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Day 138: Fear of death 1
Often when I think about death I see, that I saw all and I have enough experiences in my life. But if I stop myself and think better, I see that I want more. I want to see some places more, meet some people, do some things that I love to do. In real I don't yet know why I live, what is my purpose in core. And when I think about travelling and have some adventure I think about not have money, not have time, relax, abroad, calm, blank mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that to have adventure need money and time. When and as I think that to have adventure need money and time, I stop and breath. I realise that I don't need money and time to have adventure, but I must only decide to have fun. There are one person who write, that to travel you not need a money, because you can earn it during the travel or if you write about your adventure and people pay you for that. I commit myself that when think that I need money and time for adventure I start living and each moment become a big adventure.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that have adventure is only if you travel abroad. When and as I think that have adventure is only if you travel abroad, I stop and breath. I realise that travel abroad is travel abroad, but the biggest adventure is when you are in your country and take time for yourself and be with yourself. This is the biggest adventure. Go to the near forest, near village, walk from your town from another. All this is adventure. Adventure is when you do something that you don't do before and you enjoy. I commit myself that When I think that have adventure is travel abroad, I stop, breath and go out of my house and start with adventure.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that only in adventure or vacation you can relax and have blank mind. When and as I see myself to think that only in adventure or vacation you can relax and have blank mind, I stop and breath. I realise that you can have blank mind and you relax in each moment in your life if you do what you love to do and is not so physically difficult. And this is all the time out of the work. You can also have blank mind in each moment when you not need to think too much. So, I commit myself that when I think that I must go to the vacation to relax and have black mind, I stop and breath and go in place where I like to be and enjoy the moment,