see that ‘reward’ has been defined in polarity and separation and self-interest with the result of creating and re-creating WAR: re-war-d –
and even our word has become that, as we keep on creating and re-creating war, and so our living existence has become one of war, within and without.
Therefore to redefine reward in common sense as life we must be willing to see the absurdity of our creation as re-war-d and to see that actual reward as life will only be that which will truly reward /benefit /support all life equally at all times and in all possible ways.

I commit myself to bringing-forth a new system that no longer imposes fear, self-interest and the pursuit of profit in the name of Money as god; a new system that places LIFE as the highest value and therefore gives equally to All;
And to get there, we must see that we have to re-educate ourselves and each-other to stop the accepted ‘human nature’, stop the vicious cycles of our existence, and start investigating practical applications of oneness and equality to support life, to break free from fear, to stop the separation, and make our self-interest equal to the interest of life;
so that we may create heaven on earth as a place where each and every single living-being is at all times equally supported with all that is here – as Earth provides for all equally, and the Sun shines for all equally, and as children of the Earth and the Sun we should at least make sure that what is given unconditionally for all is also distributed and made available to all equally.

Then we will be truly equal of life, equal as life, and worthy of life on this planet.



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 06 May 2012, 15:50

Bella's Journey to Life Day 23: A Fugitive of my Own | Considerations of a Self-Exile in Self-Imprisonment

I've been watching the series The Firm, and I find it activates the point of 'fugitive' running from a threat, having no stable home - it is a restless feeling of being always on the run.

I recently moved to a new place - and as most of the times, it feels like being a guest. Now how do I define 'guest'? It's someone who is under the auspices of the home-owners, someone who does not have equal rights/responsibilities/access but must submit to the instructions of the home-owner and honor the host with a sense of obligation.

Looking at this, I’d say the key words here are: 'equal', 'access', 'owner', ‘obligation’.

It’s as if one has to ‘earn the right’ to be here, and when that ‘right’ is given, one is obliged to the giver. Fascinatingly enough this pattern is how the whole world-system / money-system is constructed to operate, where people have to apparently ‘earn their right’ to be part of the system and when they do, they feel ‘obliged’ to serve the system as a form of being ‘grateful’ that the system is giving them a home, a place in this world.

Furthermore, what I’m seeing within this is an accepted ‘inferiority’ and value being placed within 'access' and 'owner', whereby the owner has direct and unquestionable access to a stable home and therefore a form of ‘power’, which I’ve perceived and defined as 'superior' while I in relation to this define myself as 'inferior' as I do not own a house nor have access to a home as an equal part.

One vital point revealed within this, is how we define ourselves in relation to = in comparison to others/the world, and therefore we define ourselves and our self-worth in relation to a system, which makes us equal to a system. We make of ourselves systems within a system, while we fail to see and accept ourselves as life and equal to the value of life. We measure our self-worth on the systems of this world, which implies that we define our self-worth in separation from ourselves as life.


However – within all this, the key question would be: Who defines whether I am /can be an 'equal part? Who defines me as 'inferior'? Who is making the comparison and draws conclusions as value-judgments towards self and others?
I am.

Why am I doing so? The answer is in the habit - it is in the past that inhabits me. It is older than I am, it is in the history of my mother, my grandparents, my family. It is in the acceptance of powerlessness and inferiority towards the world that comes from the generations before me, which I have accepted and allowed to define ‘who I am’ and how I experience myself.

Born into the first (grandparents) and the second (parents) world war, enduring the terror and the uncertainty of the circumstances, growing up with hopes and dreams yet stigmatized through the secrecy and caution the respective parents had to maintain in order to ensure a certain safety for the family, these people have come to accept a certain fate and form certain judgments about the world and themselves; they’ve come to direct blame towards certain things and idolize other things, which is what creates the polarity friction that generates the energy with which to form an attitude towards life and patterns of behaviour that make-up the personality-suit of a being, as the ‘suit’ it wears to suit the conditions of this existence and have a place in this world.

I myself was also born during a war. It was in the summer of 1974 in Cyprus, during a reign of terror and under such confusing circumstances that you didn't know who to trust. Everything happened so fast and people had to leave their homes and run for their lives while bombs fell from the sky, and that is what my parents were busy doing just before I was born. We were fugitives, and we were lucky I suppose that our family was not met with any incidents of torture or rape, nor did we have to report any missing persons like many other families did after the war. My family left their home, lost their house and belongings and had to start over in a new city after the land was divided and it was clear that there is no possibility of returning any time soon. That was 38 years ago.

The safe womb of my mother must have felt not very comfortable while she was in agony for her life and mine, while we were running from the war troops, not knowing whether the next bomb would hit us and signify our end.

It must have been loud, it must have been terrifying, but obviously I have no conscious memories of the time. Only the resonance of an unsettling feeling of being on the run, of never getting home, never settling in and knowing you belong, realizing you don't own anything as everything can be taken away from you at any given moment.

The newly situated family struggled but made it, managed to make a new start and find jobs and work for a rent. My grandmother was politically active and had taken on a responsible position in the fugitive committee of the state, as there was a time where the runaways had to stay in refugee camps until the government was able to accommodate them in specifically prepared parts of the country. We stayed on a refugee camp for a while too, so I guess my grandmother was wanting to help support the refugees out of first-hand experience of what it means to exist in uncertainty, having lost everything, with no support coming from any side that would promise a bright future for the families - mostly children and women, as most men were caught up within the military and political circumstances of the time.


A couple of years ago I found myself out in the streets of Berlin on a new year's eve and it took less than ten minutes for me to decide I don't want to be on the streets - fireworks and party-bombs banging and popping everywhere, the loud noise of which scared the hell out of me and placed me in an experience of threatening danger, so much so that I immediately knew I would not be able to enjoy the night outside, as I was in that moment finding myself in a complete different reality – a resonant deja-vu of a memory I was not even consciously aware of: War.

It is 'fascinating' and sometimes even disheartening for me to see and realize to what extent my perceptual reality and reactions match those of my mother - at least from what I know of her and how I've experienced her throughout my life.

This makes me consider that we should really work on making a difference in this world in terms of stopping history, because history keeps repeating as patterns of consciousness passed on from generation to generation mostly as unconscious resonant imprints, and it is not seldom that fear and hatred and conflict emerge from the unconscious as something that is 'there', something that 'must be right because I feel it in me', without the children having any possibility to relate to what they're experiencing and place it into context so as to make informed decisions and get to a clean slate.

I didn't know why I always had an aversion towards loud places or crowds of people, or why I seemed to fear people altogether, or why I always felt like being on the run and never able to settle and simply ‘be here’, as if I was damned to have no place in the world to call ‘home’. Obviously as without so within: I felt within myself as if I didn’t have the right to exist, I wasn’t accepting myself as ‘being here’, and have instead looked for that acceptance, permission or validation from others.
And as far back as I can remember, that’s how I felt. I've never known it any other way, I've been that since I can remember, it's been 'me'.

I am not saying that is all there is to it. Surely the integration of such 'experience' as 'who I am' and 'who the world is' did require my involvement as well (and that is where the point of self-responsibility comes in), wherein I would have accepted certain circumstances and situations as 'the way things are', where I did not question my reality or my experience, but made conclusions about myself and my world based on the impulses that were already there to in-form me. And so I was becoming a product of my environment, in-formed by my environment about 'who I am' and what 'the world is'. And even though deep inside I knew that something isn’t right, something is seriously wrong, this cannot be it, there must be another way - I found myself fitting in and adjusting to the ways of the world I was faced with, just like any child will do, even if that is done through rebellion or isolation or withdrawal. We find ways to 'cope' in this world, but seldom do we have find ways to LIVE.

What I am saying is that: there is so much we take for granted, there is so much we do not consider about how we came to be who we are, what acceptances and allowances brought us to the currently accepted self-definitions and judgments, how we directly or indirectly validated the resonant experience of ourselves and formed ourselves to be who and what we are today.

And often, when such considerations are made, we tend to blame our forefathers or the world or the system or something out there, and end-up bitter and hard towards life and ultimately towards ourselves. We seldom investigate such points from the starting-point of investigating and understanding ourselves as creators so as to empower ourselves to free ourselves from the chains of the past and be the ones to stop history from repeating, not only for ourselves but for all life, for all children to come.


Now - asking myself 'why' I was born into such an experience with the consequences I am facing within and as myself today, then clearly what I am finding as a 'lesson' for myself is that I have to learn to accept myself, and I must be the one to give myself the 'right' to live, give myself the permission to be here and occupy the space I breathe in, give myself a home as myself as I am here, and stop running - there is nowhere to go, but simply to accept myself Here;
realizing that Here is where I have the directive-power to understand, determine and direct as myself what was and what will be, and what will be is either the repetition of the past or the healing of the past through self forgiveness, to from here create a future in self-dignity, a world where all living beings have equal rights, equal access, equal power, equal opportunities in life - where we don't have to 'earn the right' to be here, we don't have to 'earn' a place in the world, but manage our world as a oneness of equals in a way that it welcomes and supports all living beings equally, as an actual Home should.



I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define myself through the resonant experience I came to be faced with as product of this world - not realizing that that is who I am as a product of my environment, but it doesn't have to be who I am forever; that it is not who I am as life, but only who I am as part of a system.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to take responsibility for who I am as part of a system - to investigate how I came to be and experience myself the way I 'know' it, so that I may see and acknowledge where and how I gave direct or indirect permission to be defined as and identify with such experience; realize what acceptances and allowances resulted in me being/becoming what I am today and how I feel about myself and the world; and understand that such experience is the manifested consequence of what I have accepted and allowed of the system and thus it is who I have become as part of the system – and that therefore if I want to change the system I have to take responsibility for the part of the system that I've become to begin with.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to blame my world and others for my experience of myself. I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize I have to investigate the patterns that result to my experience, the equations that result to the accepted definitions I’ve come to adopt or create about myself and my world; and to realize that in the end I have in fact created my own experience through my own acceptance and allowance and the fact that I did not consider taking full responsibility for myself and the experience of myself in this world.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to victimize myself in this world, without realizing that I was within this implying and accepting inferiority and powerlessness of myself towards the world, towards the system - and that one is not able to change any point unless one stand equal to and one with it, as it.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and change 'who I am' in separation from myself, instead of first accepting and acknowledging the truth of me as what I have become of the system as a system, to from that starting-point of self-equality and oneness stand-up in self-responsibility and change what I see I can change through actualized self-application in real-time as I participate in my physical reality.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that we've been fighting against ourselves, we've been existing in inner conflict and the denial of ourselves for so long - and that it is only through stopping the denial, stopping the conflict, stopping the judgment and separation: that we are able to embrace ourselves as we are here to begin with, to acknowledge what it is we have become equal to and one with as systems within a system, what aspects of history repeating we are representing within our existence: to from within that understanding stand-up and change ourselves equal and one, by placing knowledge and understanding into practical application and becoming the solution we want to see in our world.


I commit myself to investigating, acknowledging and accepting as me all points I dis-cover within myself no matter how ugly or uncomfortable they might be;
and from here I commit myself to stop all judgment, denial and separation within myself, and to instead stand equal to and one with any given point I dis-cover within myself/my participation in my world that is representing a point of dis-comfort and dis-ease as: to from this starting-point of self-acceptance in self-equality and oneness - stand-up and transform that which I see is not supporting me as life, that which I see is only keeping history repeating and me trapped in patterns of unworthiness and misery; into practical living applications that place me equal to who I really am as life and one with the support of all life as the change I want to see in my world.

I commit myself to stopping myself from seeing myself through the eyes of the past, through the eyes of my accepted, adopted and created self-definitions as formed through the limited fuzzy logic of my self-consciousness which is a replica of this world consciousness that is keeping history repeating and manifesting the world as we know it.

I commit myself to stopping myself from seeing myself as a limited and defined system which can be nothing else or which is even damned to exist like that forever; and gifting myself the gift of life, making a definitive and determined decision about who I will be as life and about what I will accept and allow as life and what not.

I commit myself to opening myself up to myself as life so that I may be my own self-support, accepting myself here, giving myself the permission to be here as an equal, and willing myself to stop the accepted limitations and patterns/definitions/play-outs of the past, so that I may live and expand to my utmost potential and within that: bring-forth a world where each and every single being have the freedom to live to their utmost potential.

I commit myself to a new form of parenting where we don’t simply imprint our children with our knowledge and information expecting them to ‘make it’ in this world through power-games, competition and struggle for survival – but instead to reveal to our children what we have learned from the past, the mistakes we made, what we’ve understood about how this reality operates and how we create ourselves and this world through our acceptances and allowances, denial and ignorance; so that we may give ourselves and our children the possibility to make a difference, to stop history from repeating, and to not feel obliged to simply accept what is presented to them in this world as if it were the only way.

I commit myself to stopping the ‘sins of the fathers’ within and as myself, and sharing the realization that we are products of the ‘sins of the fathers’ yet we cannot blame it on them as they had not known any other way; that the patterns of existence based in fear, separation and survival of the fittest is something that was always passed from generation to generation, forming the next generation that was mutating but not evolving, advancing but not progressing, creating knowledge but no solutions –
and therefore it is up to us here and now to stop the ‘sins of the fathers’ within and as ourselves, so that we may show that we ARE able to learn from history through self-honesty, common sense and the acknowledgement of cause and effect, as we do see and experience the consequences of the accepted ‘ways of the world’ within and without.

I commit myself to educating myself and my world about the necessity of accountability, responsibility and self-directive principle, so that we may see, realize and understand that we will either keep blaming others or be the ones to change.

We will either create or be created: We will either create in self-honesty through self-directive power and responsibility OR we will create in ignorance and denial through our acceptances and allowances and the abdication of our responsibility to a god, a system, or some kind of savior to do it for us.

I commit myself to sharing the realization that no one is coming to save us, and no one can do it for us, lest we be slaves; We have to save ourselves, we have to stand-up for ourselves, we have to take self-responsibility for who we are and what the world is, because the world without is showing us what we have accepted and allowed within – How much worse must it get before we stop!

No one can breathe for another, no one can self-realize for another, no one can stand-up for another.
Therefore it is clear: Self-Honesty, Self-Forgiveness, Self-Transformation, Self-Responsibility is the Key to Freedom, the Key to Life.

Self-Honesty implies the end of self-dishonesty, the end of denial, the end of suppression, the end of separation. It is time we stand equal to and one with the truth of ourselves, as much as it hurts, and realize that we have to Stop blaming, Stop abdicating responsibility, Stop waiting and hoping and dreaming; We have to take responsibility as creators and work with the actuality of reality, work with What is Here, starting with ourselves within, and expanding to our world without.

As above, so below. As within, so without.

It’s time we as humanity place our knowledge into application and take from all knowledge and wisdom only that which can be proven as common sense and lived as best for all – so that we may LIVE it into beingness as ourselves, LIVE it into creation as a new world where the children to come will be free to live and express and expand to their utmost potential.

It’s time we stop accepting life as struggle, and bring forth solutions that will make life FUN – equally for ALL!



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 07 May 2012, 21:50

Bella's Journey to Life Day 24: Images & Ideals in a Men’s World System

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to get irritated every time a man looks at a woman's ass when she passes by.

I forgive myself for justifying my irritation by thinking that a woman is within that diminished to an 'ass' in the eyes of men and becomes a sex-object only.

I forgive myself for justifying my irritation by thinking that it is men's fault that women go into competition with other women.

I forgive myself for justifying my irritation by thinking that it is men's fault that women try to fit the picture of a 'perfect body' as sex-object as presented in the media and porn industry.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to judge men as mind-controlled through pictures of 'perfect bodies'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to judge myself based on pictures presented in this world of the 'perfect female body'.

I forgive myself for thinking and believing a man is not worth keeping because he always looks at a women's ass, diminishing every woman to an ass, and determining the ‘worth’ of a woman according to his idea(l)s of a ‘perfect ass’.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to go into competition with pictures of 'perfect bodies' and to diminish myself to a picture based on my own self-judgment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to expect from a man to 'accept' me and my body when I haven't yet allowed myself to accept myself and my body beyond comparison.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that ‘what men do’ and my own irritation as reaction to that: is showing me my own self-judgment and my own points of comparison/competition.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that men are useless.

Within this I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to take this point back to self and see that I’ve accepted myself as ‘useless’ through comparing myself to the ‘images’ of this world and allowing the fake ‘values’ of the system to determine my worth.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that every man is rotten and corrupted and an abuser.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to take this point back to self and see that I have been abusing and corrupting myself and my body by ‘measuring’ myself against the ‘images’ and ‘ideals’ that are presented to us by the system and by accepting the system to determine my ‘worth’ and ‘value’ based on my picture-presentation and ‘image’.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to think and believe men never respect a woman but only treat women as a servant of their desires.

Within this I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to take this point back to self and realize that I have not respected myself but have accepted and allowed myself to serve the desires of a men-driven system and its fake ‘values’ that diminish living beings and their worth to only ‘images’; and that within this, I have allowed myself to become equal to and one with this very system of abuse and disrespect for life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be ‘angry’ at men or to ‘hate’ men - instead of realizing what this experience of ‘anger’ and 'hate' is showing me: namely that I've accepted and allowed myself to submit to this men-ruled society where women are merely seen as sex-objects and subject themselves to the system, allowing the system and its ‘images’/’ideals’ to determine their ‘worth’;
and that I am in fact angry with myself when seeing and realizing that I've accepted and allowed myself to be influenced by and to define myself through the fake 'values' of this world and to have my self-worth be determined by how women are seen in this world; angry with myself for accepting and allowing myself to like all women exist in comparison and competition trying to 'fit' the ‘images’ imposed on to us by the system, society, the media, the porn industry, trying to ‘fit’ the ‘idea(l)s’ presented to us by this men's world of how a woman apparently should look like to be 'worthy' and 'liked'.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that as long as I have a reaction within me towards men and how ‘they treat women’, I am in fact still treating myself the way men treat women, I am in fact still defining myself through the eyes of men and the system - instead of accepting myself as life and acknowledging the value of life within and as me.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to blame men, other women or the system for my experience of myself – instead of realizing that any reaction is merely showing me what exists within me through acceptance and allowance and that my experience of myself and my actual worth/value is in fact my own point of self-responsibility.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to free myself from the mind-control of this picture-world, in the realization that as long as we follow, serve and define ourselves by the ‘images’ the system is feeding us, and as long as we go into comparison and competition with each-other based on such fake ‘values’: we are not in fact equal as life; because we define ourselves per implication as unworthy and thus we actually make ourselves unworthy by the very fact that we are allowing ourselves to be defined and valued based on the 'measurements' of ‘images’ and ‘idea(l)s’ imposed onto us by the system, society, media, the porn industry.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear competition and comparison - and to desire to be seen as 'the best' and beyond competition or comparison.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to stand equal to and one with this point of comparison and competition, to from this point of self-honesty Stop the ‘inferiority’ I have accepted in that context, Stop attempting to be /be seen as ‘superior’; and Stop the system of comparison and competition within and as myself so that I may live free in acceptance of myself as life in self-equality and oneness.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to expect from others to Stop and eliminate competition and comparison from my world - instead of me being the one to Stop competition and comparison within myself to begin with.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that judgement of others is always revealing self-judgment.


Therefore I commit myself to always take any point of judgment that comes-up within me back to self: to investigate and reveal to myself where and how I judge myself; where and how I make myself subject to my own judgments; where and how I am expecting something from others when I have not yet given it to myself.

I commit myself to stopping any and all points of comparison and competition within myself - so that I may accept myself as life, stand equal to and one with the value of life as who I really am, and live in self-acceptance and self-equality; and so be a living example that we are indeed able to free ourselves from the mind-control, the fears and desires imposed onto us through the ‘images’ and ‘ideals’ of this world system, society, the media and the porn industry, and start getting to know ourselves and each-other as LIFE, valuing ourselves and each-other as LIFE, wherein we stop seeing ourselves and each-other as only pictures, stop diminishing ourselves to pictures in a picture-world, so that we may finally Get Real and give ourselves the opportunity to discover and explore what is REAL.

I commit myself to exposing and demonstrating how we have all become mind-controlled by the ‘images’ and ‘ideals’ presented to us by the world-system, society, the media, the porn industry; and how we all constantly participate in comparison and competition trying to ‘fit’ some 'ideals', not realizing that such 'ideals' are based on ‘ideas’ fed to us by a photoshopped system where people are reduced to servants of the system to keep us existing as slaves to the mind and the mental realm of ‘images’ and ‘ideals’, to keep us existing as happy-trigger robots while the system determines and controls the triggers of our desires and fears and then makes us buy into the products and images that will apparently satisfy our desires and take away our fears.



I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world, a society, where we've made sex into a mental-projection, where we each have a secret alternate-reality in the mind and have lost our ability to honor and express the physical through getting to know ourselves and each-other as the physical living bodies that we are - to such an extent that we have no clue how we as physical bodies in fact function and operate, what physical pleasure and fun can be, because we have approached ourselves and our bodies from the mind as a mental image and have within this separated ourselves from our physical bodies to such an extent that we cannot find pleasure without the projection of the mental images we have conditioned ourselves to be stimulated by.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand that all aspects of our fears and desires are meticulously designed by the system to trap us by our ‘weaknesses’ and hit us where it ‘hurts’ – the Ego -, while it uses all media of the world (education, advertising, science and technology, the porn industry and all other industry giants) to feed us with the ‘remedy’: that which will apparently add-up to our ‘worth’ so that we may meet our desires of the perfect ‘image’, the ‘ideals’ of this mind-fucked world –
so that we remain slaves to the system, trapped by our own acceptances and allowances, preoccupied with issues of ‘value’ and ‘image’, so that we may never self-realize the value of life and break free from the chains of mind-control, as that would be the biggest threat to the system since it exists only through our labour and devoted worship.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world, a society, where we deceive ourselves claiming that we are apparently not the human physical body but a divine soul or an eternal being - yet at the same time we fail to see the not-divine nature we entertain in our secret minds and how we use and abuse the physical body to determine 'power' and 'control' in our personal realities toward other people.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that through accepting ourselves to determine 'power' through the use/abuse of our physical bodies as 'image' and 'value' in this world, we are allowing the 'control' of ourselves and our world through such 'images' and 'values' and are thus creating and manifesting a world-system of fake values and ideal-images of the mental that disregards the value of life.

I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see that the world system constantly fuels competition to have its robots/slaves preoccupied mining for 'power' and 'control' while racing against each-other, so that we do not stand-up within ourselves, so that we do not self-realize the value of life and stand together, because then we may once and for all free ourselves and our world from the control we are under – the control of FAKE values as images of 'power', 'beauty', 'worth', ‘dominion’ which we have accepted and allowed and have in fact become equal to and one with.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see, realize and understand that our worth is in essence determined by us, by ourselves: and it will be what we make it to be, it will be what we place ourselves equal to and one with: Either the value of life as equals OR the value of fake images and idea(l)s of 'power' and 'control' as presented to us by the current system.


I commit myself to assisting myself and my world to see and realize that mind-control works from the inside out, and that we are always doing it to ourselves – we are always equal to and one with what we accept and allow within ourselves.

I commit myself to investigating and exposing all fake ‘values’ we have come to accept in the name of ‘power’ and ‘control’, showing that the ‘power’ and ‘control’ as defined and played-out in this world are not real, but are mental images and ideals used and abused to determine and define the ‘masters’ and the ‘slaves’ in a system of inequality and exploitation of life, while in fact all are equally trapped in a picture-world of sick consciousness-systems racing for ‘profit’, ‘power’ and ‘control’ through self-satisfaction, self-worship, self-interest; a world where we don’t get to get to know, explore and work with that which is REAL, because everything of this world is based on and is a product of: the human (literal) race for ‘profit’, ‘power’ and ‘control’.

I commit myself to investigating and exposing how we have allowed the mental to impose itself onto the physical by accepting the mental ‘images’ and ‘ideals’ presented to us by the system as if it were real, and so we have lost touch with the actual reality of ourselves as physical living-being on a living-planet; Instead, we have made a picture-world out of reality, imposing the mental onto the physical and even allowing mental ideas of ‘value’ as Money to determine the fate of the physical –
as money/the mental has become the god in this existence that decides the fates of beings/the physical and dictates who live and who dies, who has value and who has no value, who gets access to earth’s resources and who gets no access.

I commit myself to investigating and exposing how we human-beings have in fact become equal to and one with the mental only, while we ignore, suppress and abuse the physical – and that even within the mental we are not equal because we do not dare to see, face and confront the entirety of our mental reality but instead we hide from ourselves within ourselves and allow parts of ourselves to be unconscious and to drive us from the darkest corners of ourselves while we refuse to take responsibility for who we are and what is going on within ourselves:
thus accepting and allowing mind-control, which, as can be seen here, works from the inside-out; as we end-up existing as the output of the input we’ve been programmed with in unawareness, unwilling to investigate what drives us from the inside and how we have come to accept and allow all that which lurks in the darkest corners of ourselves set out to lead us where it hopes to find ‘validation’ of its ‘value’ through ‘power’ and ‘control’ based on the ‘images’ and ‘ideals’ of this world-system that raised us...

I commit myself to investigating and exposing how we human-beings have in fact become equal to and one with the mental only, while we ignore, suppress and abuse the physical – and how as the mental we consume ourselves and each-other as the physical, and manifest only more and more suffering, death and starvation in this world which is a reflection of ourselves – as within so without; as above so below.

I commit myself to exposing the lie we have called ‘li(F)e’ and demonstrating that there is nothing to be won out of the current system, there is nothing to be won out of playing the game as ‘human race’, there is nothing to be won for LIFE. The only actual ‘winner’ is the system itself. People die and are forgotten, but the system prevails. The question is legitimate: What is actually 'alive' – the human being or the system?

I commit myself to demonstrating that it is possible to create and manifest a win-win situation for our world – and that to get there, there is no other way but to acknowledge LIFE as the actual value, the only real value worthy of honouring – a value that is equal in all – and to construct a system that will support and honor the value of life in all possible ways; a system that will nurture life instead of feeding off of life; a system that will support all life equally.

Obviously, to get there, we cannot deny that we have to change our ‘evil ways’ and stop consumer ourselves and each-other, stop feeding off of life, and start nurturing ourselves and each-other in self-realization of life as the actual value we all share



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Bella
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Re: Bella's Journey to Life

Postby Bella » 08 May 2012, 23:23

Bella's Journey to Life Day 25: Automated Mind Constructs | Back-Chat Revealing the Evil nature of Consciousness as Egomaniac

In my previous blog I wrote that whatever we judge is in fact showing us a point of self-judgment we hold within ourselves.

Yesterday I fell into the trap of my bubble of ego again, and this showed me (again, and unfortunately too late) how the thoughts and perceptions we generate within the back of our head as back-chat: cannot be trusted; as back-chat exists in automated thought-patterns that in turn trigger responses as emotions, feelings, moods, attitudes, which we then try to 'validate' and 'justify' through further back-chat -- creating in the mind a fuzzy logic designed to 'validate' and ‘support’ self-righteousness and self-interest, in other words Ego.

So what happened is, I had met with my friend F. and when we parted I asked when we should meet again, knowing that F. has a week off from work. F. did not answer my question directly but said “we’ll see, I have some things to do, I don’t know... you know where I live, call me”. So from here, I had this thought that my friend does not want to spend time with me otherwise we could directly schedule something; and then I had the feeling that I am always the one to set a meeting and that I invest more into it than F., and from this thought the feeling was triggered that the situation is unfair and why should I care so much. From this, the thought emerged that F. doesn't really care, and then I felt 'used' and 'tired of it all' and felt like I don't want to invest in this anymore as I always end up disappointed, I had had enough... such and similar thoughts started cycling in my mind as back-chat, which placed me in the position of a ‘victim’ and F. as the one to ‘blame’.

This happened at the train station where I was taking the train to work, and as I got on the train the thoughts and energetic experience accumulated, and instead of stopping myself and making sure I let it go before I proceed to any action, I made the mistake of writing a message to F. saying in a few words that I was disappointed and had enough of investing into this friendship.

In that moment, I experienced a 'silence' in the mind, a relief - but it didn't last long until I realized that that wasn't actual silence or relief, because I wasn’t in fact seeing and realizing my ‘role’ within it all and how I had created the whole experience but was instead projecting the whole thing onto my friend thus abdicating my responsibility.

When I saw that, I went into guilt and self-judgment, realizing that the point doesn't get resolved by me externalizing my reaction/my issue onto my friend.

I regretted having sent the message and realized I should have resolved the issue within myself first and get myself to actual silence/clarity before I take any action or share any words about my experience.



It’s fascinating to see how persuasive the back-chat in my head was, how persuasive the energetic experience was that had taken over me in that moment completely - I was trapped within a mind construct which, to make matters worse, is not that unfamiliar to me, and in that moment I was unable to see or consider anything beyond that!

Seeing how the nature of the back-chat was so 'persuasive', I cannot but realize that no matter what the mind brings up, and especially when there is an energetic experience connected to it : it cannot be trusted!
I am flagging this point LOUD AND CLEAR for myself - because I really don't want to mess up my relationships, I really don't want to hurt people in my world with words of blame and judgment, and I really don't want to find myself in this loop of self-sabotage.

Another point to flag is blame and judgment, because really, I ALWAYS find (after I've allowed myself to take the time and look at things for what they are) that what I judge others for, I do as well, one way or another. ALWAYS.

What I am realizing, is that whenever I allow back-chat to create my reality and experience, I am going into a state of mind where it's only about what "I need", what "I get"... it's all about "me, me, me", whereby I as the mind go into a cycle of: self-victimization through projecting blame onto others - regret of my behavior and fear of having fucked everything up - guilt upon realizing the selfish nature I had allowed myself to become - self-judgment by reversing the blame onto myself - until inevitably I find the only solution is to forgive myself, let go of all the above (blame, regret, fear, guilt, self-victimization) and find practical ways to Stop myself from re-creating such experience/reality through my participation in the automated back-chat of the mind.



What I want to lay out for myself, is the Mind Construct in its timelines of thoughts and emotional reactions, meaning the singular steps of "he said - she said - I thought - I felt etc. -- so as to have a blueprint I can identify whenever such experience comes up, BEFORE I start following it and participating in it, BEFORE I start believing the back-chat and set out to 'validate' it!
Writing it out, for me to clearly see the steps I follow while I drive myself into this vicious cycle - so as to be able to STOP myself in time, BEFORE I enter it.

Through laying out the mind construct, I can identify the trigger points (be it words I hear, situations I enter, or thoughts that come up) and the automated reactions that are thereby triggered: so as to be able to STOP myself from 'pulling the trigger' and from sentencing myself through sentences in the back-chat of my mind.
Flagging the trigger points is like assigning a point with a red flag going “Attention attention! This situation / word / thought indicates prospective fuck-up if I allow myself to react in an automated response. Stop and Breathe!”

A vital point is obviously the practical self-corrective application in the actual moment. So what do I want to do? First of all, to in that moment SLOW DOWN. Realize: I am facing a reaction. I know this reaction, it is not new. I know the personality that attempts to ‘validate’ and ‘justify’ the inner experience that boils up within. I know the consequences. I know the fuck-up. But I am Here. I have a choice. I can Stop, let it go, forgive, move on.

If it’s persistent, I can use writing as venting. Become that personality in writing, rant and rave and spit it all out until the energy runs out. Take a breather. Read through it in self-honesty: then I can see things for what they are and recognize what it was that I had allowed myself to go into. And once the ‘game’ has a ‘name’, it’s easier to see and determine that This is not who I want to be, this is not How I want to Live!




I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to beLIEve the automated thought patterns that emerge as back-chat in my mind, instead of realizing that the back-chat in my mind is the ego-personality of myself trying to ‘win’ every situation to boost its ‘worth’ and ‘value’ in the mind through power-games and self-righteousness.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to go into self-victimization, not realizing that such application is an expression of ego as the conditioned self-consciousness I have accepted and allowed myself to become throughout my life.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to Stop the back-chat, but have instead followed the back-chat in an attempt to 'validate' and 'justify' the experience of myself - not considering that the experience of myself is a triggered reaction of energetic nature that only seeks to satisfy self-interest and self-righteousness.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to Stop the moment I saw myself going into projections of blame towards another, since I know and do realize that blame towards others always indicates the abdication of self-responsibility and accepted ‘inferiority’ within self, from which the cycles of self-victimization emerge.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my responsibility to the mind as automated pilot to drive my decisions, my words and my actions - instead of standing-up within myself in self-equality and being the one to self-honestly determine and direct my decisions, my words and my actions in every moment.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to become equal to and one with Ego as self-consciousness to such an extent, that I have failed to see another's starting-point, another's needs, another's situation; I have failed to care for another, and how could I, since I in that moment of conflict/friction did not even care for myself as life, but only for the 'validation' and 'justification' of my ego-personality as the mind construct that was activated within and as me based on past programming and accepted self-definitions of ‘inferiority’.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define my value and worth based in polarity, which implies the need for comparison and competition and ideas of 'more than' and 'less than', all of which is taking place in the mind and is designed to satisfy only self-interest as ego, as that which I've accepted and allowed myself to identify with in that moment of conflict/friction.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to consider the 'persuasive' nature of back-chat which will bring-up any fuzzy logic to 'validate' and 'justify' the experience of the ego-personality.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to (even though I have witnessed and fell victim to the unacceptable nature of back-chat as ego) Stop myself in time, before I place faith and belief to what automatically comes-up in my mind.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to Stop myself from going into 'victim-hood', even though I have already witnessed and experienced the dire consequences of allowing myself to victimize myself and from there 'attack' others in an attempt to 'balance-out' my experience of myself and the accepted 'inferiority' I was experiencing -

which goes to show the nature of the mental/ego as the trap of polarity, whereby in the end we are like the snake that bites its own tail: we are doing it to ourselves, we are abusing ourselves and others equally, and are not in fact LIVING but only playing games -

the power-games that were imprinted onto us throughout our lifetime in the world system as ‘way of life’, and thus this 'way of life' comes-up ‘naturally’ in the mind and in our behaviour as the automated mind constructs of our personalities that we formed in our process of fitting in and coping with the world;
and by following and acting-out such mind constructs made-up of conditioned thoughts, emotions, feelings and moods as the personalities we identify with: we become more and more a personality only, a mind construct acting-out, instead of a living-being LIVING by directing itself in self-awareness as life and common sense self-determination.



I commit myself to investigating and flagging the trigger points to which I react, so that I may in the moment Stop myself from reacting, realizing that reacting automatically would be to exist in the past replaying the patterns of the past and not in fact responding to the here-now moment in self-honesty.

I commit myself to slowing down and breathing the moment I experience the slightest reaction within myself, so that I may bring myself back Here and take the self-directive power in my hands to lead myself to clarity in self-honesty, without blaming, victimizing or inferiorizing myself or others.

I commit myself to - in the moment I notice the slightest reaction within myself - Stop and bring myself back Here, breathe, slow down, and make sure that I have seen, realized and understood the point my experience / my reaction reveal to me; so that I may take self-responsibility, Stop myself from reacting and bring myself to self-clarity and a responsible response to the situation, without blaming, judging, or victimizing myself or others.

I commit myself to Stop rushing, as I realize that rushing is an energetic build-up experience that tends to lead me to following and believing the mind, following and believing the pettiness of Ego as it presents itself to me in the back-chat of my mind trying to ‘validate’ itself in self-righteousness and self-interest. I realize that in that moment of following and believing the back-chat /the personality – I BECOME it; it is what exists within me through my acceptance and allowance of the ‘ways of the world, this world system, what we call ‘life’.

Yet I see, realize and understand that what we call ‘life’ is not life in fact, it is a way of life brainwashed into us through all systems of this world so that we keep the system running through conflict and friction.
Within and without, it is a system that feeds off of the substance of life: Just like on the bigger scale the world-system feeds off its people through money as profit and self-interest, on the smaller scale the individual mind-system as ego in self-interest feeds off the living flesh through energetic power-games of polarity. And so we are not in fact Living, but we are consuming ourselves and each-other in an endless conflict of interests.

Life is in fact Giving. Ego is always Taking.

So what will we be?

I commit myself to in every moment remind myself of my decision to be Life, to be Giving, to be Equal, to be Here in every breath, to support Life – and so I commit myself to in every moment reiterate and reinforce my decision for Life, made visible through my actions and words I speak and who I am within that.

And as I train myself to stand for Life, I do not allow myself to wallow in regret, guilt or self-judgment whenever I make a mistake or fall into the trap of the mind – but stand-up directly to forgive and let go and reinforce my commitment, as I realize that every breath counts – with every breath we accumulate ‘who we are’ and therefore it is futile to waste breath on self-judgment, guilt or regret. Rather realize the fall, flag the points for future reference, and stand-up to walk in self-respect.


It is painful to see the truth of ourselves, but that is no excuse for avoiding to reveal and expose the actuality of reality as ourselves – because if we don’t see who we are we cannot see how we are creating this world and how we are creating our children in our image and likeness who then will in turn re-create the same world system over and over again. And since we all agree that this world cannot continue as is –
we really do have to get over our egos, and start supporting ourselves and each-other as life, start transforming our relationships into relationships of self-honest communication and support, so that w may bring forth a new world where the value is LIFE and therefore no power-games are required nor personality-suits to ‘fit’ the system. We can be who we are as life and learn to express and expand without the limitations imposed onto us by an inner and outer system of fear, greed and exploitation that literally forces us into survival-mode.

Survival is not Living. Fear is not Life.

It’s time we stop the fear of survival, both in the consciousness of the self and in the system of the world.
It’s time we stop surviving and start Living; take the Dare to discover who we really are as Life.




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