Crying

Share and ask your moments and experiences in random, unpredictable, sudden moments that happened to you - you'd like to understand. Whether it be during a discussion with someone and not understanding why certain thoughts / behaviours came up in you or another. Not understanding another's facial expression or even your own when looking in the mirror etc. So, this thread is dedicated to the everyday life moments we WONDER about but never ask.
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tylersr
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Joined: 18 Jul 2011, 22:49

Crying

Postby tylersr » 16 Jun 2020, 01:27

Crying is quite a puzzling phenomenon, isn't it?

We tend to assign a negative polarity to crying, as something that describes an inability to deal with Reality, or, especially guys will understand this one, a sign of weakness.

And yet, it's like one tends to forget that crying almost always feels good, is cathartic, and some of our most precious moments in life involve crying tears of either happiness or sadness. Yet, society has an element of considering crying negative, interesting...

But I was curious, what are your experiences with crying? How has it come over you in random moments in life? What was the purpose of crying in the days of Total Control-- what are the difference with the role crying has in our Processes to become better at life today?

Any other random thoughts on crying? Please share



Marlen
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Re: Crying

Postby Marlen » 18 Jun 2020, 20:20

Hi Tyler! first of all I share the Eqafe links that explain crying and its differences such as crying emotionally and crying as a release
https://eqafe.com/p/dimensions-of-cryin ... n-part-144

https://eqafe.com/p/the-release-of-cryi ... n-part-145

and crying when overwhelmed with happiness

https://eqafe.com/p/crying-when-overwhe ... -awareness

I'll share my experience lately. The day before yesterday I shed a tear when I saw my daughter eat a carrot for the first time, it was like the beginning of her independence lol and this is the first time I get to understand mothers or parents in general and their experience when seeing their kids grow up. So I reflected on that and how it was a mixture of glee for her becoming this but also a little grief in that beginning of her growing and becoming more independent, it was an interesting moment nonetheless because I didn't 'thought' that 'such things would happen to me' but they did! hehe and I'm glad about it, no judgment, it was a bit of a profound moment for me, which also happened interestingly when in the middle of the labor process I realized I had to 'let go' of having her inside me and had to let her come out and be a being on her own, so! crying in these moments have been attached to such realizations of 'having to let go' of something or someone for example.

The other recent experience is upon watching a documentary by one of my favorite artists and this was in the middle of this lockdown situation and seeing all the places she visited, all the 'forgotten ones' in the world in war striken areas and empoverished neighborhoods as well as seeing how people unite through music made me shed some tears while watching it, in a way grieving 'that world' and seeing so many people around and not wearing masks and not having a distance between each other, this has been coming up more and more recently, where there is a grief of sorts and a longing for that which was. We don't know what may happen, but the tears that flowed that night were because of longing, I didn't judge it though considering there's a lot going on for everyone and this was my way of having a moment with me expressing that which I've been looking at as days go by.

Those have been my two most recent experiences with crying and what I've seen was linked to it. It lasted for a moment, and it did feel in a way as a release.

I agree there's negativity attached, but, it's a way to get to know more about ourselves and see what may be sitting in certain depths within us that may be suppressed and then be opened up and emerging in the form of tears, it becomes an interesting thing to see about oureslves and then deciding if it is something we need to work with, look at, or just a momentary expression as well with no further consequence.

Ok that's it, definitely cathartic and why not a very vulnerable aspect that I'm getting to enjoy seeing come up in unexpected moments - lol like when seeing my daugther eating for the first time something else other than mother's milk.

Take care, be well :)



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tylersr
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Joined: 18 Jul 2011, 22:49

Re: Crying

Postby tylersr » 23 Jun 2020, 09:18

Hi Marlen- Good to see you here again!

And yes, two recent experiences I've had with crying have come as moments of release: one just for myself and all I've been through and walked through, sort of a grief for everything I've had to 'let die' as a part of me through manifested consequence, and then the other more recently was in relation to black lives matter and was more of a joyful reaction in really seeing how people are capable of standing up and making a change, along with the senselessness of what we've accepted and allowed to even necessitate such a change in the first place.



Marlen
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Re: Crying

Postby Marlen » 26 Jun 2020, 15:47

Yep, this will be coming out more in us as we walk through times like these and the consequences of it. I suddenly shed a tear as we were getting ready for dinner and I had the video of a vlogger playing who has a daughter almost the same age as mine, and her voicings came through the video and my daughter reacted with such an interest and curiosity that I hadn't seen before. It made me cry a little because we have been wanting to meet up with other parents so that the children can play but everyone is quite fearful of the virus, so, it made me sad to see her reaction and not knowing how long will it take for her to be in front of a kid her age again.

This also opened up the general thoughts I've been having of the kind of reality she is being born into with all of these crazy nonsense measures being applied. Will have to see how everything unfolds, but it simply sucks so, that moment reminded me of "how things are for now"

This is just the tip of the iceberg though, a lot of people are experiencing deep depression and exasperation due to the lockdowns and this new normal not going away any time soon.

I'd like this thread to be a point of support and sharing doe that kind of moments during this time. To remind us on the best and the potential that we do have in life, and yes this is something we have to walk through perhaps to start recognizing all that we have taken for granted as well.

You mentioned a word that I've been looking at which is grief. I consider many of us are walking different ways of it based on the many things we used to have or be able to do in the past and how that is currently and perhaps even permanently ceasing to be possible. At first I was refusing to experience it, but that would be suppression. So, recognizing grief and walking through it for whatever reason it may be emerging in each one, is something that I recommend doing, to get to a point of understanding of the attachment, the pain, what once was, the people that may be dying, the businesses that are sinking and closing, and a long etcetera.

One can't heal what one doesn't know is causing the pain so, to me this is a very vulnerable moment in humanity and also a moment of transition where we really have to hold each other together, even if socially distancing lol. It sucks sure, but words and expressing ourselves as support is all we have and sharing what makes us sad, grieving together can be supportive as well, to know we are not alone in this.

It is also as you say, a moment to let all of that which wasn't supportive in us die, and give ourselves a moment to grief that old me. I interestingly had that experience after my daughter was born in January, letting go of the old me that was "without a child" and now I'm doing better at embracing my new life. But! There was a grieving time for that as well and I had to recognize it as such so as to not suppress it. It is necessary to then walk into the next phase.

I keep up the idea that what is to come is a necessary change and part of the process. Even if it may seem the worst for now, I think of it as part of what we have to walk through as well.

Thanks for sharing, Tyler




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