My first encounter with marijuana was somewhere back in 2005 I think, but I started smoking marijuana regularly in September 2006 and was smoking it till July 2007, that was 9 months all together and that was practically the whole 4th year of high school. That was back in high school and there were five of us from the class that were smoking joints together. I must say I had very special experience while high/stoned on marijuana and that was basically why I got so addicted. I was hearing music on some deep spiritual level, I enjoyed eating so much, I was seeing people's aura and I was seeing faces from the past reincarnations in other people's faces. Everything great, but in June 2007 a strange thing happened: I was starting to have bad trips. I was was getting paranoid while stoned and I had this feeling that other people are constantly watching me. I also had some strange mind illuminations while stoned that made no sense. At this point I should have stopped smoking marijuana, but I didn't because I was so addicted. That was probably my biggest mistake in my entire life, that I didn't stopped to smoke marijuana at this point. It all went to such extent that psychosis erupted in July 2007 and I was hospitalised the same day. In hospital they gave me on drug test and in addition to THC I was also possitive on opiates, that is because the dealers sprinkle marijuana with heroin.
I forgive myself for smoking marijuana.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become addicted to marijuana.
I forgive myself every joint of marijuana smoked.
I forgive myself I have lived such a stupid and irresponsible life, drugging myself.
I forgive myself for creating brain damage by drugging myself.
I forgive myself for becoming psychotic because of smoking too much marijuana.
I forgive myself for destroying my mind/brain by drugging myself.
I forgive myself for destroying my life/future by drugging myself.
I forgive myself fo accepting and allowing myself to be depressed because I destroyed to some extent my mind/brain and my life/future by drugging myself.
I forgive myself for not stopping to smoke marijuana in spite of bad trips and paranoia.
I forgive myself for not stopping to smoke marijuana in spite of my ex-girlfriend and my friend telling me I should stop.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become depressed every time I walk pass high school I was attending because of the bad memories of drugging myself and emotional problems.
I forgive myself for having bad success at matura exam because of smoking marijuana instead of learning.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become depressed every time someone mentiones high school/4th year class/matura exam because of the bad memories of drugging myself in the 4th year of high school.