Starting self forgiveness

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Christopher
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Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Focus time in relationships

Postby Christopher » 09 Jul 2019, 21:27

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to focus my time in relationships and love and sex in this world, because i accepted and allowed to participate in the structure of relationships within this world.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Christopher » 10 Jul 2019, 12:20

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to fear of approaching to woman because i accepted and allowed to project that she rejects to me and within this i resist and leave her.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed to procrastinate when i want to aproximante to her, because i accepted and allowed to project that she rejects me and within this i resist and leave her.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to insecurity when i have an opportunity of know woman when, because i accepted and allowed myself to participate in my projections that activated my fears, anxiety and insecurity form myself.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to reject posibilitie of know woman because i accepted and allowed to wish for return to my confort zone where be alone was more easier for me.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to fear of being rejected by woman because i dont see when what feelings and emotions were activated within context.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to resist to walk this point through self forgiveness because i fear to take responsibility.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish for know other woman within a more easier context in my future when i am in a difficult context for know a woman, because i accepted and allowed to fear of difficulties.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to supress my emotions and feelings for woman when i am in a difficult context for know her.

I Forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to project what i say her when i know her because i accepted and allowed to wish for manipulate her for obtain a good answer.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to pride when i have to take responsibility for a woman because i decieve my own self and i try to convince me that escape is a correct way.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Masculine ego.

Postby Christopher » 10 Jul 2019, 20:18

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to compete with other man for get love of a woman.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself feel good when i am in context of winning another man for get love of woman.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to impose myself over other man when i am in context of compete to other for get love of woman.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to atract attention over others when i am in context of compete with others for get love of a woman.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel over others when i get her fall in love within context of compete with others for get love of woman.

I commit myself to liberate myself of parameters of winning of loosing,

I realize that in a society of equality everyone is prepared to win and the concept of winning of lossing disappear and the same way any wish for compete and compare with others, and the consequence is the end of frustrations.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Christopher » 11 Jul 2019, 15:41

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to fear of myself in my relation with my parnter because i unconsciously know how i fuction and how react in moments when my partner says to me how make do thing or when i am wrong, because i accepted and allowed to negative energietic and reactions when others tells me when i am wrong.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to mock and dont take seriously to my partner i context of have a disagrees and conflicts when i dont have reason and i am wrong, because i unconsciously know that if i mock her and i dont take her seriously she get bored of me and this way I knew that she would not bother me anymore and within this, I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to consider how nuisance have a person that tells me when i am wrong.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to believe that i am never wrong in context of disagree to my partner.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish that my partner get bored of me when we have conflicts and disagrees, because i accepted and allowed to think is a nuisance have a person that says me how make do things or telling me my mistakes when I'm wrong.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to justify and excuse me when i am wrong.

I forgive myself that havent accepted and allowed to see in self honest when i am wrong in context of conflicts or disagrees with other people because i accepted and allowed to believe that i am always right.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to complaint to my parnter when she tells me how make do things or when i am wrong.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to let my partner go when we have conflicts and i dont saw when i am wrong.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish of my partner let go with another man when i am upset

I forgive myself that havent accepted and allowed myself hear my partner when she tells me how make do things and when i am wrong.

I commit myself to develop self hontest for see in major claritie the patterns that are perjudicial in my relationships

I commit myself to accept my mistakes for see what patterns and behaviours i should to change for a better agreement.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Masculine ego

Postby Christopher » 11 Jul 2019, 15:58

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to react with an energetic positive experiece when i am in context of compete with other man for love of woman and i am in a position of victory, because i accepted and allowed to believe the parameters of victory or failure in context of relationships and within this i wish to be envidied for the person that competed to me.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself an a positive energetic experience when i am envidied for others.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel better when i am evidied for others.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel better and wish to be envidied with others when i am with woman that others wish to have.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel like winner when i am with a woman that others wish to have.

I commit myself to consider life above the social parameters of winning, loosing, victory and failure and share with others my experiences in this life for support to trascend the masculine ego.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Masculine ego, exhibitionism and voyeurism, pornography, energy movement.

Postby Christopher » 11 Jul 2019, 17:14

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to exhibit sexually my partner when i know that she is atractive for other mens because i accepted and allowed myself to wish of feel envidied with others.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel excited and high energetic experiences when i feel envidied with others when i konw that my partner is atractive for other mans, because i accepted and allowed myself to participate in polarities of voyeur and exhibitionist because my participation in pornography and mind sexual paraphilies.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to feel more than other mans when i have a partner that i know is atractive for other mens.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish of being a sexual exhibitionist when i unconsciously know that this habit awake the sexual excitement in others.

How pornography fuctions.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish of couple show me their sexual lives, because i accepted and allowed myself to feel sexual excitement and high experiences when i watch another couple have sex.

I forgive myself that accepted and allowed myself to wish of see atractive womens having sex because i accepted and allowed to participate in an energetic movements of feel sexual excitement when the womans are conscious that i feel aroused for watch her.

I commit myself to stop my participation in sexual energetic movements about pognoraphy, and stop dimensions of be exhibitionist or voyeurism.



Marlen
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Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Marlen » 11 Jul 2019, 19:24

Hi Christopher, there's several sources of support for what you are experiencing
You can check out this page where many supportive blogs and content has been shared

https://www.facebook.com/pornaltdelete/

There is also this compilation of blogs by destonians sharing about their relationship and experiences with sex and pornography
https://pornaddictsjourneytolife.wordpress.com/

And then you can also read supportive conversations in relation to addictions, including sex and porn as well here https://forum.desteni.org/viewforum.php?f=129

Ultimately a suggestion as well is to also look at who are you without sex, relationships and having that in mind all the time? What remains of you if you stop making the point of your writings sex and the relationship with someone and all that it entails? I'm sharing this because many times something becomes a fixation because we actually want to avoid changing or looking, introspecting into other areas of our lives that are in fact a lot more relevant and important for us to focus on. So, consider that if your entire mindset is only focusing on writing about sex and relationship, then there might be other areas where you could also focus your mind and actions to look at, which in turn can support you to also create awareness and develop change in other aspects of your life, which might assist in stopping only focusing on sex, porn and relationships.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Christopher » 11 Jul 2019, 20:53

Hi Christopher, there's several sources of support for what you are experiencing
You can check out this page where many supportive blogs and content has been shared

https://www.facebook.com/pornaltdelete/

There is also this compilation of blogs by destonians sharing about their relationship and experiences with sex and pornography
https://pornaddictsjourneytolife.wordpress.com/

And then you can also read supportive conversations in relation to addictions, including sex and porn as well here https://forum.desteni.org/viewforum.php?f=129

Ultimately a suggestion as well is to also look at who are you without sex, relationships and having that in mind all the time? What remains of you if you stop making the point of your writings sex and the relationship with someone and all that it entails? I'm sharing this because many times something becomes a fixation because we actually want to avoid changing or looking, introspecting into other areas of our lives that are in fact a lot more relevant and important for us to focus on. So, consider that if your entire mindset is only focusing on writing about sex and relationship, then there might be other areas where you could also focus your mind and actions to look at, which in turn can support you to also create awareness and develop change in other aspects of your life, which might assist in stopping only focusing on sex, porn and relationships.

I think the same of you, but its part of my process and its that is what my mind shows me in this minute, how i am in relation with sex and relationship in this world because the masculine ego develop around relationships. How i dont participated in relationships in this world my process based in how i am, how i reaction and how i am within this context of world of relationships

Now, this process is based inside an agreement for get experience within this area for avoid give a bad experience to another person that is common in this world but for me not, so i am educating for this, because i never considerate have a relationship, i was realize that are abusive and i developed many fears for have relationship.

i had become accustomed to loneliness and make all things in loneliness without support of anyone within this area.

Now, without sex and relationships, I am a worker and I support my family and I try to transform myself into a good parent, it`s a very important part of education in this world. Before i dont considerated this, i was obsessed for change this world and this caused many disorders in my life because i dont wanted to participate in this world.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ogMdhi1XDA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iD8MlHsPTPk

Bernard was direct here.



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Christopher
Posts: 90
Joined: 28 May 2019, 20:22

Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Christopher » 12 Jul 2019, 18:38

If you look, any ego in this world dont tolerate being humiliated by others and then the consquences will be castastrophics because the anger, hate, violence and spite commings up within us, currently i am facing all this, dont is my focus the relationships directly, my focus is how i am within this for develop tolerance and learn to take things with more humor, learing to live.

All are behaviors, personalities and mechanics that are developed in school stage, because we dont educated for have a our emotions and feelngs in control, we are educated for follow impulses. All context that i mencioned in the writings, are contexts that i saw in school stage but i dont participated in it because i know that are strange behaviors and then i left out school.

How i dont have father figure I did what I wanted with my life without considering the consequences then a process was necesary for correct all, believe me i was never as punished as now, but is necesary being punished sometimes to learn, seeing it from the common sense.



Marlen
Posts: 4326
Joined: 12 Jun 2011, 20:16
Contact:

Re: Starting self forgiveness

Postby Marlen » 12 Jul 2019, 19:30

Hi Christopher, It's cool to get to know and understand more of your context it is indeed a good thing that you are focusing on being able to take responsibility and be a supportive person for the people in your life, including being a father.

So, based on the topics you see are indeed your main point of focus, I'll share some Eqafe series that can be very supportive for you to have a direction of where to start and how to start walking some of these points. The material in Eqafe is no different to anything that Bernard would say, so I will still be placing the links here also for anyone else that may be interested in having support for sex and relationships in general, since they have been supportive for me as well.

Also, it doesn't matter if the relationship point is a new thing for you or avoided it in the past, we each have different paths and that doesn't make it better or worse, so, simply different experiences that may come up in our lives in different stages.

So, series I will place for the topics that you might be interested on are:

What is sex: https://eqafe.com/series/6-what-is-sex (in spanish: https://eqafe.com/series/45-que-es-el-sexo?locale=es)

Relationship sucess support: https://eqafe.com/series/27-relationshi ... ss-support (in spanish: https://eqafe.com/series/43-apoyo-para- ... ?locale=es)

and Parenting: https://eqafe.com/series/33-parenting-p ... human-race (in spanish: https://eqafe.com/series/50-ser-padres- ... ?locale=es)

So, there's a plan where you can listen to all of then unlimitedly for a single payment, you can check that plan called Eqafe Unlimited https://eqafe.com/unlimited_plan, which I would definitely suggest investing to since it goes in detail to explain and provide practical application of how you can walk your process - and also perhaps expand the way in which you are approaching these topics too.

There's a series that's being currently published about contempt in Atlanteans (https://eqafe.com/p/contempt-imprisonin ... s-part-319), which I found very supportive when it comes to having lived a life with a lot of emotions harbored towards certain people in disdain, contempt, resentment or a grudge and how to understand it and so walk out of it with the same self-supportive tools.
this is the link for it in spanish
https://eqafe.com/p/desprecio-aprisiona ... -parte-319 this is the first one but it will continue up to number 323 in the next days.


Thanks for sharing.




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