https://rauljourney2life.wordpress.com/ ... n-process/
Day 160 – Why am I in process?
Let’s say the truth. I am in a “process” to arrive somewhere, to obtain something, to be something. I have this within me because, I have always felt powerless when tried to change my reality, I didn’t understand, and of course I didn’t, my starting point was not myself, so from this inferiority in relation to my mind, that I victimized myself with, and judged the whole world by, I then kept on living tring to find myself in the cool things I found, went through spirituality, then through Destini, and I have used my process to judge the whole existence, as I have done with my very life, because through judging the world I become good, right, powerfull, in relation to what? To the whole world, superiority. And so I judge everyone. What I have not realized yet is that through judging others, I am in fact making the statement that, yes, I have in fact a starting point of looking for my superiority, because I still feel powerless. If I didn’t, why would I judge others? I do it to create energy and distance myself more and more from them so I can feel powerfull within myself, when I never felt in fact.
If I see someone “inferior” to me, and I judge them, I am in fact judging myself in first place, it’s my own judgement, and then, since I am not negative, but its opposite positive, I’ll go and “help” the person by making them positive and negative simultaneously, caging them and enslaving them, while meanwhile I am not allowing myself or anyone else to exist. When you exist, you exist, there is no need for fear, or positivity. There is choice.
And also, that way of “helping” can be used to do any atrocity you want, in order to “help”, it sucks.
So I will stop judging people because of their processes, and I will forgive all reactions that come from parts of me, parts that I still believe need “saving”, “helping”, because I am not willing to face that I am in fact negative. And I am charging its opposite. And through judging others, I use my attention to feed my mind, and imagine specific scenarios, projections, to react, and be superior, in relation to the inferior people. And through being superior, I separate myself from the people I judge, and then I am alone and separated from them, them from the starting point of being inferior. And within that I am in fact saying to myself that there is a part of me within me that is inferior, and I have fed its opposite superior positive pole, so I can face that I exist with no negativity or inferiority, and how is that going to be possible as long as I am positive? So me and others are together in this, and people can be of support to balance my need of considering myself superior in certain ways. And I will be giving away anything because, it existed as inferiority, and just, why not empower everyone and everything? What is the need of not doing that? What’s missing?